New Name
>>Here is your dose of humour...
>>
>>A. Follow the instructions to find your new name.
>>
>>The following is excerpted from a children's book, Captain
>>Underpants And the Perilous Plot Professor Poopypants, by Dave
>>Pilkey, in which the evil Professor forces everyone to assume new
>>names...
>>
>>
>>1. Use the third letter of your first name to determine your new
>>first name:
>>
>>a = snickle
>>b = doombah
>>c = goober
>>d = cheesey
>>e = crusty
>>f = greasy
>>g = dumbo
>>h = farcus
>>i = dorky
>>j = doofus
>>k = funky
>>l = boobie
>>m = sleezy
>>n = sloopy
>>o = fluffy
>>p = stinky
>>q = slimy
>>r = dorfus
>>s = snooty
>>t = tootsie
>>u = dipsy
>>v = sneezy
>>w = liver
>>x = skippy
>>y = dinky
>>z = zippy
>>
>>2. Use the second letter of your last name to determine the first
>>half of your new last name:
>>
>>a = dippin
>>b = feather
>>c = batty
>>d = burger
>>e = chicken
>>f = barffy
>>g = lizard
>>h = waffle
>>i = farkle
>>j = monkey
>>k = flippin
>>l = fricken
>>m = bubble
>>n = rhino
>>o = potty
>>p = hamster
>>q = buckle
>>r = gizzard
>>s = lickin
>>t = snickle
>>u = chuckle
>>v = pickle
>>w = hubble
>>x = dingle
>>y = gorilla
>>z = girdle
>>
>>3. Use the third letter of your last name to determine
>>the second half of your new last name:
>>
>>a = butt
>>b = boob
>>c = face
>>d = nose
>>e = hump
>>f = breath
>>g = pants
>>h = shorts
>>i = lips
>>j = honker
>>k = head
>>l = tush
>>m = chunks
>>n = dunkin
>>o = brains
>>p = biscuits
>>q = toes
>>r = doodle
>>s = fanny
>>t = sniffer
>>u = sprinkles
>>v = frack
>>w = squirt
>>x = humperdinck
>>y = hiney
>>z = juice