A Jawa vs. Wicket

Started by Twilight Janick3 pages

A Jawa vs. Wicket

The setting: Alderaan, bare-handed.

Jawa, obviously.

I think Wicket, he is bigger (jawa's are skinny), he has teeth and he is a bit of a warrior. Jawa's are selling scrapmetal for a living and get the shit beat out of them every night by the sandpeople.
The outcome of this fight is the same as in a fight between a black bear and a crack-junkie. The bear wins...

But the Jawa is...well..a JAWA!
For the record, we don't even know if JAWAas are skinny...

Originally posted by henniestevens
I think Wicket, he is bigger (jawa's are skinny), he has teeth and he is a bit of a warrior. Jawa's are selling scrapmetal for a living and get the shit beat out of them every night by the sandpeople.
The outcome of this fight is the same as in a fight between a black bear and a crack-junkie. The bear wins...

Jawa has a Gun.

Wicket has a stick.

Jawa > Wicket.

Originally posted by Lord Septimus
Jawa has a Gun.

Wicket has a stick.

Jawa > Wicket.

Dude, he pointed out that its a bare-handed match.

bare-handed: bear > crackhead

Wait, is this the average Jawa, or a Jawa of the Jawa Order of Jawas?

😑

I have no idea

A bare-handed match? Wicket. Jawa's might be uber strong under their robes but somehow I doubt it.

one word:wicket...

These conclusions are valid only because no one has any kind of experience with Alderaan terrain.

Wicket loses. Those little shits may be good in groups, but they're pussies in general. Wicket was scared of a Woman. Imagine if a hooded figure walks up to him with yellow eyes. He'll shit his pants while the Jawa kicks the living crap out of him. Jawas are intelligent. You see the shit they drive? How they can gather the intelligence to create droids and even weaponry to disable them? I can imagine they can apply some of their intelligence in a fight. Jawas have proven smart and that would help them with a fight. An Ewok? Hell, their weapons are sticks and they don't even know what hats are.

And if this is a Jawa Order Jawa, Wicket is done.

A regular Jawa could kick his ass anyways.

Originally posted by Lord Septimus
Those little shits may be good in groups, but they're pussies in general.

..............aaaaaaaaaand Jawas aren't??????🤨

Ewoks= honorable warriors with true fighting spirits

Jawas= no honor whatsoever; purposely selling fukked up droids. The closest thing they have to a fighting spirit is disabling an astro-droid.

Wicket wasn't scared as in "Oh Lord, she gon' kill me!", no. He was weary of a stranger who shouldn't have been there in the first place. (who wouldn't be?)

Consider this: Which one (Jawas or Ewoks) got slaughtered by a bunch of near-sighted stormtroopers who cant hit the broad side of a barn????.......which is even made more pathetic cuz the Jawas have higher technology.

A bear vs a rodent..........gee this is tough🙄

"Yipcha!" > "Utiini!"

Originally posted by Lord Septimus
Wicket loses. Those little shits may be good in groups, but they're pussies in general. Wicket was scared of a Woman. Imagine if a hooded figure walks up to him with yellow eyes. He'll shit his pants while the Jawa kicks the living crap out of him. Jawas are intelligent. You see the shit they drive? How they can gather the intelligence to create droids and even weaponry to disable them? I can imagine they can apply some of their intelligence in a fight. Jawas have proven smart and that would help them with a fight. An Ewok? Hell, their weapons are sticks and they don't even know what hats are.

And if this is a Jawa Order Jawa, Wicket is done.

A regular Jawa could kick his ass anyways.

Word, brutha.

Originally posted by DiamondBullets
..............aaaaaaaaaand Jawas aren't??????🤨

Ewoks= honorable warriors with true fighting spirits

Jawas= no honor whatsoever; purposely selling fukked up droids. The closest thing they have to a fighting spirit is disabling an astro-droid.

Wicket wasn't scared as in "Oh Lord, she gon' kill me!", no. He was weary of a stranger who shouldn't have been there in the first place. (who wouldn't be?)

Consider this: Which one (Jawas or Ewoks) got slaughtered by a bunch of near-sighted stormtroopers who cant hit the broad side of a barn????.......which is even made more pathetic cuz the Jawas have higher technology.

A bear vs a rodent..........gee this is tough🙄

"Yipcha!" > "Utiini!"

Rodent? Now you know what they are?

Wicket was scared! He went to the point of hiding and running away.

Disabling an astro droid? Is that the same one that kicked the shit out of several Seperatist Droids? The same one who distracted Grievous and his guards long enough for two Jedi to get their Lightsabers?

Jawas droids f*cked up? They sold Artoo, didn't they? And their droids are fine.

I don't see the Ewoks scampering around in what is basically a moving building.

Consider this: The Ewoks got slammed by the Stormtroopers during the fight to Endor. And lots of them lived because there were thousands around. Jawas roll together in small groups. And I loved it when they showed that Ewok corpse on screen.

One on one fight? Wicket gets hulk smashed.

Did you see the Ewoks, diamond bullets? They used arrows in an age with laser blasters.

Originally posted by Captain REX
Wait, is this the average Jawa, or a Jawa of the Jawa Order of Jawas?

😑

Pretty much the average Jawa.

And please, don't involve the weapons or the terrain in the debate, the setting has been made clear: both would face on Alderaan, bare-handed. Your question would be: Are Jawas smart enough to make boxing gloves?

Originally posted by Lord Septimus
Rodent? Now you know what they are?

Wicket was scared! He went to the point of hiding and running away.

Disabling an astro droid? Is that the same one that kicked the shit out of several Seperatist Droids? The same one who distracted Grievous and his guards long enough for two Jedi to get their Lightsabers?

Jawas droids f*cked up? They sold Artoo, didn't they? And their droids are fine.

I don't see the Ewoks scampering around in what is basically a moving building.

Consider this: The Ewoks got slammed by the Stormtroopers during the fight to Endor. And lots of them lived because there were thousands around. Jawas roll together in small groups. And I loved it when they showed that Ewok corpse on screen.

One on one fight? Wicket gets hulk smashed.

They sold R4-D5, which exploded after like 3 feet. It was at Threepio's behest that they managed to acquire Artoo.

That Ewok corpse was not nearly as satisfying as watching Threepio throwing the filthy corpse of a Jawa into a campfire!

"I find those Jawa's to be rather disgusting creature's."

-Threepio

Have you read the Mos Eisley Cantina Anthologies?; everyone hates Jawas........Wuher the Bartender, Labria, The Wolfman, The Gotal, The Duros, The Ithorian, The Bith Band, Muftak and Kabe, The Tonnika Sisters, Dannik Jerriko............EVERYONE

Then Ewoks are likely to hate Jawas as well.

Originally posted by DiamondBullets

Have you read the Mos Eisley Cantina Anthologies?; everyone hates Jawas........Wuher the Bartender, Labria, The Wolfman, The Gotal, The Duros, The Ithorian, The Bith Band, Muftak and Kabe, The Tonnika Sisters, Dannik Jerriko............EVERYONE

Err...So? EVERYONE hates a SITH LORD, SL are damn powerful.