The character of a person

"When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends."

Do you believe that this is true? Do you believe that you can judge a person just by looking at their friends?

I have quite a lot of friends who smoke...and, well, they smoke quite a lot...they're also into heavy drinking and get up to a lot of mischief...but I'm not like that at all...I'm not easily influenced.

I wouldn't say by any means you can judge a person by looking at their friends.

The one thing you could say is perceivable from that is what kind of actions and acts they are possibly comfortable to be around, but even then it's not totally clear.

-AC

No. Peer pressure or whatever would influence someone into acting differently when around their friends.

Where's the quote from btw?

It's a Japanese proverb🙂

Sure, in the beginning, people hang around eachother cause of their similarities, but over time the differences begin to emerge.

I dont believe that the quote is an accurate estimate however it would give you a rough idea.

Not sure if it helps.

I don't think you can judge a person by their friends, I can judge a person by looking at them, but not by who they hang out with.

Originally posted by Makedde
I don't think you can judge a person by their friends, I can judge a person by looking at them, but not by who they hang out with.

How do you do that with the looking at them. Are you psycihc?

Originally posted by Bardock42
How do you do that with the looking at them. Are you psycihc?

Kinda. I can just look at a person and know instantly whether I can trust them, if they are kind of charactor, that sort of thing. It's intuition, really, and maybe a little something else. 🙂

Hmmm. I think it's creators more intended it to be a reflection of more general personality traits - the idea that a person wouldn't have friends they couldn't stand, or whose views and actions where abhorrent to them. And the way one responds to their friends - does ones take a tough stance with them if they do something one doesn't agree with? Or do they go along with it? Leaders, followers and all that jazz.

Ergo, if you, using stereotypes, hung around with a bunch of jocks who laugh at disabled people falling down stairs, and you laugh with them then you must be at least a bit like them personality wise - something which reflects on your character, as you wouldn't have friends who you didn't like or at least have something in common with. The whole birds flock together thing. Or more simply if you are friends with a bunch of saints (or bastards) then logically you to must be a saint (or bastard) otherwise why would you be with them? If your not like them but go along with them it says something about your character. Friends, like clothes, they would say, reflect on you.

Of course it's an overtly simplistic way to approach things. In reality it isn't nearly as easy as that, personality/character is a complex thing, and there are some people who act differently around their friends then when they are alone, or with others. At the very best you might be able to pick up some very basic generalities, but nothing you could write an in depth profile with. And those generalities could very well be wrong.

No. Peer pressure or whatever would influence someone into acting differently when around their friends.

But for some that in itself could reflect on character, if you find yourself acting differently to fit in - weak willed, eager to impress, eager to conform, scared etc. Wrong perhaps, but there are those who look at things that way.

Originally posted by Roulette
"When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends."

Do you believe that this is true? Do you believe that you can judge a person just by looking at their friends?

It is somewhat true. "Friends" are supposibly people who have common traights and many similarities in character. For example, you chose a friend because he/she likes the same things.

Of course there are false friends, for example gangs. That's like a group mentality. The "members" tend to follow a so-called leader, because of fear, need for popularity, or whatever. They act differently when they're with "the gang", so they won't ruin their reputation. I've met such people.

I think the quote should not be taken as a general rule. People are different from each other, and people change.

Originally posted by Imperial_Samura
But for some that in itself could reflect on character, if you find yourself acting differently to fit in - weak willed, eager to impress, eager to conform, scared etc. Wrong perhaps, but there are those who look at things that way.

Hmm....depends....I act differently around different groups of friends, based on how they are. Like..Ill muck around (or...be more of myself) with one group, because I know they'll tolerate it more and so on. With another group Ill be 'normal' and so on......so if you looked at one side of my friends, you'd only pick up half of who I am.

If you (using the first post scenario) saw me hanging around with a bunch of smokers and so on, you couldnt judge me by how you see them. Looking at friends rather than at the person, you can get a false judgment...

Originally posted by Mišt
Hmm....depends....I act differently around different groups of friends, based on how they are. Like..Ill muck around (or...be more of myself) with one group, because I know they'll tolerate it more and so on. With another group Ill be 'normal' and so on......so if you looked at one side of my friends, you'd only pick up half of who I am.

If you (using the first post scenario) saw me hanging around with a bunch of smokers and so on, you couldnt judge me by how you see them. Looking at friends rather than at the person, you can get a false judgment...

True. I also do that to a degree. It's all part of the diplomacy of social interaction.

And it's true what they say about never judging a book by it's cover - a person might think they have a gist of a person by looking at them with their friends, to they can't really know unless they take the time to actually get to know them.

Originally posted by Makedde
Kinda. I can just look at a person and know instantly whether I can trust them, if they are kind of charactor, that sort of thing. It's intuition, really, and maybe a little something else. 🙂

Yeah, I know what you mean... its not something so incredible to do as some could think, it just need a little use of intuition.

Well all my mates are potheads and so am I, so I guess you can to a certain extent

I really don't know, Most of the time yes, but 5% you never know.

Originally posted by Roulette
"When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends."

Do you believe that this is true? Do you believe that you can judge a person just by looking at their friends?

I have quite a lot of friends who smoke...and, well, they smoke quite a lot...they're also into heavy drinking and get up to a lot of mischief...but I'm not like that at all...I'm not easily influenced.

I don't know if it applies to everyone, but it definately applies to me. About 75-80% of my friends are exact carbon copies of me: Latinos who are either former or current gang-bangers, with either a shaved head or slick-backed hair and a mexi-stache and goatee, and who's hobbies include: drinking, smoking weed, poker, pool, and hopping in lowriders.

and the rest of your 25-20% friends

Originally posted by Roulette
"When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends."

Do you believe that this is true? Do you believe that you can judge a person just by looking at their friends?

I have quite a lot of friends who smoke...and, well, they smoke quite a lot...they're also into heavy drinking and get up to a lot of mischief...but I'm not like that at all...I'm not easily influenced.

Originally posted by Roulette
"When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends."

Do you believe that this is true? Do you believe that you can judge a person just by looking at their friends?

I have quite a lot of friends who smoke...and, well, they smoke quite a lot...they're also into heavy drinking and get up to a lot of mischief...but I'm not like that at all...I'm not easily influenced.

I wouldn't say it is universal but it is something to consider.

Originally posted by finti
and the rest of your 25-20% friends

Everyone else; people of different ethnicities, ages, and of both sexes. As a matter of fact, I've become friends with quite a few of my customers at the chop shop I own and manage. I also have a couple of cop friends. I know a lot of bartenders and DJs as well.