I went to a water treatment plant one day with my father, for a tour. Because he works with that, or some shit. And i had the gright idea of asking "Whats the worst thing that has ever come through those pipes, into here?" And the answer was "Well, i dont want to go into detail....but a dead baby." So i begin thinking "what's he holding back....could it be half a baby?"
Heres joke, not for the kids, though...
This couple is laying in bed when the wife wakes up and says: "Honey, wake up, I...I just had the strangest dream"
"Oh yeah, what was it about" The husband asks
"well, i was at an auction and they were auctioning off Penis'. The really big ones were about 5,000 bucks...and the 2 inchers went for about 50..."
So the husband asks "how much was mine?"
She says "oh, they were giving yours away for free!"
Then the husband remembers his dream "Honey, i had a similar dream!."
"oh yeah, baby, what was it like?" She asks
"well i was at a vagina auction and they were selling the really nice vaginas for 50 grand, and the older ones for about 2,000."
"oh yeah, how much was mine worth?"
"Worth? Thats where they were holding the damn auction"