Game Wars Episode III: The Revenge Of Sony
Hi guys, here is a little spoof script that I have been working on called Game Wars Episode III: The Revenge Of Sony. Feel free to post your comments about it.
Synopsis of Game Wars Episode III: The Revenge of Sony
It’s a dark time in the gaming world, Nintendo are losing more and more followers and the powerful Anakin Skywalker is seduced by the long dead leader of Sony to help him save his company from ruins. Meanwhile Obi Wan Kenobi must fight his through the evilly turned Exutives who have turned on him since Order 66.
Twenty Century Fox Logo opens up with music and the narrator talking.
Narrator: In a galaxy not so far away, in fact on a planet not so far, oh **** I am talking about my own planet, a secret organisation from the past is coming back to re kindle an ancient feud between its mortal enemy. This will put the future of the galaxy I mean gaming world at stake. Now at a secret headquarters, in the middle of absolutely nowhere our story of love and betrayal begins.
Switch to a shot in the headquarters where two men are walking and talking.
Anakin: What is this important message you had for me, master?
Obi Wan Kenobi: Well Anakin I could not tell you in front of the Jedi I mean Nintendo High council. They have a job for you.
Anakin: What job Obi Wan?
Obi Wan: The council want you to spy on the Chancellor?
Anakin: And why is this Obi Wan?
Obi Wan: They are afraid of our sales going down; you know how the DS has been going down in sales. Goddamit why won’t those kids buy it even if we sell it to them for £30 they still don’t buy it.
Anakin: We can talk about the sales later master but what has this got to do with the Chancellor.
Suddenly Obi Wan looks round and makes sure that people are not listening. Then he turns back to Anakin.
Obi Wan: Well the council feel that he is not to be trusted.
Anakin: Master don’t believe the council again, they are not to be trusted. Like remember the last time they asked you to advertise the DS, with their subliminal advertising they turned more kids on crack then actually sell any of our products.
Obi Wan: Don’t disrespect the council Anakin, their ad was awesome specially those cows smoking those cigars.
Anakin: Don’t be stupid Obi Wan that ad was stupid and you know it and I don’t sense any evil in the Chancellor. He cares for the wellbeing of this company.
Obi Wan: Anakin don’t let your vision cloud you, next you be saying that he will bring in workers benefits.
Anakin: He did that four months ago master, God keep up with the times.
Obi Wan: Ah it seems that my old age is creeping in.
Anakin: No I think you have got a drinking problem.
Obi Wan: Anakin what did I tell you I was cutting down.
Then suddenly he takes a bottle of beer from his pocket and drinks it in one go.
Obi Wan: Ah sweet sweet beer. Anakin why am I feeling tipsy?
Anakin: Well that’s what you get from drinking seven of those bottles in a single afternoon
Then Obi Wan suddenly pukes over Anakin’s shoes.
Anakin: I stand corrected you get that to. Well there go my new shoes, oh ****, Padme is going to kill me.
In the high officer of Chancellor Palpatine, Anakin has been summoned to a meeting with the high ranking Chancellor.
Anakin: Sorry I am late Chancellor the Jedi I mean the Nintendo High Council wanted to see me.
Chancellor Palpatine: It’s alright Anakin, I was just playing with this delightful little Alien bubblehead, I got it from Canada for $25.
Then suddenly he taps its head.
Chancellor Palpatine: Ah Anakin look at its head move, it’s these moments like these in life which I truly treasure.
Anakin: Chancellor what did you want to see me for.
Chancellor Palpatine: Ah yes Anakin you are working very hard, you really care for this company don’t you.
Anakin: Very much sir.
Chancellor Palpatine: I can sense something is troubling you.
Anakin: Yes it’s the Jedi I mean Nintendo High Council I feel they are driving this company to the ground, first the smoking cows then the smoking sheep.
Chancellor Palpatine: I can feel your anger, it’s very strong, and you want to punch Obi Wan for puking over your new shoes. I know how you feel my boy, once my former master burned my brand new Dragonforce tour jacket which got signed by Hermin Lei His name was Darth, I mean Master Plagues. His time came to him soon enough, oh yes it did. Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.
Anakin: How did you know about that Chancellor?
Chancellor Palpatine: I know because I can sense it, its called physic intuition. Well you are dismissed; leave me in peace with my precious Alien Bubblehead.
Then suddenly the Chancellor takes out a Predator Statue from his draw and holds it just above the Alien Bubblehead.
Chancellor Palpatine: Now Alien prepare to meet the evil Predator. Ha Ha I am the Predator and prepare to meet my wrath. Oh no who should save me now somebody please help me?
Then he takes out a Freddy Kruger and Jason figurines.
Chancellor Palpatine: No fear Freddy Kruger is here, now where are some teenagers. Oh Jason you’re here too, what’s the matter mummy got her head chopped of again. What you call me, oh you want to you to come over there. Come here and fight me like a man. Don’t you wave that sword at me?
Then he pulls out a Spock, McCoy and Kirk figurine from his draw.
Chancellor Palpatine: Can’t we work this out in a logical manner. There he goes with all that logical shit again, Jim shut that Vulcan up for a second. Both of you shut up, I am Captain James T Kirk and I decide what goes.
Then he takes out a Darth Vader and a Luke Skywalker figurine from his draw.
Chancellor Palpatine: Luke Obi Wan never told you what happened to your Father.
He told me enough, he told me you killed him. No I am father, Noooooooooo
The he pulls a Batman, Catwoman and Joker toys from his draw.
Chancellor Palpatine: Bruce help me…. Ha Ha Batman, never get a woman to do a mans job. You are going to go back to Arkham where you belong, Joker.
While he is playing with his toys, one of the Chancellor Palatine’s main advisers come in.
Chancellor’s adviser: Umm Sir we have got a jet waiting for you to take you to LA in five minutes. E3 awaits you.
Chancellor Palpatine: What did I tell you about knocking, dude? Summon my royal red guards, come let’s go. God next time knock, boy I was having fun before you barged in here. How am I supposed to plan total gaming domination when my adviser comes in every five minutes asking me to come here and come there?
Then his guard stands there all sad shuffling his shoes.
Chancellor Palpatine: Well don’t just stand there feeling sorry for yourself. We have a new console to show of and a Senate I mean Game industry to rule.