The LEWZMP Thread

Right. The whole story is as follows;

There was once a normal enough girl whose name, for the sake of saving her from the Internet, was Lauren E-------- W------. She was, as Bwa Ha Ha said, a "Popular Wannabe", very insecure and needing to be liked. However, she still acted quite...odd, like us, but would still strive to be popular. As you could guess, these two traits were quite conflicting, because, in addition she wasn't (still isn't, probably never will be) very...bright.

Do you see what this adds up to? For what this is the perfect opportunity to happen? Yes, she became a fangirl. An uncontrollable fangirl.

It started with a Chilean celebrity of sorts on a show called Rojo, that Bwa Ha Ha and I often watch(Bwa Ha Ha daily, I whenever she gives me a tape). So Lauren, with her need to be liked, but lack of creativity and the ability to think for herself (to think at all, really) was forced to adopt Bwa Ha Ha's obsession, so to speak. Only Bwa Ha Ha is not a fangirl. She may seem so here, but she just isn't. Neither am I. We become complete enraptured and obsessed with things, yes, but there is a difference. Fangirls only derive from the male characters or members involved in their obsessions fantasies of their false love of that person, that that person actually knows who they are, that they are the only one that could matter to that person, that the actor and character are the same, these and more are the traits of a fangirl.
Then there are those, like Bwa Ha Ha and I, and some of you, who can actually understand the character and the actor. We respect the two, together and apart. We strive to understand the two and remember the actor does not live to serve the audience, but themselves and, above all, the character.

We can separate them, reality and fiction. And sometimes we choose not to, and that is just as good, for as long as we really know the two, can separate them when we need to do so we can act in reality when needed, we can leave the two together. For as I have said before, fiction can be as important as reality more important to some. Fiction is a constant that will always be there, reality is never the same, from one moment to the next. And reality cannot reach fiction, yet fiction alters reality as it pleases.

It is when one lets fiction not derive into there life, but they completely jump into fiction, leave reality altogether, the realm which they are physically cemented, at least in this life, that they get in trouble. This is our LEWZMP.

Bwa Ha Ha loved the show genuinely, because she understood it, and so loved its humor and randomness. Lauren couldn't love what she did not understand, and when she came to try to understand it, horrible side effects ensued.

His name was Andres Zapata, nicknamed by his piers on Rojo: Shortie. A Chilean star, really. Bwa Ha Ha and I, now that I have seen the show, like him, because he is funny and the center of much amusement and fun making on Rojo.

Lauren however had just been infected by fangirl-ism as she tried to understand why Bwa Ha Ha liked the show.

That is him in the picture.

So, that explains how Lauren came to be
Lauren E-------- W------ Zapata.

There were a series of on going jokes between Bwa Ha Ha and I toward Lauren.

Few of you speak Spanish, I would think, so to explain, one of the jokes is based off of Shortie's last name. Zapata sounds extremely close to Zapato, the Spanish word for shoe. And so Lauren became known as the "Shoe Maker". It is amazing how some people who seem to have a sense of humor, and no problem "dishing it out" become so cold at the first joke (it hardly qualifies as an insult) of which they are the basis.

Let me better explain the time-line. Bwa Ha Ha and LEW became friends, oh, I'd say about a year before I befriended them both. So they knew each other better at the time, as I had only been in the "circle" for a month or two. I had not heard of Rojo when LEW became LEWZ, but caught on quickly and believe it was actually me who titled her "Shoemaker".

There were several other jokes, concerning fangirls who wrote in to the show, and such things, and then. . . DEPRESSION HIT.

Yes, LEWZ actually paid enough attention to the show one day to learn of Alexandra, Andres's fiance'.

She dragged on for a few weeks, often bitter. (Which was truthfully a relief in a way, as she usually went on with a never ending parade on random phrases that were funny, at first. Hour, after hour, after day, after month and year she changed very, VERY little in her ways of attitude, other than this once, it seemed. She never grew in intelligence or maturity, she was the same person, this year as last probably the same the next year as well)

But now, as is often the cycle, it was apparently her time to move on. This time, I was to be the victim, it was to be one of MY obsessions. Star Wars fell into her view and she devoured it as surely as the Sarlac devoured Boba Fett.

We now find an M attached to her name.

Lauren also fancied herself an artist. But as the lack of thinking and creative ability prevented her being widely liked, so did it prevent drawing skill.
In my opinion, the opinion of a fellow artist, I believe your drawing ability is not just based on how well you can actually draw, but you ability as a artist to create what you draw. To Imagine.

Her lack of creative ability allowed her to copy others with perfect accuracy and ease, but it wasn't really art. Copying in order to learn, apprenticing yourself, so to speak, to another artist to develop yourself is one thing. But copying was the extent of her ability. She didn't even try to flourish. Didn't even try. . .

And so as our, certainly my, patience with LEWZM waned, she collected from me one more obsession that was, at the time, more of a passion, as I went home after school and watched it at least one and a half times a day for a month and listen to the sound track during homework and when I worked outside.

This was, for me at least, just about the last straw. But, you see, as I detested her in so many ways, it is hard to despise someone you pity. I pitied her her home life, which was stable, but with a family that was altogether just as odd as she, including two behaviorally challenged sisters, a hard of hearing antisocial father, and an . . . unconventional (at best) mother, all of which was no dough the source of all her anxiety and problems, it was just so hard to successfully break away.
It felt like a teacher abandoning a challenging student. A teacher cannot just leave a student, it won't happen as long as the teacher is able. And so I tried, Bwa Ha Ha and I tried to change her, to spark any intellect or further thought of any sort. Oh how we tried.

In Vain.
I was now ready to abandon the student who had turned out to be politician in disguise; unlearning, set in her ways, and altogether helpless.

I was ready to break away for all these reasons.
Not to mention, she "adopted" The Phantom.

LEWZMP

Lauren
E--------
W-------
Zapata
Maul
Phantom

And that's the story.

LEWZMP is her indifferent (she wouldn't even know the meaning of the word) and popular yearning ways started to try and control Bwa Ha Ha (a seemingly impossible task, to govern Bwa Ha Ha, yet for all her will and her stubborn ways Bwa Ha Ha can be quite submissive, but only when she feels threatened, I suppose, and the only thing she is afraid of is stupid people, which is how I ended up being the guardian of sorts, at least outside the forums, having to defend her often against Stupid People, of which there is no shortage (Louyichy Lho'uldsichy Aear'nlichy Motichy Aefe'ndd'ichy Lours'elf'yichy La'ichy Aitbichy).

And so, at lunch, having come to loath my apparent superiority to her, being able to draw my own creations, speak rationally as well as be silly and random, and now to envy my friendship to Bwa Ha Ha, she came to try and dominate me, I guess you would say.

The old advise, how does it go? It is better to keep your mouth closed, because then they can only guess your intelligence. Open it and they know.

Ah, what an example. With her D's and C-'s (I understand grades aren't everything, government schooling has many serious flaws) opposing my A's and B+ she tried to outsmart me, which, as you may have guessed, went rather badly for her.

She became quite touchy and odd. Actually became unhappy at where I was sitting, tried several failing and rather sad insults(if you could call them that. I believe one was, "WELL, YOUR FACE IS WEIRD,SO YOU CAN JUST SHUT UP!"😉, tried to muster Bwa Ha Ha and Maria (aka She Who is Bitter, another close friend) against me, then proceeded to accuse me of turning Bwa Ha Ha into a goth.

I, myself am not Gothic, though I often where black and am quite fond of things that tend to be graphic, gore filled, or so deep in meaning that she must think them gore filled, or in some way Blasphemous, for she is too a devout Baptist, though she never attends church, and she has quite a problem understanding those who do not follow the Bible blindly. (No insult intended to members of any faith. Really I believe it takes great courage to follow your beliefs without proof. It is only those who cannot accept others' beliefs and so try to change them at the cost of those who are content with their own beliefs. If it were for this, think of how little war their would be.)

And so I was accused of blasphemy(in a lower term, like "not believing in God-ness" or something, she didn't even use atheist, which I am not. I have my own faith, thanks) in my Edgar Allan Poe and Stephen King loving, black wearing ways and was accused of converting Bwa Ha Ha to my ways. Bwa Ha Ha fondly named the event "The Lunchtime Argument", all of which she can tell you better probably.

So, thats it.
Thats the story of LEWZMP.
Just a poor, not very bright person with whom Bwa Ha Ha and I were once friends.

Please feel free to ask any questions.

Bwa Ha Ha, please add on to this if I have missed something.

Hmm. . .LEWZMP.
Illogical.

Yeah, I've got a question...

What the bloody freakin' h*** does this have to do with anything that is on this forum? This is more of a LJ rant or something that should be put in off-topic. Not only did I fail to see anything related to pirates, I failed to see anything remotely related to Disney.

So yeah...I don't agree with either side, because you really come off as...I can't say, because I don't want to get into trouble for flaming you.

I only put it here because it is the members of THIS forum who asked who LEWZMP was, not the people of the off-topic forum. It would be kind of pointless to explain to the people who didn't ask the question, now wouldn't it?

I posted it here so the wouldn't have to go looking for it in another forum.

So it has to do with the Pirates of the Caribbean Forum, because its members wanted the story and for many other reasons which you would know if you paid any attention to the threads on this forum.
There.
Logical.

ICHY COMMANDS YOU WITHOUT FLAMING YOU!

Then you ought to have posted in LJ and directed people in that thread to your post, instead of creating this utterly pointless one.

And yeah, whatever to your cute little picture. Is that the worst you can come up with? Trust me, I've had worse, and I'm already in a bad enough mood. Push my buttons some more, I dare you.

Illogical Emotionalism.

It is not cute.
It is Monty Python.

It tells the story of LEWZMP, the story that was requested by members of this forum.

If you are in a bad mood, stop provoking others and go calm yourself.
If you find it so pointless, WHY KEEP POSTING HERE?

Stop being so mean.

Surreal__44, let the administrators deal with it.

And why do you have to be so mean, and demeaning.

What?
All I did was respond to a request of a group on this forum. Several threads here don't have much to do with PotC, but the members of the forum. I posted it here because this is where we talk of LEWZMP.

Surreal_44, please, if you don't understand my reasoning, you don't have to post, since you don't seem to be part of the Ichy circle, or even know who Ichy is, just let it be.

Sorry, sorry. I really am. I'm having....what could reasonably be considered a s***** day...no it's beyond even that. It is so impossibly bad and it flipping just got worse.

So I do apologize. I was out of line.

No problem.
Perhaps LEWZMP infected you...
All is forgiven and I too apologize if any harm was caused.

I wonder if any of those people still wonder about LEWZMP though. . .

Im sorry Imperial just to let you know your thread isnt probably gonna last 🙁 Rogue my close it. So I hope you dont get sad or anything.

Ichy...is that the sheep on Bwa Ha Ha's siggy?

affirmative lol

....that's what I thought.

I won't get sad.
Emotion, remember?

I'm just trying to satisfy Bwa Ha Ha and those Ichy people.

Surreal_44 let me ask you a ?

Do you have issues with the world?
Let the mods handle it, this is not your problem.

Many seem to think this thread was a mistake.

My question is where have all the people who wanted this story gone?

Bwa Ha Ha
Lher'ewichy
Are'aichy
Mou'yichy?

Where are the Ichy Followers?