Just read this and give opinion please

Just read and give comments, please. No, it isn't from a book.

God has ways of telling us all how things are supposed to be done. For example, you ever hear the story of David and Goliath? Giant man is killed by little boy. You honestly believe that a slingshot would take out someone that destroyed towns with one hand? Nah. There had to be something else with him. We all know it deep down. Have you ever stared up to the sky and asked why God abandoned you? I asked that every night for so long that it is as if he just tuned me out. Bad time to do it. I remember praying one night that I would die. Just waiting for that moment. But when that window of oppertunity came, I knew that I do not ever need to do that. Well, not until my new task is finished. Not until my fist comes down on those too strong to feel it. I want to show everyone that I will not just sit down. I am now prepared to be in a war that will show the world that you can fight in numerous ways. My way will be one that will FORCE the world’s eyes open. No longer will I be taken down by those who sat themselves above others. Not this night. Not ever again.

interesting...

dude, go see the religion forum.

This has nothing to do with religion.
It's a part of a script and.......... Forget it. Dicks like KoK and Spartan005 will then just randomly walk in and say it sucks because I made it.

That was incredibly Retarded.

I like this one better.

Have you ever stared up to the sky and asked why God abandoned you? I asked that every night for so long that it is as if he just tuned me out. Bad time to do it. I remember praying one night that I would die. Just waiting for that moment. But when that window of oppertunity came, I realized that I can’t do it. Well, not until my task is finished. Not until my fist comes down on those who believe themselves to be too strong to feel it. I want to show everyone that I will not just sit down. I am now prepared to be in a war that will show the world that you can fight in numerous ways. My way will be one that will FORCE the world’s eyes open. No longer will I be taken down by those who sat themselves above others. Not this night. Not ever again.

I didn't see a point in it to be honest. shrug

You're not supposed to right now.

still, *2nd one*

interesting.

Originally posted by Ultraman Baltan

Have you ever

Originally posted by bogen
SHUT THE FVCK UP!

Reported.

woot

You're babbling on about god yet say it has nothing to do with religion?

...

Right.

A) There is no god.

B) I didn't know you made it until you said you did. (Though I did suspect you made it.)

C) It was written well, but the concept doesn't pack any punch.

D) Reported for unprovoked attack.

I didn't actually FULLY made it. My friend ****** gave me a bit of an idea.

Originally posted by Ultraman Baltan
I didn't actually FULLY made it. My friend ****** gave me a bit of an idea.

Just a tip.

Another tip:

Try not to change your verb tense. You said "I asked God..." then shortly thereafter "It is as if..." You changed verb tense from past to present. Not a HUGE deal, but if you keep the verb in one tense, it makes things less akward and easier on the reader.

It's part of a script.

Originally posted by Ultraman Baltan
It's part of a script.

Realism has nothing to do with it. Well, not until later on.