POTC Mad-libs

Elizabeth watched Jack ___CHEW__________(1) the woodwork of his ship for the last time. Like a ____PANTHER__________(2), she stalked towards him, her heart racing. It was ____COUNTING ALL HER EGGS IN ONE BASKET____________(3).
“Sometimes you have to say ______ADIEU______(4) to your first love,” Jack whispered.
Elizabeth nodded, knowing that one day __SHE AND WILL WILL BREAK UP_______________(5). “As my father always says, __WAIT AN HOUR AFTER YOU EAT BEFORE SWIMMING______________________(6).”
She was close enough to smell the _DONUTS_____(7) on his breath, as she wrapped her arms around him and began ORAL SEX____________(8). In response, he pulled her closer and allowed his hands to trace her ___BELLY BUTTON_______(9) ____GINGERLY_____(10). Elizabeth thought she was in ____TAHITI______(11).
“This is better than ____SEX AND THE CITY_________(12),” Jack murmured, when suddenly he heard the __KAPLOWIE________(13) of the handcuff on his __PINKIE______(14). “I'VE HAD IT WITH WOBBLY LEGGED, RUM SOAKED PIRATES____________(15)” Jack exclaimed. “You’re more of a __LORD MCFATTY__________(16) than I thought.”
“It’ll be alright,” Elizabeth assured him quietly. “__JACK AND LIZ WILL LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER___________________ (17)”

Very funny one, Kate!

1. something kids like to drink (legitimate!)
2. term of endearment
3. POTC character most likely to put a smile on your face (can't say Jack)
4. overused cliche
5. adjective
6. body part that comes in pairs or more than two
7. favorite fruit
8. cherished childhood toy
9. quality that makes a man sexy
10. another role Johnny Depp has played
11. something you could easily see Liz doing in AWE
12. verb
13. something we would like to see Liz and Jack do

"What's wrong?" Jack asked Elizabeth, sliding a bottle of _____(1) her way. "Just tell me, your old ______ (2) what the trouble is."
"I just thought I'd be married to _______ (3) now," she sighed. "I'm so ready to be married.
Jack cleared his throat. "You know, Lizzie, I am the captain of the ship, which means ____________ (4). I can perform a marriage, as it were, right here on this deck. Right now." He said the last two words with a _________ (5) gleam in his eye as he stared at her ________ (6).
"No, thank you," she snapped and stood up.
"Why not? We are alike. We both enjoy ________ (7) and playing with _______ (8) in the tub."
"But you lack a moral center," she argued. "You also lack ________ (9)."
"Trifles," Jack shrugged. "You and I will be together and I know it."
"What makes you so certain? Did ______ (10) tell you?"
"No. They got killed back in Haiti. I'm saying your curiosity will push you over the edge and make you _______ (11)."
"I don't see that happening," Elizabeth said, but with a smile on her face.
"I do," Jack ______ (12). "I see it happening in the very near future. Now why don't you go make yourself useful and _______ (13)."

"What's wrong?" Jack asked Elizabeth, sliding a bottle of __milk__ her way. "Just tell me, your old ___pookie___ (2) what the trouble is."
"I just thought I'd be married to ___Barbossa____ (3) now," she sighed. "I'm so ready to be married.
Jack cleared his throat. "You know, Lizzie, I am the captain of the ship, which means ______I count my chicks before they hatch______ (4). I can perform a marriage, as it were, right here on this deck. Right now." He said the last two words with a ___rambunctious______ (5) gleam in his eye as he stared at her ____fingers____ (6).
"No, thank you," she snapped and stood up.
"Why not? We are alike. We both enjoy _____pomegranates___ (7) and playing with ___barbies____ (8) in the tub."
"But you lack a moral center," she argued. "You also lack ____manly chin stubble____ (9)."
"Trifles," Jack shrugged. "You and I will be together and I know it."
"What makes you so certain? Did ___Willy Wonka___ (10) tell you?"
"No. They got killed back in Haiti. I'm saying your curiosity will push you over the edge and make you ___have hot passionate sex with Beckett____ (11)."
"I don't see that happening," Elizabeth said, but with a smile on her face.
"I do," Jack ___giggled___ (12). "I see it happening in the very near future. Now why don't you go make yourself useful and ___do a strip tease to "Sexyback"____ (13)."

HAHAHHAA oh that was a good one. im really enjoying this.

one more and then i'm out for a bit.

1. room in someone’s house
2. weapon
3. scandalous article of clothing
4. expletive used to get someone off your back
5. very private belonging
6. off-color compliment
7. trick of manipulation
8. insulting male nickname
9. a game with a skanky twist
10. a disgraceful or painful activity
11. verb
12. something you think Elizabeth should do in film 3
13. karate move
14. type of weather

Beckett was in his _____________(1), counting his money, when Elizabeth showed up. She was wielding a massive ___________(2) and wearing a ____________(3), so Beckett promptly rose to greet her.
“Good evening,” he said pleasantly.
“_____________(4),” she replied. “I’m here to steal your _________________(5).”
“Well that’s not very nice,” Beckett whined. “Especially since _______________________(6).”
“Don’t try and ____________(7),” Elizabeth snapped. “Do you realize what you did to me?”
“I rescued you from having to marry that __________(8)! Trust me, it was all for the best. Now how about we sit down and play a nice game of _________________(9)?”
‘I’d rather ___________.(10)” Elizabeth said. “Now if you’ll just ______________ (11), I’ll be on my way.”
“Not so fast,” Beckett said, stepping in front of the door. “You’re not going anywhere until you promise to ___________________.”
Elizabeth had heard enough. She did a _________(13) that landed Beckett on the floor, and ran out into the _________(14).

Kate, you are too funny.

Beckett was in his ___SUNROOM__________(1), counting his money, when Elizabeth showed up. She was wielding a massive ___CATAPAULT________(2) and wearing a _____BABYDOLL_______(3), so Beckett promptly rose to greet her.
“Good evening,” he said pleasantly.
“______GET LOST_______(4),” she replied. “I’m here to steal your __MEMORY CHEST_______________(5).”
“Well that’s not very nice,” Beckett whined. “Especially since _______________YOU HAVE NICE BOOBS________(6).”
“Don’t try and ___PULL A QUARTER OUT OF MY EAR_________(7),” Elizabeth snapped. “Do you realize what you did to me?”
“I rescued you from having to marry that __NANCY-BOY________(8)! Trust me, it was all for the best. Now how about we sit down and play a nice game of ___NAKED JENGA______________(9)?”
‘I’d rather _WATCH BARBOSSA EAT__________.(10)” Elizabeth said. “Now if you’ll just ______SWAN DIVE________ (11), I’ll be on my way.”
“Not so fast,” Beckett said, stepping in front of the door. “You’re not going anywhere until you promise to _____CAPTAIN YOUR OWN SHIP______________.”
Elizabeth had heard enough. She did a __JUDO CHOP_______(13) that landed Beckett on the floor, and ran out into the _SUNNY WEATHER________(14).

Last one for me too for a while.

1. verb
2. something that happens more than once in the POTC movies (exp.: the dog hording the keys)
3. body part
4. kind of dance
5. verb
6. favorite team of superheroes/magic people
7. gross liquid you would never drink
8. the funniest thing Liz could possibly do
9. adjective
10. annoying musician
11. adjective that describes Tom Cruise
12. body part
13. most random song lyrics you can think of
14. adjective
15. article of clothing
16. kind of pie
17. actual line in the POTC movies that sounds just fine in the context it's in, but in another situation, sounds completely dirty.

"That's the second time I've watched that man sail away in my ship," Jack said as the Black Pearl _________ (1) into the distance. As it faded, he remembered Elizabeth was with him this time.
"We have to get off this island before _________ (2) happens!" she screamed at him. He covered his ________ (3) in response.
"Listen, love," he said, "Will will be long dead and then I will do a ______ (4) of glee and _______ (5) on his tombstone. So why don't you just start drinking?"
"But we have to do something! We're _______ (6)!" Suddenly, she got an idea. "You should have a drink of ________(7)."
"Now that's the first thing you said right," Jack answered, imagining her __________ (8). But then that sounded downright ______ (9) to him, so he quickly thought of drinking instead.
"Want to hear a song?" Elizabeth snuggled next to him.
"What sort of song? Nothing by ______ (10), I hope."
"No, this is some really ________ (11) stuff." She cleared her ______ (12) and started singing.

Liz's song: _________________________ (13)

"That was _________ (14)!" Jack cheered. That deserves another round." He passed the bottle to her and finally noticed she wasn't wearing a _________ (15). "That's a sexy look, my little _______ (16)."
"A look just for you," Elizabeth cooed. "Now, __________ (17)."

"That's the second time I've watched that man sail away in my ship," Jack said as the Black Pearl ____ballet-danced_____ (1) into the distance. As it faded, he remembered Elizabeth was with him this time.
"We have to get off this island before ___Gibb's storytelling______ (2) happens!" she screamed at him. He covered his ___kneecaps_____ (3) in response.
"Listen, love," he said, "Will will be long dead and then I will do a ___interpretive rain dance___ (4) of glee and ____make popcorn___ (5) on his tombstone. So why don't you just start drinking?"
"But we have to do something! We're ____the X-men___ (6)!" Suddenly, she got an idea. "You should have a drink of ___strawberry soy milk_____(7)."
"Now that's the first thing you said right," Jack answered, imagining her ____wearing a 2 foot high french wig______ (8). But then that sounded downright ___terrifying___ (9) to him, so he quickly thought of drinking instead.
"Want to hear a song?" Elizabeth snuggled next to him.
"What sort of song? Nothing by __the Spice Girls____ (10), I hope."
"No, this is some really ___tasty_____ (11) stuff." She cleared her ___nose___ (12) and started singing.

Liz's song: _____________it came upon a midnight clear...____________ (13)

"That was ____disgusting_____ (14)!" Jack cheered. That deserves another round." He passed the bottle to her and finally noticed she wasn't wearing a ____hooded jumper_____ (15). "That's a sexy look, my little ___mince pie____ (16)."
"A look just for you," Elizabeth cooed. "Now, _____turn hard to starboard and load the canon..._____ (17)."

heeheehee.... this is too much fun. 🙂

1. verb
2. fluffy animal that is not a dog or a cat
3. breakfast food
4. verb that begins with A.
5. slang word for a prostitute
6. adjective
7. your favorite character/actor from Grease
8. verb
9. verb
10. nonsense word

One day, Jack was BREAKDANCING on the Black Pearl when Gibbs, Jack's LEMMING approached him. "Captain," he said, "we were wondering why your compass was vexing you so."
"You see, my little CROISSANT, Jack began, "there comes a time in a man's life when a woman AGITATES a man. She makes life complicated for him, so to speak. Such a thing is happening to me. Isn't life a SLAG?"
"Who is it that's vexing you, Captain?" Gibbs asked, seeming TEARFUL
"Why it's JOHN TRAVOLTA!," Jack answered.
"Jack!" Gibbs shouted in shock. "Are you sure?"
"Undeniably. HE makes my heart VOMIT and my mind IMPLODE."
"Wow!" Gibbs said. "It's just like what my father told me, God rest his soul. I'll never forget when he told me these words: FLOBBADOB
Suddenly, just as Jack was finishing his confession, the Pearl approached land.

i hope there are more when i wake up... 🙂

1. verb
2. some wild fact about Jack, either real or made up
3. character in another movie series
4. sleazy place
5. useless/novelty item
6. infamous cult
7. adjective
8. non-POTC related website
9. magician
10. adjective
11. famous unsolved mystery/unexplained phenomenon
12. body part

"Where did Jack get that compass?" Will asked Gibbs as they were ______ (1) in a longboat.
"Not much is known about Jack except for _________(2). That was before he was the captain of the Black Pearl," Gibbs explained.
"What? He failed to mention that."
"Jack likes to keep things to himself, always has ever since _______(3) stole his diary. There was a mutiny on his ship and they marooned him on _______(4). Now, Will, when a pirate's marooned he's given a ______ (5) and a pistol with one shot. That won't do much good for huntin' or signalin' the _________ (6) to help you. But after a few days in the hot sun with nothin' to drink, that pistol start to look pretty good."
Will's eyes went _______(7). There was more to Jack than he knew.
"How did Jack get off the island?"
"Ah!" Gibbs said. "The whole story is on _____________ (8), but he waded out into the water until all sorts of sea creatures came to him. It was like a trick by __________ (9). Anyway, he roped himself a couple of sea turtles and sailed out of there!"
"Sea turtles?" Will asked. He wondered if Gibbs was ________ (10).
"Aye! SEA TURTLES!"
"What did he use for rope?" Will asked.
There was a long pause. It was as if the two men were trying to solve ___________ (11).
"Human hair," Jack interrupted them. "From my ________ (12)."

LOL!!!!! U guys are hilariouse! I did a few and I'll do the rest later but who would think of POTC mad-libs? brilliant!

Beckett was in his CONSERVATORY counting his money, when Elizabeth showed up. She was wielding a massive LANCE and wearing a EATABLE THONG so Beckett promptly rose to greet her.
“Good evening,” he said pleasantly.
“SHOVE IT," she replied. “I’m here to steal your SECURITY BLANKET."
“Well that’s not very nice,” Beckett whined. “Especially since YOU MUST BE TIRED, YOU'VE BEEN RUNNING THROUGH MY DREAMS ALL NIGHT.”
“Don’t try and PLAY GOOD COP/BAD COP,” Elizabeth snapped. “Do you realize what you did to me?”
“I rescued you from having to marry that PONCE! Trust me, it was all for the best. Now how about we sit down and play a nice game of STRIP-PIN THE TAIL ON THE DONKEY?”
‘I’d rather KISS A TARANTULA.” Elizabeth said. “Now if you’ll just HAND-JIVE, I’ll be on my way.”
“Not so fast,” Beckett said, stepping in front of the door. “You’re not going anywhere until you promise to DRINK A FULL BOTTLE OF RUM.”
Elizabeth had heard enough. She did a ROUNDHOUSE KICKthat landed Beckett on the floor, and ran out into the SPRINKLING RAIN.

"Where did Jack get that compass?" Will asked Gibbs as they were WALTZING in a longboat.
"Not much is known about Jack except for HE PRETENDED TO BE A CLERIC ONCE. That was before he was the captain of the Black Pearl," Gibbs explained.
"What? He failed to mention that."
"Jack likes to keep things to himself, always has ever since RHETT BUTLER stole his diary. There was a mutiny on his ship and they marooned him on LAS VEGAS. Now, Will, when a pirate's marooned he's given a CHINESE FINGER TRAP and a pistol with one shot. That won't do much good for huntin' or signalin' the CHARLIE MANSON to help you. But after a few days in the hot sun with nothin' to drink, that pistol start to look pretty good."
Will's eyes went SPARKLY. There was more to Jack than he knew.
"How did Jack get off the island?"
"Ah!" Gibbs said. "The whole story is on MUGGLENET.COM, but he waded out into the water until all sorts of sea creatures came to him. It was like a trick by DAVID COPPERFIELD. Anyway, he roped himself a couple of sea turtles and sailed out of there!"
"Sea turtles?" Will asked. He wondered if Gibbs was SQUISHY.
"Aye! SEA TURTLES!"
"What did he use for rope?" Will asked.
There was a long pause. It was as if the two men were trying to solve WHY PEOPLE ALWAYS LOOK TO THE LEFT WHEN THEY'RE DOING A MATH TEST.
"Human hair," Jack interrupted them. "From my BIG TOE."

oo! i do!!!! i do!! *points to her nose*

"Where did Jack get that compass?" Will asked Gibbs as they were SNORTING in a longboat.
"Not much is known about Jack except for DOING IT WITH A MOOSE. That was before he was the captain of the Black Pearl," Gibbs explained.
"What? He failed to mention that."
"Jack likes to keep things to himself, always has ever since DRACO stole his diary. There was a mutiny on his ship and they marooned him on AUSTRALIA. Now, Will, when a pirate's marooned he's given a CALCULATOR and a pistol with one shot. That won't do much good for huntin' or signalin' the MORMONS to help you. But after a few days in the hot sun with nothin' to drink, that pistol start to look pretty good."
Will's eyes went STUPIDLY. There was more to Jack than he knew.
"How did Jack get off the island?"
"Ah!" Gibbs said. "The whole story is on YOUTUBE, but he waded out into the water until all sorts of sea creatures came to him. It was like a trick by SOME MAGICIAN DUDE.... Anyway, he roped himself a couple of sea turtles and sailed out of there!"
"Sea turtles?" Will asked. He wondered if Gibbs was FUZZY.
"Aye! SEA TURTLES!"
"What did he use for rope?" Will asked.
There was a long pause. It was as if the two men were trying to solve BOTTLED WATER.
"Human hair," Jack interrupted them. "From my THUMNAIL."

You guys want to create some? It's really easy. Come up with a story first, then just number the blanks. Think of what part of speech it is and then come up with your list. Starting out with "noun," "verb," and "adverb" and the like make it easier but just as funny.

Here is a short one.

1. someone/something that is always on the Pearl
2. verb that ends in -ing
3. place
4. adjective
5. crazy rumor about Liz
6. something that would make Jack cry (can be funny or serious)
7. verb
8. type of candy
9. noun
10. something you do when you're constipated

"Now where is that ________ (1)? I want to shoot something," Jack said as he boarded the Pearl.
"Jack!"
"I told you to stop _______ (2) me!"
"Jack, it's about Elizabeth," Will argued with him.
"Have you considered taking her to ________ (3)? I hear many women find that place _________ (4). Come on, it's not like she's ____________ (5)," Jack said.
"But she'll hang for helping you!" Will couldn't believe Jack would refuse to help them after he listened to Jack sob about ___________ (6) for an entire night. "I __________ (7) you in my arms that night and this is how you repay me!" he yelled at Jack.
"Keep that on the down-low," Jack said. "Fine. What do you need?"
"I need that compass and some ________ (8)," Will added.
"Oh. Well, I guess I should tell you. How do you feel about Davy Jones?"
"I feel like a warm _________ (9) goes by every time I hear his name. He makes me want to ____________ (10)."
"Oh," was all Jack said.

"Where did Jack get that compass?" Will asked Gibbs as they were BERRY PICKING______ (1) in a longboat.
"Not much is known about Jack except for HOW HE"S MADLY IN LOVE WITH TIA DALMA_________(2). That was before he was the captain of the Black Pearl," Gibbs explained.
"What? He failed to mention that."
"Jack likes to keep things to himself, always has ever since HARRY POTTER _______(3) stole his diary. There was a mutiny on his ship and they marooned him on IRAQ _______(4). Now, Will, when a pirate's marooned he's given a RULER WITH NO NUMBERS ______ (5) and a pistol with one shot. That won't do much good for huntin' or signalin' the MAFIA_________ (6) to help you. But after a few days in the hot sun with nothin' to drink, that pistol start to look pretty good."
Will's eyes went DIZZY _______(7). There was more to Jack than he knew.
"How did Jack get off the island?"
"Ah!" Gibbs said. "The whole story is on FANFICTION_____________ (8), but he waded out into the water until all sorts of sea creatures came to him. It was like a trick by DAVID COPPERFIELD__________ (9). Anyway, he roped himself a couple of sea turtles and sailed out of there!"
"Sea turtles?" Will asked. He wondered if Gibbs was FUN ________ (10).
"Aye! SEA TURTLES!"
"What did he use for rope?" Will asked.
There was a long pause. It was as if the two men were trying to solve DARVIN'S MISSING LINK___________ (11).
"Human hair," Jack interrupted them. "From my EARS________ (12)."

These are soooooo AWEsome. I'm LMAO
"Now where is that RUM________ (1)? I want to shoot something," Jack said as he boarded the Pearl.
"Jack!"
"I told you to stop HUMPING_______ (2) me!"
"Jack, it's about Elizabeth," Will argued with him.
"Have you considered taking her to TAHITI________ (3)? I hear many women find that place ANNOYING_________ (4). Come on, it's not like she's GOING TO SLEEP WITH WILL____________ (5)," Jack said.
"But she'll hang for helping you!" Will couldn't believe Jack would refuse to help them after he listened to Jack sob about THE RUM BEING GONE___________ (6) for an entire night. "I STABBED__________ (7) you in my arms that night and this is how you repay me!" he yelled at Jack.
"Keep that on the down-low," Jack said. "Fine. What do you need?"
"I need that compass and some RUM COVERED CHOCOLATE________ (8)," Will added.
"Oh. Well, I guess I should tell you. How do you feel about Davy Jones?"
"I feel like a warm GURILLA_________ (9) goes by every time I hear his name. He makes me want to BEND ON MY STOMACHE FROM PAIN____________ (10)."
"Oh," was all Jack said.

LOL!!! This are cool.

okay, those were fantastic. The chinese finger trap had me howling. oh gracious. this is a lot of fun. 🙂

1. verb
2. something that happens more than once in the POTC movies (exp.: the dog hording the keys)
3. body part
4. kind of dance
5. verb
6. favorite team of superheroes/magic people
7. gross liquid you would never drink
8. the funniest thing Liz could possibly do
9. adjective
10. annoying musician
11. adjective that describes Tom Cruise
12. body part
13. most random song lyrics you can think of
14. adjective
15. article of clothing
16. kind of pie
17. actual line in the POTC movies that sounds just fine in the context it's in, but in another situation, sounds completely dirty.

"That's the second time I've watched that man sail away in my ship," Jack said as the Black Pearl GOBBLED into the distance. As it faded, he remembered Elizabeth was with him this time.
"We have to get off this island before JACK GATHERS HIS EFFECTS!" she screamed at him. He covered his EYELASHES in response.
"Listen, love," he said, "Will will be long dead and then I will do a HUSTLE of glee and GOSSIP on his tombstone. So why don't you just start drinking?"
"But we have to do something! We're THE JUSTICE LEAGUE!" Suddenly, she got an idea. "You should have a drink of SELTZER."
"Now that's the first thing you said right," Jack answered, imagining her PRETENDING TO BE A MAN... OH WAIT. But then that sounded downright AWE-INSPIRING to him, so he quickly thought of drinking instead.
"Want to hear a song?" Elizabeth snuggled next to him.
"What sort of song? Nothing by YANNI, I hope."
"No, this is some really FRIGHTENING stuff." She cleared her ACHILLE'S HEEL and started singing.

Liz's song: "I'M GONNA WASH THAT MAN RIGHT OUTTA MY HAIR, AND SEND HIM ON HIS WAY..."

"That was TUBULAR!" Jack cheered. That deserves another round." He passed the bottle to her and finally noticed she wasn't wearing a CRAVAT. "That's a sexy look, my little CHOCOLATE MOUSSE."
"A look just for you," Elizabeth cooed. "Now, WHERE'S YOUR HEADING, CAPTAIN?"

lmao!!!!!