Martian Minds Tavern!!!!

Howdy,and welcome to the Red vomit,a bar specifically for Heroes and Villians and their misadventures,don't know if it's been done before,don't care!

Cast:

Doorman😄eadpool

Janitor:Thing

Bartender:Mr Fantastic

Drunken customers:

Martian Manhunter
Apocalypse
Dr Doom
Thor
Beta Ray Bill
Super boy prime
Superman
Invisible Woman
She-Hulk
Hulk
Wolverine
Luke cage.
Jubilee
Iron Man
Batman
Lets begin

*Jubilee arrives at door*

Jubilee:Hey DP,mind letting me in?

Deadpool😮f course....

Jubilee😖weet

Deadpool:BUT first,you must answer me,these questions three.

Jubilee😮kay shoot

Deadpool:How many times has Jean grey died and come back?

Jubilee:......who gives a Sh*t...

Deadpool:Correct sir!Numero two.How do i get bloodstains out of my uniform?

Jubilee:...You clean your uniform?

Deadpool:Touche....No3,What have you,in all your years of existence,ever contributed to comics?

Jubilee:........Um....welll.....uhh....

Deadpool😄ONG!!! time's up,sorry Ms Asian/Australian/American,no dice tonight.

Jubilee😖o be it,i swear by my blood that i shall enter these premises,get wasted and have a threesome with She-hulk and Wolverine!!!to the night!!!!

Deadpool:Freak.....*picks back up battered copy of womans weekly*

*Flashes into the bar*

Dr Doom:It's very simple really,The copper springs combine with the orange juice to create a time warp...

Apocalypse😖ilence insect!I am Apocalypse lord and master of this world and all...

Dr Doom😮h shut the hell up,You've had that god complex for 10 000 years with total control of your body and celestial tech,and all you've ever accomplished is having your ass handed to you by some man-hoar in a vizor,an Illiterat hairy Canadian who's only speaking rolls are "Snikt Bub" and some bright blue cat who despite running around naked all the time lacks genitals of any description.

Apocalypse:but....

Dr Doom:QUIET ******pimps slaps Apoc*just wait till we get home tonight,it'll be back to the emergency ward,and it won't just be a candle they remove this time!!

*Doom see's the whole bar looking at him*

Dr Doom😮h....yeah....umm nothing to see here folks

*see's batman looking at him in a funny way*

Dr Doom:What do you want batboy?

Batman😮h,nothing,it's just Dick and i had that problem,it's why we switched to Lightbulbs.

Yeah.....i know it sucks......but it's midnight and i'm bored as hell.....

😘

😆

(Trickster is gonna kill you)

Originally posted by Symmetric Chaos
😘

😆

(Trickster is gonna kill you)

Co signed! 😱

I can almost feel his berserker rage rising from here! 😆

I like the reference to http://www.superdickery.com/science/18.html

Originally posted by Martian_mind
Dr Doom: Silence Fools! Doom is power! Doom is everything! Doom is law! Doom is god! Doom is...

Apocalypse: Oh shut the hell up, You've said Doom that and Doom this, ever since your first debut, and it's still corny and still a 'doom' to everybody's ears. So you have created a machine to time travel, but you still can't fix your scarred face? Or did you really just need the Beyonder's power for that? Oh, and your a Doctor of, what again exactly?

Dr Doom: but....

Fixed. 😛

Iron-man : You ! *points at Superman*

Supes : Yeah ?

Iron-man : Your an unregistered Superhuman , give yourself up before I get my group of badguys-come-goodguys to beat the shit out of you.

Supes : Your f*cking joking !

Iron-man : Hell no blue boy , get your namby pamby caped ass up and out of here !

Supes : *Looks at Mister Fantastic* Hey Reed , has the tin-can had anything to drink ?

Reed : *Cleaning the bar* Nah , he's just been hanging around inhaling the fumes , that whiny b*tch he goes out with will kill him if he touches the sauce.

Supes : You mean the one who lost her kid ?

Reed : Yeah

Iron-Man : Hey dont talk about her like that !!!

Supes : *Backhands Tony through a wall* Simmer down tin-man.

Iron-man : *Dazed* Thunderbolts ! ATTACK !!!

Wolverien : Snikt Snikt Bub Snikt Bub Bub Snikt

*Translated* : I murdered them all with my mighty jobber god powers ,sacrifice yourself to my greatness and perhaps I shall allow you to live to Iron-***

Supes : *Pats Wolvie on the head* There there , the bad tin-man has gone away.

Wolvie : Snikt Snikt Snikt BUB !

*Translated* : You DARE touch me fool ! I will rend you limb from limb , your organs shall become my bathrobe after I bathe in your blood !!!

Supes : I think the little feller likes me

😆 Make sure you have spaces after colons, martian, or you end up with some interesting name... like 😄eadpool...

*Batman sits in a corner by himself, rather lonely, until his eyes pass over She-Hulk

*Bats makes his move*

Batman: Heyy, pretty lady.
She-Hulk: God, not another creep with a green fetish
Batman: Oh, its not just green... I like blondes. Red-heads. Brunettes. Guys.
She-Hulk: Huh?
Batman: Um... nothing.

*Bats attempts to switch topics*

Batman: You know... I've trained to be the best at everything in life. Everything.
She-Hulk: I've trained to snap men like you in two.
Batman: Mmm... kinky.

*Batman's Bat-Blackberry (The Batberry) rings. The 'Nah-nah-nah' tune from his 60's TV show plays*

*Batman checks to see what's up*

Batman: Oh, goddamnit!

*She-Hulk becomes interested*

She-Hulk: What? What happened?
Batman: I got another friggin love-e-mail from this creepy fanboy.
She-Hulk: Who?
Batman: This weird 40 year old who's obsessed with me. He walks around his house in a Batman costume, and I always see him watching with those high-powered binoculars. I've told him, I'm not interested in a romantic relationship!
She-Hulk (with sly smile): That's potential grounds for a restraining order, you know... you're a rich man. Do you know who he is?
Batman: Yeah. His real name's Dwayne, but he insists on being addressed as "Batdude123"

urge to kill......rising.......😈
SBP: "God, why did I have to lose my world? Why did they make me do it? Why does everyone hate me?
Apoc: "Because you are an extremely loud and obnoxious manchild. In my day, children like you would be meat for the hunting dogs." *slaps SBP on the face* "At least you got to murder Superheroes, I haven't been able to do anything in Marvel since the 90s. I SWEAR ON THE BLOOD OF OSIRIS, MARVEL EDITOR MIKE MARTZ SHALL DIE FOR THIS INSULT! SO SAYS, APOCALYPSE!"

Batman: Yeah. His real name's Dwayne, but he insists on being addressed as "Batdude123" hysterical

EXTRA EXTRA! ALCOHAL HAS BEEN BANNED FROM KMC. THIS IS A SPEAK EASY!

Originally posted by Redatom65
EXTRA EXTRA! ALCOHAL HAS BEEN BANNED FROM KMC. THIS IS A SPEAK EASY!

W00t!

KMC sucks. 😛

Yeah, screw KMC. And it's little mods too. 😛 (J/K, please don't ban............ 😉 )

p. 8 of extra.

"moderators meet on the issue of banning ex-playboy editor 'TricksterPriest', updates will arive in evening edition."

Aw shit.....WAIT, PLAYGIRL?! 😠 I want his business dead, his house dead, his family dead, his dog dead, and his horse dead for good measure. 😛

Why, whatever could you be talking about. it says PlayBOY...Perhaps you were merely seeing things that you wanted to see 😖hifty:

Son of a.......😛

Originally posted by TricksterPriest
Son of a.......😛

Gun ?

bastich. 😆

Originally posted by TricksterPriest
bastich. 😆

That too

You'd think someone would have brought Lobo into this so far.