The Final Solution

Comment:
Just a note to tell you that my mailbox is being flooded with mail concerning gas prices and illegal immigrants. To boycott oil companies or not; to provide amnesty to illegal immigrants or not, etc.

Observation:
Since I have become jaded to the various solutions proposed by the Republicans, Democrats, Sierra Club, ACLU, etc., I have elected to solve the problems as they affect me. My response solves both my gas and illegal immigrant problems...

Conclusion:
I will hire illegal immigrants to push my car. They're plentiful and cheaper than buying gas. Then I pay them in Pesos so they have to go home to spend it.

Hahaha, like it.

Sounds good to me.

think of the cost of feeding and maintaining said immigrants, and how long the commute would be (especially if uphill).

ill ride a bike

Why don't you just cut out the middle man and ride an illegal immigrant?

Originally posted by HK47

Conclusion:
I will hire illegal immigrants to push my car. They're plentiful and cheaper than buying gas. Then I pay them in Pesos so they have to go home to spend it.

Well, the joke is on you! They don't speak english. So how are you going to tell them where to push your car? No other alternative than to learn spanish, chinese, cambodian and more.

all you would have to do is say "forward" "stop" and "reverse" in their language as you can still steer the thing. but regardless...

Originally posted by Devil King
Why don't you just cut out the middle man and ride an illegal immigrant?

...win

Originally posted by WrathfulDwarf
Well, the joke is on you! They don't speak english. So how are you going to tell them where to push your car? No other alternative than to learn spanish, chinese, cambodian and more.

A cattle prod and a pointing finger should be enough to get your point across.

Originally posted by Devil King
A cattle prod and a pointing finger should be enough to get your point across.

Yeah, but they could also finger you back. That would get their point across to you.

Originally posted by WrathfulDwarf
Yeah, but they could also finger you back. That would get their point across to you.

That's what the cattle prod is for.

Originally posted by Devil King
That's what the cattle prod is for.

Oh, I see what you mean now....

just beat one into a coma while the others watch. sure you take a financial hit but the longterm gain justifies it.

Wouldn't starving it be more finacially sound?

Originally posted by Devil King
A cattle prod and a pointing finger should be enough to get your point across.

think of the cost of feeding and maintaining said immigrants

Originally posted by Devil King
Wouldn't starving it be more finacially sound?

too time consuming, and the others might sneak food to them.
why spend days when you can accomplish the same results in under 5 seconds?

Why a car if you could have a rickshaw? A...mexican...rickshaw.

Why not build a car that runs on Blood and human organs? That would solve your problems too. Not to mention that it's good for the environment as you're recycling.

sure, we can harvest them with stem cel- aaaaaaah nuts