Hey Folks. Well, I had my night out with the woman who wants to get in my pants. I did learn one thing from her: people who have a gender performance that deviates from the norm are called “gender queer.” I would go one step further and call myself a gender outlaw. Tonight I wore a miniskirt and tried to look as non-androgynous as possible. Honestly, the night out was excrutiating. You know when someone is flirting with you so intensely that they use every moment of eye contact to smile at you or give you a coy “come hither” look? She ordered for me, ordered a glass of wine for us to share, ordered a special dessert and paid for dinner. I felt completely emasculated. Once we went out to the club, a dude tried to order me a drink and my “date” said, “I’M taking care of her tonight!” I kinda rolled my eyes and looked uncomfortable. To cut the tension I said, “You totally cockblocked him.” She was NOT amused. This woman talks a lot and did not give me much opportunity to interject hints about my pull toward the menfolk. When we were at the bar she kept moving closer and closer to me and began touching my arm while talking to me. I then pretended not to have social skills and turned toward the TV monitor and began watching the videos. At 11 0′clock a performer came on who did a sort of industrial mix on his computer and occasionally added a dark, garbled voiceover. He was clad in snug shiny black pants and a fitted black tee shirt. The dude wore heavy eyeliner and was waay hot. After enduring an extended period of dancing with my “date” , avoiding eye contact and maintaining a slight distance between us I realized I could use my attraction to the dude onstage to my advantage. I said to the woman, “He looks like a guy I used to date– except he’s way better looking.” She replied, “Was that recently or a long time ago?” I said, “Uh, actually pretty recently.” Then I got uncomfortable with the silence and said “Hmm, weird.” She said, “It happens.” I’m pretty sure she meant that sometimes we lose our sapphic sensibilities and somehow end up dating a guy. Egads. I think she also just tried to call me. I did not pick up. Obviously I have a hard time setting boundaries and levelling with people about who I really am. I do feel kinda lonely and want more people to hang out with but she is just way too intense for me — even as a friend.