Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
Lookie at this article DA showed me haermmDuring the 18th century Swedish taxonomist Linnaeus invented the classification Mammalia ("of the breast," from the Latin mammae, which sounds a lot like "Mama!"😉 to describe the order of higher vertebrates that secrete milk from mammary glands. He could have chosen as a common element our hairy bodies, the structure of our middle ears or our four-chambered hearts, but none is as exciting. The word breasts appeared in Europe in the 11th century as bhreus, "to well or sprout." *** dates at least to the 16th century but referred then only to the nipple, which is likely from nib, the point of a quill pen. Shakespeare called breasts "chalky cliffs." By the 18th century they had become kettledrums, globes, blubber bags, dumplings and diddies. By the 19th century it was top buttocks, berkeleys, buffers, charlies, nature's founts, panters or toora-looras. More recently -- 1930s: boobies, fried eggs, knobs, knockers, the twins. 1940s: balloons, boobs, maracas, pair. 1950s: cans, jugs, lungs, melons, bazooms, TNT (two nifty ****), gazongas, goonas, snorbs, hooters, wallopies, nay nays, milk bar, shock absorbers. 1960s: baby bumpers, bazookas, funsacks, rack, chabobs, chichibangas, credentials, nice pair of eyes, tremblers. 1970s: honkers, mammaries, bazongas, chalubbies, dangleberries, glands, *** lottery (beauty contest). 1980s: tatas, flight deck, handles, balangas, bazoombas, num-nums, bongos, top set. 1990s: **** udders, puppies, rib cushions, shoulder boulders, chebs, chest flesh, ditties, fleshy bagpipes, nards, nugs, willets.
One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowing in despair he has his first meeting with a demon...
Demon: Why so glum chum?
Guy: What do you think? I'm in hell.
Demon: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here...you a drinkin' man?
Guy: Sure, I love to drink. Love the drinks.
Demon: Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays that's all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, diet tab, and fresca...we drink till we throw up and then we drink some more!
Guy: Gee that sounds great.
Demon: You a smoker?
Guy: You better believe it! Love the smoking.
Demon: Alright! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from all over the world and smoke our lungs out. If you get cancer - no biggie - you're already dead remember?
Guy: Wow...that's...awesome!
Demon: I bet you like to gamble.
Guy: Why yes as a matter of fact I do. Love the gambling.
Demon: Cause Wednesday you can gamble all you want. Craps, Blackjack, Roulette, Poker, Slots, whatever... If you go Bankrupt...well you're dead anyhow.
Demon: You into drugs?
Guy: Are you kidding? Love drugs! You don't mean...
Demon: That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack. or smack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can do all the drugs you want and if ya overdose - that's right - you're dead - who cares! O.D.!!
Guy: Yowza! I never realized Hell was such a swingin' place!!
Demon: You gay?
Guy: Uh no.
Demon: Ooooh (grimaces) you're really gonna hate Fridays.