Happy New Year n'stuff.
Here's my wife dancing to usher in the new year. Oh man, it gets me every time... heheheee
💃 Excellent New Years party
I killed my entire family by burning down my grandmothers house
I raped my cousin's dog (because sometimes you need that lovin that a human can't give)
I crashed my uncles car into a group of nuns, and then curbstomped one of them like American History X
I hacked into UNICEF and drained all of their funds
I slaughtered an entire maternity ward with hydrochloric acid
This is going to be a great year 🙂
Do the cupid shuffle!!!
Originally posted by dadudemon
Happy New Year n'stuff.Here's my wife dancing to usher in the new year. Oh man, it gets me every time... heheheee
I heard the fart at 00:08-09
I just took the largest shit in history. I cannot believe that much feces was in my intestines. When I thought I was done, more and more shit kept coming. I know what it is like to give birth to an 8 pound baby. The Fecal God started the rapture in my intestines and all turds were deemed worthy of heaven. My bowels experienced an exodus so swift and severe that it would make the Jews jealous.
As soon as I got done, I knew no amount of toilet paper and wet wipes would finish the job so I took a shower. My ass cheeks probably looked like they were buttered with generous amounts of Nutella sprinkled with chopped nuts. After the shower, I felt so light and nimble that I grabbed a basketball and tried to slam dunk on my neighbors basketball hoop. So, here I am, typing this story, and I plan to go do pull-ups right after hitting submit. Enjoy.
Originally posted by dadudemon
I just took the largest shit in history. I cannot believe that much feces was in my intestines. When I thought I was done, more and more shit kept coming. I know what it is like to give birth to an 8 pound baby. The Fecal God started the rapture in my intestines and all turds were deemed worthy of heaven. My bowels experienced an exodus so swift and severe that it would make the Jews jealous.As soon as I got done, I knew no amount of toilet paper and wet wipes would finish the job so I took a shower. My ass cheeks probably looked like they were buttered with generous amounts of Nutella sprinkled with chopped nuts. After the shower, I felt so light and nimble that I grabbed a basketball and tried to slam dunk on my neighbors basketball hoop. So, here I am, typing this story, and I plan to go do pull-ups right after hitting submit. Enjoy.
You're temporarily in the state of "Ninja Extremis". Enjoy while you can.