Jack's Worst POTC4 sidekick

So based on rumors, Jerry Bruckheimer's record, and the diminshing quality of the POTC movies, who would be the worst possible sidekick for the legendary, sexy, and incredibly awesome Captain Jack Sparrow? This sidekick would be so bad, you would even consider skipping out on POTC 4 at the theaters.

Zac Efron: rumors are flying about him and he's coming out with that third movie where he sings and plays basketball and tries to look like he likes women. What's it called again?

Dane Cook: all the rage what with his snide remarks and he has some movies under his belt.

Ben Affleck: Bruckheimer used him in Armageddon and Pearl Harbor, both awful. Known as an action star and as a "serious" actor, could he be a pirate?

David Caruso: Bruckheimer uses him as the star of CSI: Miami. With the sunglasses and cliched one-liners, this guy thinks he's super cool and would mop the floor with any pirate that came his way.

Nicholas Cage: This is Bruckheimer's go-to guy, seeing as he did Con-Air, National Treasure, and Gone in 60 Seconds for him. Nicholas Cage is typically good when he is given good material, but every once in a while, we get something truly terrible from him like Ghost Rider. Does anyone here want to see him with a sword and pistol next to Johnny Depp? Anyone?

Dane Cook. HATE him.

I don't like any of them!!!!

That's the point, jacky!

Oh, goodness....I can't stand Zac Efron. That would be totally unspeakable for him to be in Pirates. I'd die!!! death I actually love Ben Affleck and Nicolas Cage, so I wouldn't mind them at all. They'd be really out of place, though.

willo, i don't think ghost rider is the worst of nic cage's. the wickerman is. *shudders* although, that one ain't brukheimer's...

NO NOT ZAC EFRON. He's.. well, kinda cute and all... but he's not pirate material.

Nic Cage either. I love him, but... *shrug*

same goes for ben affleck, like him, but *shrug*

dane cook too.

Zac Efron sounds like the worst there is, so... 😄

Originally posted by willofthewisp
That's the point, jacky!

Sure,but I can't say who I hate most cause I hate them totally equally!! But anyways, David Caruso, the worst posibility 😘

I didn't mean to say I don't like Nicholas Cage. He's usually very good and I love the National Treasure series. T&T wrote it, so it's full of fun. I just absolutely hated Ghost Rider is all, and like someone said above, he would be very out of place in a POTC movie.

if you're sorta talking to me willo, lol, I didn't say that you don't like nic cage... I was just saying that I liked ghost rider and i don't think that was his worst movie.. I've always thought the wickerman is his worst movie.. *shudders*

but yeah, I agree, nic would totally be out of place in the POTC movies.

Lol, I was talking to you. Haven't seen The Wicker Man, but I don't really like any of the remakes of classic horror movies. I don't like remakes in general.

I haven't even watched the wickerman and I'm already hating it. just based stuff on clips and trailers.. and to say the least, it kinda sucks.

the best Nic cage movies for me are the NTs (of course, haha) and Face/Off.

anyway, i can't see nic cage in a POTC one. if he is gonna be in POTC, what would he be? O.O

Willo...I can't vote for any of them.....but Ivebeendeeped would be happy...she loves Efron....Depp and Efron on the same stage..she'd faint! But acting wise....no comparison...Johnny would put these poor actors to shame....I mean, look at Orlando Bloom...I think his career is over.......poor boy, seriously..he was no match for Johnny and Keira. Jeffrey Roesch is great.....and Mr. Gibbs.....but a new sidekick for Captain Sparrow...I'm not sure there is an actor out there that can fill those shoes.....I can't think of one... not one single person!

I think there should be another thread discussing who could be in the movie and not be totally stomped on by the rest of the cast.

Originally posted by lovethemtigers
Willo...I can't vote for any of them.....but Ivebeendeeped would be happy...she loves Efron....Depp and Efron on the same stage..she'd faint! But acting wise....no comparison...Johnny would put these poor actors to shame....I mean, look at Orlando Bloom...I think his career is over.......poor boy, seriously..he was no match for Johnny and Keira. Jeffrey Roesch is great.....and Mr. Gibbs.....but a new sidekick for Captain Sparrow...I'm not sure there is an actor out there that can fill those shoes.....I can't think of one... not one single person!

I put Dane Cook. he's disgusting, sexual, and his mouth is as dirty as a chili fest outhouse......hate him...

hehe...i got the chili fest outhouse thing from Ask a Ninja.com. completely hilarious quote you guys will enjoy.....

"I would do Johnny Depp in a chili fest outhouse. "

in closing, I love Johnny AND Zac who is NOT gay and...i would probably do either of them in a chili fest outhouse....

lol 😛

I must admit that the new Zac piccies are hot though, Ibd... but Zac isn't my most favorite person. Vanessa irritates me, and the irritation sorta extended to Zac. sorry! if it's any consolation, I did like him when HSM came out.. >.<

Originally posted by Jacky Sparrow
Sure,but I can't say who I hate most cause I hate them totally equally!! But anyways, David Caruso, the worst posibility 😘

I don't like Cage because he OVER ACTS EVERYTHING!!!! GAH!!! Why can't this man make a sandwich without acting like he's going to get shot?!?!?!

aw, ibd, Vanessa Hudgeons is just his cover, lol. I know he's not gay, gay. I just can't get into all the HSM hype, so I make fun of it.

Originally posted by sailorleo
I don't like Cage because he OVER ACTS EVERYTHING!!!! GAH!!! Why can't this man make a sandwich without acting like he's going to get shot?!?!?!

lol, sailor, you should see his "why did it burn!?" scene in the wickerman. horrible movie.

I like nic cage tho... he's not that bad sailor! 😛

hehe, HSM. watching 3 just for Lucas.. he's so cute... >.<

would I be mobbed if i said i hadn't heard of any of those people except for zac efron?

Not at all, but I'm surprised you haven't heard of Ben Affleck. I recommend going to imdb.com and looking these losers up...[note: Nicholas Cage is not a loser, just would be a loser if he was in a POTC movie]