Particle Man, a microscopic being whose attributes are deemed "not important" by the song; Triangle Man, a belligerent entity who hates Particle Man, fights with him, and wins; Universe Man, a kinder being the size of the universe, with a watch to go with it (He's got a watch with a minute hand, a millennium hand, and an eon hand); and Person Man, a degraded being who lives in a garbage can, who is also hated by Triangle Man and is defeated by him in a fight.