Originally posted by UnoriginalIt was his new partner, the wild and unstable Mertin Brevvs.
Mertlaugh had been at the Detective game for almost 20 hours now. He felt his trousers vibrate. He pulled out his phone and saw his Brev was calling."Oi. ****"
"Wot u on wiv Mertoff u silly ****" he said mertishly.
"Wot u on about silly dick I'm waiting for you ****" Mertaugh replied brevvishly.
"Let's get a cheeky fukkin nandos, get tanked ya dick, break the ice silly ****" said Mertin like the true archbishop of banterbury he was.
Ten minutes after their particularly cheeky nandos, Mertaugh needed to have a banging shit. He went to the shitter, and sat down. On the loo roll there was a message, left by some mad **** out to shank Mertaugh, or worse. It said "lol brev u got fukkin merked, there's a fukin bomb in the shitter lad ur fukkin done for"
Mertaugh was sick of it. He looked around at the toilet stall walls.
"I'm fukin sik of this brev" he said in a brevvish manner