ASHPD (Portals) Vs. Kirby

Kirby takes on the effect of the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device. If Kirby would ever attempt to suck himself through a portal, who would win? The hole or Kirby?

Will Kirby remain standing, or will the hole cause Kirby to devour himself?

..My brain just .. Ow. 😐 This thread wins forever. Going on your Wiki page.

I believe the internet created memes for situations like this.

How about "Damn it, you just divided by zero, didn't you?"

K, so here's my take on it.

Kirby wins, because he cannot eat himself. If Kirby sucks himself through the portal, he's gone through the portal, and therefore, cannot eat himself, but will likely pull himself through the other portal, ad nauseum.. Thus, he can keep sucking until he's dizzy, but will never eat himself.

Wouldn't that mean the Portal wins?

Will Kirby remain standing, or will the hole cause Kirby to devour himself?

^He remains standing.

That's the only logical outcome, I'd say. However, doesn't Kirby have a pretty solid stance when he does his sucking? I mean, with his stretchable body and a powerful stance, couldn't he suck in his own behind and then swallow himself?

Not sure just how strong his footing is.

Kirby's sturdy enough in this stance, by who-knows-what means, that he can remain still while generating powerful enough suction to cause lift on beings larger than himself, and pull them inside himself. However, if Kirby were to expose himself to both ends of this force, it seems to me that logicly, he'd cause himself to lift, lose his footing, and be sucked back through the portal, but in doing so, could not ingest himself.

Imho.

The only thing that sucks more than Kirby is Jaxx. Kirby wins!

I just thought of another meme for this situation.

"Now you're thinking with portals."

Wait, if he has the power of the portal device currently, how can he still have his suck ability?

That is not the scenario, KK. There are two portals in the corner of a room, as is shown in the picture in the opening post. Kirby stands at the corner, aims at himself through the portal, and begins to suck.

there are an awful lot of sexual innuendos in this thread. i feel uncomfortable. ermm