Snafu the Great
Jerkass Woobie
This idea came to me while I was at work.
"You can't hide, forever!" Wesker's voice rang out throughout the corridors of the Monarch Room.
Johnny had given him the slip. Unfortunately, Wesker had crushed his glasses underneath his heel. Johnny had stunned Wesker with a Shadow Uppercut, allowing him some breathing room.
The movie star made a hasty retreat while Sonya is fighting Evil Jill. Hiding in the shadows, Johnny watches as Wesker steps past him, and steps out from behind him.
"Those were $500 sunglasses, a$$hole," Johnny snarls.
Wesker spins around, preparing to take Johnny's head off with a haymaker...
...only to miss.
WHAM!
Wesker's eyes bulged as he felt Johnny's fist impact against his groin, proving that despite being a genitically-altered superman, even he is defenseless from a blow to the junk.
Hopping up from the splits while Wesker sinks to his knees, Johnny relieves Wesker's shades with one hand, while literally knocking his head off with the other.
Johnny slips the pilfered shades over his eyes as Wesker's body falls to the floor, his head falling to the ground.
"Good...bad...I'm the man with the Nutcracker," Johnny says as he runs off to aid Sonya.