The Witch King of Angmar vs Dumbledore

The Witch King flys on his Nazgul to the Academy and is immediately attacked by Dumbledore. It is a given that both are beasts of magic. So it's LOTR dark magic vs HP light magic. Who wins this epic battle. Both are armed with standard weapons and spells.

Here's the problem. The Witch King has a "no penis prophecy" if we go by the spoken word; while Dumbledore's may be limp and usable as a piss-pump, he's still a man.

WK was also first weakened by a magical blade specifically enchanted to **** up fools like him before Eowyn's stabbed him in the face.

Well going by the prophecy he would win. The Nazgul would probably just eat him for lunch.

Yes I agree that Dumbledore's sphincter is likely to feel the cold pointy wrath of the Witch Kings blade.

His presence alone puts fear into the hearts of men.

...and sharty, lumpy, stinking yellow brown "liquid" in their underpants.

For many have shat their armour over time, faced with the Witch King.

They don't like fire on their robes though, but the Witch King could just come to battle naked, which would make him invisible.

😂

To be fair and subjective, Dumbledore should be allowed to come to battle naked too. Not naming any names, but I think we know who wouldn't mind seeing some of that action.

Hahahahahha. Ewwwwwwwwwwww.

LMAO 😂

Originally posted by Robtard
To be fair and subjective, Dumbledore should be allowed to come to battle naked too. Not naming any names, but I think we know who wouldn't mind seeing some of that action.

That said, the Witch King is weak. Seriously, the Nazgul are sissies.

Dumbledore sends this ***** running away on fire.

Originally posted by NemeBro
Who? mmm

That said, the Witch King is weak. Seriously, the Nazgul are sissies.

Dumbledore sends this ***** running away on fire.

Can't say, but I'll give yuo a hint: His/Her name rhyms with JogueRedi.

Nazgul aren't sissies, sure they're scared of fire, but even tough guys like Superman and Hancock have a kink in their armor.

Witch King screams and Dumbledore's wand explodes in his old hand. He's done it to larger and longer enchanted lengths of wood.

Originally posted by Robtard
Nazgul aren't sissy, sure they're scared of fire, but even tough guys like Superman and Hancock have a kink in their armor.

Witch King screams and Dumbledore's wand explodes in his old hand. He's done to to larger and longer enchanted lengths of wood.

Deleted scenes are not exactly canon. And Gandalf, despite being immensely more kewl and ossim than Dumbledore, is also not all that strong. Dumbledore could take both at the same time.

Originally posted by NemeBro
And they have impressive feats to back them up. The Nazgul don't. Aragorn took on five at once and drove them off.

Deleted scenes are not exactly canon. And Gandalf, despite being immensely more kewl and ossim than Dumbledore, is also not all that strong. Dumbledore could take both at the same time.

With fire, their weakness. Aragorn is also one dope mother****er, if he got the jump on five Supermen with kryptonite, he'd **** them up too. See.

Not deleted, director's cut. Which is the valid cut and not the version the phaggy producers let out due to time restrains.

Originally posted by Robtard
With fire, their weakness. Aragorn is also one dope mother****er, if he got the jump on five Supermen with kryptonite, he'd **** them up too. See.

Not deleted, director's cut. Which is the valid cut and not the version the phaggy producers let out due to time restrains.

Ah, I see. Regardless, Gandalf is weaker than Dumbledore. Magic in LotR is not particularly powerful.

"Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee, the hand cant hit what the eyes cant see"

Witch King sends his dragon thing in form the opposite direction he plans to attack Dambledore from as distraction,
drawing Dumbledore's fire, whilst sneaking up clothesless and invisible behind Dumbledore, slicing him open from arsehole to appetite, Dumbledore's cadaver's wizard guts spewing and pouring out of his savagely ripped open lower abdomen like red sand pouring out of a broken hourglass.

Originally posted by NemeBro
Dumbledore can conjure fire. Like in Half Blood Prince, when he ****ed up the Inferi. Easy victory for Dumbledore.

Ah, I see. Regardless, Gandalf is weaker than Dumbledore. Magic in LotR is not particularly powerful.

Can he do it with a wand that's just exploded in his hands and the turd he just dropped in his knickers?

Yes and no. Let's not forget that Gandalf took down a Balrog and was able to block/counter three simultaneous attacks from three exceptionally bad-ass motherjammers. Aragon, Legolas and Gimli, when they mistook him for Saurumom. Not sure if Daumbledore could have replicated these feats. But overall I'd tend to agree with you.

Originally posted by NemeBro
Who? mmm

That said, the Witch King is weak. Seriously, the Nazgul are sissies.

Dumbledore sends this ***** running away on fire.

It took bloody ages to break Gandalf's staff. 😬

YouTube video

Dumbledore puts the fear of fyre in him before he pulls that attack off. Then he transfigures him into a rabbit or something.