You are being unreasonable. Each private server would most likely be a VM somewhere in a datacentre. It would have its own IP, hardware, storage and power. This is expensive.
If you do a quick check, a Minecraft server is around $15 bucks for 20 people. A shooter like BF4, it was around $60 a month for 32 people server hosted by a 3rd party site.
No doubt Bethesda ****ed it up and I believe it's bullshit that you cannot host a game yourself using a server you have (so build a server, download a client and then host) but $100 to host a server for a year is reasonable.