John Murdoch
Senior Member
Well, I'll start with the bonus round: only chance for the squad is if Polka Dot Man's dots can hurt Thor. Rick Flag, Ratcatcher II, Bloodsport, Peacemaker, King Shark, and Harley are all useless against Thor except for Bloodsport's super gun, which would most likely just annoy Thor, and Starro gets either electrocuted to death or Thor flies into his eye and then electrocutes him. The squad loses horribly against even A1 Thor.
Round 1: Haven't seen Black Widow, don't really care to, but seeing as how the Suicide Squad has prep, they win. Too much variety in power sets and skills (Bloodsport can shoot quickdraw through a bullet, Ratcatcher's rat swarms, and Polka's dots (haha)) and physicals that can match or outright overpower the MCU crew (King Shark, Peacemaker, Harley)...too many advantages for the squad. Falcon going airborne and trying to bomb them is the only chance for the MCU characters.
Round 2: After Falcon and the Winter Soldier, I'd say Cap and Bucky might actually be more boned than the Round 1 crew, which at least have ranged weapons on their side. Steve and Bucky would have to incap Polka quickly or get melted, and this is while dealing with getting shot at by Bloodsport's in-suit arsenal, Peacemaker, Flag, and having Harley and heavy hitter in Shark ready for melee. Also, if the squad just hides and lets Ratcatcher send her rat swarms in on them, the duo would have to retreat to higher ground, opening them up for BS, PM, PDM, and/or Flag to light them up. The squad wins again handedly as long as they don't duke around and let the fight end up being a pure close-quarters brawl.
Round 3: Iron Man dominates unless somehow Polka Dot Man gets the drop on him and his dots can eat through Tony's armor quick. The whole game plan would have to be Polka and BS get out their best shots first and have King Shark come in quick to try to beat down Tony, but seeing as how A1 Tony has literally tanked a tank shell and the turbine blades on the SHIELD helicarrier, along with fighting Thor to a standstill, I say Tony stomps.
I actually think the squad could take out the guardians in Round 4.
MCU Spider-Man dodged automatic gunfire from the Stark drones under Mysterio's control in Far From Home and can do stuff like hold up falling buildings, Peter Parker takes care of business here.
Hulk smashes.