The Thomas Crown Affair Review
by Joe Barlow (jbarlow AT earthling DOT net)August 5th, 1999
Review:
THE THOMAS CROWN AFFAIR
A movie review by Joe Barlow
(c) Copyright 1999
STARRING: Pierce Brosnan, Rene Russo, Denis Leary, Ben Gazzara, Faye Dunaway
DIRECTOR: John McTiernan
WRITERS: Leslie Dixon and Kurt Wimmer
RATED: R
RELEASED: 1999
Thomas Crown is a man who has everything, but still finds his life unfulfilling. Although possessing nearly unlimited funds (witness his impulsive $100,000 bet on one hole of golf simply because it eradicates his boredom for a few fleeting seconds), Crown (Pierce Brosnan) lacks the ability to enjoy the simplest pleasures. Even though his house is staffed with a large live-in crew (including his lawyer!), he finds himself drowning in a pool of loneliness.
He does have one hobby, however: planning the perfect crime. More for a lack of something to do than any real desire to own it, Crown manages to liberate an invaluable Monet from his favorite art museum.
Crown's ploy is eventually discovered by Catherine Banning (a remarkably annoying Rene Russo), an insurance agent in charge of locating the missing painting, who spends most of the film trying to decide whether to capture the hero or hop into bed with him. You know, I think I saw this movie once already this year, only it was called Entrapment and was a heck of a lot better the first time.
The Thomas Crown Affair is a remake of the 1968 film of the same name, which I never saw, but I'm sure it's better than the present incarnation, simply because people remember it fondly. This version lacks any discernible entertainment value. Speeches are delivered without passion, actions are undertaken without urgency, and the story's most interesting subplot (Crown's theft of the painting and the repercussions of this action) are cheerfully jettisoned in favor of a formula romance so stale and unconvincing that it probably wouldn't have seemed fresh no matter what year the movie was released. There's a lot of tension and excitement during the opening and closing scenes, when the crime is at the forefront of the plot, but we sure have to wade through a swamp of sentamentality inbetween these bookending sequences.
But the one thing that hurts the film, that moves it from "mediocre" to "painful," is its leading lady. As portrayed by Rene Russo, the character of Catherine Banning is an unsympathetic Gillian Anderson-wannabe, so confident in her sexuality that she forgets to display a single redeeming characteristic throughout the course of the entire movie. She just expects her (if I may speak frankly) very limited sex appeal to carry her through the events in the story. Russo is a poor choice for the part: she has neither the dynamic personality, oozing sexuality, or magnetic screen presence required to make Banning convincing and likeable. It's not so much that she's a bad actress, but she's definitely miscast here. Imagine Kathy Bates in the Catherine Zeta-Jones role from The Mask of Zorro, and you'll understand what I mean.
Pierce Brosnan, on the other hand, fares somewhat better. With his rugged good looks and intense gaze, Brosnan demonstrates the same sort of charisma he's shown in the James Bond franchise: you may not like him, but it's hard not to watch whatever he's doing.
Unfortunately, that's hardly enough to make this movie terribly memorable. The film invites us to ponder what we'd do if we had everything. The execution of "The Thomas Crown Affair" leaves little doubt in my mind: I'd find a more interesting person to fall in love with, cut the last ten minutes of deadwood from my story, and spend less time straying from fascinating crime scenes into a mundane romance that no one cares about.
RATING: * 1/2 (out of a possible ****)
-------------------------------------------------------- Copyright (c)1999 by Joe Barlow. This review may not be reproduced without the written consent of the author.
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"Average Joe" Barlow ([email protected]) MiSTie #73097 Joe Barlow on Film: http://www.ipass.net/~jbarlow/film.htm
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