Poem Test! What Do You Think? Please, No Big Insults!

Started by Palanfirith2 pages

Well.......is not so bad.....but if I were you........I wouldn't choose writting as my day job 😉

Hey I brought this thread up in honor of frodo baggins, that I do not specially know for he last went online 3 years before I came. Anyhow, look at his poem on the first page.

Originally posted by Mujaffa
Ai! laurië lantar lassi súrinen, yéni únótimë ve rámar aldaron!
Yéni ve lintë yuldar avánier mi oromardi lissë-miruvóreva Andúnë pella, Vardo tellumar nu luini yassen tintilar i eleni ómaryo airetári-lírinen.

Sí man i yulma nin enquantuva?
An sí Tintallë Varda Oiolossëo ve fanyar máryat Elentári ortanë ar ilyë tier undulávë lumbulë ar sindanóriello caita mornië i falmalinnar imbë met, ar hísië untúpa Calaciryo míri oialë.
Sí vanwa ná, Rómello vanwa, Valimar!
Namárië! Nai hiruvalyë Valimar! Nai elyë hiruva! Namárië!

ain't this a damn good poem or what???

Translation anyone???😕

Translation:

Ah! like gold fall the leaves in the wind, long years numberless as the wings of trees!
The years have passed like swift draughts of the sweet mead in lofty halls beyond the West, beneath the blue vaults of Varda wherein the stars tremble in the song of her voice, holy and queenly.
Who now shall refill the cup for me?
For now the Kindler, Varda, the Queen of the Stars, from Mount Everwhite has uplifted her hands like clouds, and all paths are drowned deep in shadow; and out of a grey country darkness lies on the foaming waves between us, and mist covers the jewels of Calacirya for ever.
Now lost, lost to those from the East is Valimar! Farewell! Maybe thou shalt find Valimar.
Maybe even thou shalt find it. Farewell!

cry snif! such an awesome poem, snif!

Originally posted by Fëanor
Ah! like gold fall the leaves in the wind, long years numberless as the wings of trees!
The years have passed like swift draughts of the sweet mead in lofty halls beyond the West, beneath the blue vaults of Varda wherein the stars tremble in the song of her voice, holy and queenly.
Who now shall refill the cup for me?
For now the Kindler, Varda, the Queen of the Stars, from Mount Everwhite has uplifted her hands like clouds, and all paths are drowned deep in shadow; and out of a grey country darkness lies on the foaming waves between us, and mist covers the jewels of Calacirya for ever.
Now lost, lost to those from the East is Valimar! Farewell! Maybe thou shalt find Valimar.
Maybe even thou shalt find it. Farewell!

cry snif! such an awesome poem, snif!

whats that from??

your poem

make it rhyme and flow better

also use a better vocabulary 😎 😎

but is good 😄

can you read mine and give feedback