My friend's problem

My friend has a problem. I just found out she takes a pair of scissors and cuts her arms whenever shes mad to punish herself. My friends and i try to stop her but she just keeps on doing it. We've talked to her but this has become a habit. She hurts herself cuz shes miserable and cuz shes angry. I love my friend and i tried to make her feel better. I just found out this afternoon at my other friend's party. Her best friends and i have tried to get her to stop but she just wont! I dont know what else to do. So please help me. Is there any possible ay i can stop her from doing this in the future? I love her, shes one of my best friend. So is there any way i can persuade her not to?

sorry there is nothing you can do. she needs professional help.

alot of my friends do it and its addictive but you should try to make her feel as happy as possible so she wont feel the need to do it i dont think she'll want proffessional help but you could try

How old is she? Is she a goth?

A lot of gothics/teenagers do it for attention and because they think it makes them interesting, dark, mysterious or unique, chances are she'll grow out of it.

Dude, you could bang her so easily. She needs some attention and a father figure....I'll lose so much respect for you if you don't bang her.

Originally posted by Arabian Knight
Dude, you could bang her so easily. She needs some attention and a father figure....I'll lose so much respect for you if you don't bang her.

another idiotic troll post. i look forward to your inevitable banning ✅

anyway, this chick has problems that you cant solve. she needs to seek professional help and/or get out of whatever situation is leading to this behavior.

backfire i strongly disagree about attention seeking. just because so many goths do this shit doesnt make the trend to be the cause, but rather the symptom. this behavior usually starts long before any such trend is adopted, but rather they find a social group with other people on the same boat.

with that said, there IS a certain mystique or rather some sense of coolness among these groups which seems to support this shit. a sort of pride is found in it by many, kinda like a ghetto thug taking pride in being shot and doing time.

so yes, the culture does not help at all, but whats the alternative besides complete isolation? hardly a solution. damned if they do damned if they dont.

but anyway, yeah dont tap that. she's damaged goods. maybe someday she'll come out of her hole and find a better and healthy life, but right now the only one who should be snooping around inside her psyche is someone with a p.h.d.
thats my advice and imho the best there is. take it or leave it.

Originally posted by BackFire
How old is she? Is she a goth?

A lot of gothics/teenagers do it for attention and because they think it makes them interesting, dark, mysterious or unique, chances are she'll grow out of it.

Originally posted by PVS
another idiotic troll post. i look forward to your inevitable banning ✅

anyway, this chick has problems that you cant solve. she needs to seek professional help and/or get out of whatever situation is leading to this behavior.

backfire i strongly disagree about attention seeking. just because so many goths do this shit doesnt make the trend to be the cause, but rather the symptom. this behavior usually starts long before any such trend is adopted, but rather they find a social group with other people on the same boat.

with that said, there IS a certain mystique or rather some sense of coolness among these groups which seems to support this shit. a sort of pride is found in it by many, kinda like a ghetto thug taking pride in being shot and doing time.

so yes, the culture does not help at all, but whats the alternative besides complete isolation? hardly a solution. damned if they do damned if they dont.

but anyway, yeah dont tap that. she's damaged goods. maybe someday she'll come out of her hole and find a better and healthy life, but right now the only one who should be snooping around inside her psyche is someone with a p.h.d.
thats my advice and imho the best there is. take it or leave it.

You shouldn't follow me around so much, it's a bit pathetic. I understand your need to try and take pot shots after someone posts, in hopes they won't read it and fire back, exposing your low intelligence and cowardess in the process, but this is rediculous.

Grow up little man.

Originally posted by DrDoom101
shes not gothic. Shes a great person. Shes my best friend. Shes always so cheerful. Shes always laughing. She said she was cutting her arm because her other best friend pissed her off or something like that, i didnt wanna be nosy so i didnt ask.

there is more to it than that.
could be abuse at home, could be clinical depression...whatever the case
from your post you really seem to care about her, so the best thing to do is talk her into seeking help. assure her its not because anyone thinks she's crazy, but rather she'd be better off explaining her problems with somene who can really help her sort them out. she'll probably make every excuse to not go, but be persistant, trying not to be a nag but rather always expressing that you care. the more friends that can help, the better. just remain loving and supportive, and hopefully she'll listen to reason and get help.

Try and talk to your friend...she needs to see someone to get help. If she denies there's a problem, then talk to someone - a parent or teacher that you trust.

thanks, guys. cry I just really want what's best for her. and im pretty sure banging her is not the answer, Arabian Knight. Im gonna try to talk to her one more time. I cant believe she does this. Shes always been such a great friend. Shes so happy and joyful but now i just found out. I heard she does this for some time now. I love her and im willing to do whatever it takes.

Good luck 🙂

Chances are she's going to deny there being a problem, and if you do have to go to someone else, she might be mad at you at first....but she'll realize that you did it because you cared for her. Good luck and I hope that she's okay.

Thanks, Lana. cry

Again, how old is she?

If she's a teenager then you really shouldn't worry, normal, confused, teenage behavior.

Originally posted by BackFire
Again, how old is she?

If she's a teenager then you really shouldn't worry, normal, confused, teenage behavior.

angst and depression, yes. self mutilation, no.

Most teenagers who do this stuff don't keep doing it, they grow out of their angst and no longer find self mutilation to be a viable "solution" to their depression.

Self mutilation isn't uncommon for teens, anyways. Again, pretty normal teen behavior.

Originally posted by BackFire
Most teenagers who do this stuff don't keep doing it, they grow out of their angst and no longer find self mutilation to be a viable "solution" to their depression.

Self mutilation isn't uncommon for teens, anyways. Again, pretty normal teen behavior.

only kids i ever knew when i was young who cut themselves were f***** up for one reason or another. just because they eventually stop doesnt mean they "grew out" of it, and certainly doesnt mean they are cured of any problems. i think you are blindly overgeneralising here dude.

No, actually, it really isn't. And people don't always grow out of it.

One easy way to tell who is really doing it due to true depression and who's doing it because they think it's 'trendy' -- how much attention they call to it. Someone who really is depressed with very rarely call any attention to that fact or talk about it much, while those who are faking for attention will talk about it all the time. It's a generalization, I know, but it's one that I know to be true a large majority of the time, both from experience and observation.

DrDoom -- no problem. You need any help with this, PM me and I'll give whatever advice I can (having been in your situation before).

Originally posted by Lana
how much attention they call to it.

ahh yes this is true. but really those idiots will only have like one or two cuts and show them to EVERYBODY. "hi, this is my cut, and my name is _____"

but from what this kid is saying about her personallity, i doubt this is the case.

Originally posted by PVS
ahh yes this is true. but really those idiots will only have like one or two cuts and show them to EVERYBODY. "hi, this is my cut, and my name is _____"

but from what this kid is saying about her personallity, i doubt this is the case.

Exactly my point.