SM's Poetry..

Originally posted by Coldfire
I thought it was good too 😊 However, one area slightly confused me:

I'll die alone,
But not for you.
The aches I feel,
In every bone,
Is bringing me down.

Should it not be

"The ache I feel,
In every bone,
Is bringing me down."

or

"The aches I feel,
In every bone,
Are bringing me down." ??

The main point is, the aches he feels in every bone from his suffering or torcher are weakening him of energy, thus it being hard to stay up, and thus it should've been the second one. Mearly a typo. As I said, it's not much, and school work is knocking me off concentration..😬

Originally posted by Spawn_Master
The answer is simple, my lady..

The main point is, the aches he feels in every bone from his suffering or torcher are weakening him of energy, thus it being hard to stay up, and thus it should've been the second one. Mearly a typo. As I said, it's not much, and school work is knocking me off concentration..😬

Originally posted by Coldfire
Sorry for getting all in your face about it 😮 I thought it was the second one, but I just wanted to be sure... I shouldn't talk, considering I do that myself all the time... 😖

Alright..here's my new one..

Walk Away

If you could walk away,
What would I would do?
Stand there and weep,
Or follow your path?
I can't keep up,
With everything changing,
In my life.

With everything I say,
You despise and defuse me.
If I could turn back the years,
Of my life,
I would learn from my mistakes,
And make them all better.

So think of these words,
As I speak them to you.
If you could walk away,
What would I do?
For now I am,
The mess you made,
And left for me,
To clean up myself.

And when we meet for the finale
We could conquer our fears,
And take that final stretch,
Into humanity.
So learn to forgive me,
So I can remember,
The reason you left me,
And turn it around.

If you could walk away....
What would I do?

Originally posted by Spawn_Master
Ha, don't worry about it.. 😉 😛

Nice 😊

Originally posted by Coldfire
lol alrighty 😛

Nice 😊

Originally posted by Spawn_Master
Thanks 😊

Yep, more will be posted soon..

I'm almost finished one..It took awhile for me to find the right words and such form this poem..

Originally posted by Spawn_Master
Yep, more will be posted soon..

I'm almost finished one..It took awhile for me to find the right words and such form this poem..

Well, I think I'm ready to post this one..

Beautiful Flower

My Beautiful Flower,
You sprout out into the world,
Like a seedling from the soil,
In the wake of the harsh weather,
The sun cannot find it's way through to you.

Withering and dieing before the Earth,
Nothing in the world shows respect,
For a harmless creature like you.
No one will hold you,
When you cry out for help,
Only I will be there for you,
When others bring you down.

When I try to pull out,
You pull me back in,
Though my life comes to an end,
I wonder if I'll see you again.

Beautiful Flower,
You show me the strength,
To stay alive.

My Beautiful Flower

There it is..It probably woulda been better if I wasn't studying so much for my exams, but, I hope you like it.. 😛

That one's so good. 😱 I love it! Good job 😄

I really enjoyed making this one, It gave me some more ideas for a next Poem..😊

I can't wait for your next one. 😄

Well, It'l take a little bit, I'm still thinking of what my next flavor will be.. 😛 😉

Originally posted by Spawn_Master
Well, I think I'm ready to post this one..

Beautiful Flower

My Beautiful Flower,
You sprout out into the world,
Like a seedling from the soil,
In the wake of the harsh weather,
The sun cannot find it's way through to you.

Withering and dieing before the Earth,
Nothing in the world shows respect,
For a harmless creature like you.
No one will hold you,
When you cry out for help,
Only I will be there for you,
When others bring you down.

When I try to pull out,
You pull me back in,
Though my life comes to an end,
I wonder if I'll see you again.

Beautiful Flower,
You show me the strength,
To stay alive.

My Beautiful Flower

There it is..It probably woulda been better if I wasn't studying so much for my exams, but, I hope you like it.. 😛

Originally posted by Spawn_Master
Well, It'l take a little bit, I'm still thinking of what my next flavor will be.. 😛 😉

I'm trying..GAAH.. 😆

I'm sorry to announce that my poetry will be delayed for awhile..

I will be in New York for a week, but I should be back to writing poetry soon..😬

Originally posted by Spawn_Master
I'm trying..GAAH.. 😆

Originally posted by Spawn_Master
I'm sorry to announce that my poetry will be delayed for awhile..

I will be in New York for a week, but I should be back to writing poetry soon..😬

It will be back once I return.

I'm not leaving until the 21st, but I'm packing now and planning out my schedule..

1. Jazz Cafe's droolio

2. Not decided yet 😛

Originally posted by Spawn_Master
It will be back once I return.

I'm not leaving until the 21st, but I'm packing now and planning out my schedule..

1. Jazz Cafe's droolio

2. Not decided yet 😛