The Battle Bar, Our Wretched Hive of Scum and Villainy

Started by Dr McBeefington3,287 pages

You've seen how much Manning has improved throwing under pressure. It seems the only way to stop him is to sack him. The Saints D was not that impressive today and I believe the offensive line of the Colts are bigger than the Saints D-line.

I was reading the first book in the Thrawn Trilogy today and I was stuck by something amazing.

I couldn't figure out why Thrawn was impressive. Supposedly Thrawn is a badass strategist, but in the opening scene of the first book we are treated to a battle between Thrawn and some New Republic chumps.

Well Thrawn apparently knows jack shit about space, because instead of pulling off something intelligent, like attacking his enemies from "above" (Space being omnidirectional) or building momentum and then cutting his engines (no inertia in space) so he could divert power to the weapons. Instead what does he do?

We are treated to something called the Marg Sabol maneuver (Zhan doesn't tell us what it is) that Thrawn somehow knows will work against the New Republic commander because apparently this New Republic commander's race is psychologically incapable of defending against this Marg Sabol maneuver.

Thrawn knows this because he looked at some of the species artwork.

WTF is this shit? Do Star Wars authors not know how to write convincing space tactics? Timothy Zhan can't go and do some basic research on theoretical space combat? I was expecting some kind of tactical genius not some psychological bullshit so far fetched it forced a suspension of disbelief.

Goddamn, I don't even remember that. I'll have to go rent them again.

Star Wars suffers from Chronic Telling Syndrome.

We are "told" that something is a certain way. We are "told" that a particular character can do something.

We are rarely shown anything.

It's true. I have the original novel trilogy and the graphic novel and in each one he decribes (at some point) "By looking at this species art work and the change of style to and fro you can see their weakness" I was like, wtf?

EDIT- Pulled from our trusted Wookiepedia

"The precise application of intelligence allowed Thrawn to win countless victories over numerically superior forces. Thrawn believed that one could understand the psychological and tactical limitations of one's adversaries through the examination of their art, and thus exploit their weaknesses. This conviction was often proven correct since his vast knowledge and obsession with the analytical study of art resulted in almost infallible strategic victories over nearly every opponent Thrawn engaged. Thrawn had a large holographic collection of art, although he also possessed few real artifacts, including Killik Twilight, a set of Mandalorian armor which he wore on his mission to Corellia, and, according to rumor, General Grievous's mask. He also had a statue made by a certain species, which were totally wiped out by his forces—it was the only case when Thrawn had knowledge of a particular species' art and was not able to create a proper tactic to defeat them without total annihilation. "

and THAT is what made thrawn so dangerous. He didn't use tactics, he used a superior understanding of the species. We know that if we stick a rat in a cage with a piece of electrified cheese (is that even possible?) that rat will CONTINUE to try to take that piece of cheese every few hours, no matter how many shocks it gives him.

All species were like rats to thrawn.

And its still utterly stupid, sentient species are not rats. The amount of inductive assumptions he would have to make is inane. Not to mention that sentient species aren't homogenus, variances in personality will exist.

If the book had any realism, Thrawn would have been a moron for making the blind assumption that he did based on the enemy commander's species.

autokrat ive been barking up the "why doesnt anyone in star wars have a realistic sense of tactics" tree for a long time 😐

see page 494 for details. 😐

I'd love to see Thrawn try and deduce Earth's weaknesses based on a few paintings he picked up from the Louvre. Anyone ever notice how in a lot of Sci-Fi, every planet and/or civilization is united under one banner? Why doesn't Naboo have 230 countries?

Originally posted by Lord Lucien
I'd love to see Thrawn try and deduce Earth's weaknesses based on a few paintings he picked up from the Louvre. Anyone ever notice how in a lot of Sci-Fi, every planet and/or civilization is united under one banner? Why doesn't Naboo have 230 countries?
It does, Naboo and Under-Naboo. That's because there planet becomes a 'country' and the universe is their world.

Originally posted by Lord Lucien
I'd love to see Thrawn try and deduce Earth's weaknesses based on a few paintings he picked up from the Louvre. Anyone ever notice how in a lot of Sci-Fi, every planet and/or civilization is united under one banner? Why doesn't Naboo have 230 countries?

Behold: Planetville

Originally posted by Autokrat
Behold: Planetville
Halo got a 👆 basically from that. I'm happy.

I have decided the posters at TheForce.net are among the dumbest I've ever met.

Its like they operate on a different level of existence that doesn't make any sense.

EDIT - Ok, thats a generalization, but seriously most of them are such hardcore SW fanbois that argue ceaselessly against the holes in SW.

Like you, Lucien, and DS?

Burrrrrrn!

Spoiler:
Taken just from this page
Originally posted by mattatom
Like you, Lucien, and DS?

*In a raging Anakin voice*

I hate you!

Originally posted by Autokrat
*In a raging Anakin voice*

I hate you!

That's very adulterous of you, comrade.

Originally posted by Red Nemesis
That's very adulterous of you, comrade.

Was this supposed to have some kind of implied meaning? If it was, it went completely over my head.

It was a quote from the hit TV series, "The Simpsons."

Faux News was on. I think it was when Homer ran for office as the Safety Salamander?