Originally posted by Ronny
DAmn poopy ruined my game.So you think Kevin Smith is sexy do you flirt
KS is teh shit. I've talked to him. flirt
Originally posted by Ronny
I know a guy who knows a guy maybe I can get you a prolonged limo ride with locked doors and handcuffs.But I'd have to humiliate you first by taking your virginity and selling the tape to paris hilton
hmm
I'll do it! droolio
Indecisive Video Customer: I don't think your manager would appreciate...
Randal Graves: I don't appreciate your ruse, ma'am.
Indecisive Video Customer: I beg your pardon?
Randal Graves: Your ruse. Your cunning attempt to trick me.
Indecisive Video Customer: I was only pointing out that you weren't paying any attention to what I was saying!
Randal Graves: And I hope it feels good.
Indecisive Video Customer: You hope WHAT feels good?
Randal Graves: I hope it feels so good to be right. There's nothing more exhilarating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there?
Indecisive Video Customer: Well, this is the last time I rent here.
Randal Graves: You'll be missed.
Indecisive Video Customer: Screw you!
[leaves]
Randal Graves: Hey! You're not allowed to rent here anymore!
Jay: Yeah!
13
Originally posted by Rölandclerks droolio
Indecisive Video Customer: I don't think your manager would appreciate...Randal Graves: I don't appreciate your ruse, ma'am.
Indecisive Video Customer: I beg your pardon?
Randal Graves: Your ruse. Your cunning attempt to trick me.
Indecisive Video Customer: I was only pointing out that you weren't paying any attention to what I was saying!
Randal Graves: And I hope it feels good.
Indecisive Video Customer: You hope WHAT feels good?
Randal Graves: I hope it feels so good to be right. There's nothing more exhilarating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there?
Indecisive Video Customer: Well, this is the last time I rent here.
Randal Graves: You'll be missed.
Indecisive Video Customer: Screw you!
[leaves]Randal Graves: Hey! You're not allowed to rent here anymore!
Jay: Yeah!
13
I feel good today, Silent Bob, we're gonna make some money, then you know what we're going to do? We're gonna go to that party, and we're gonna get some pussy, and I'm gonna **** this *****, and **** this *****, I'll **** ANYTHING THAT MOVES! What the **** you lookin at, I'll kick yo ****in ass! Shit yeah. Doesn't that ****er owe me 10 bucks? You know, ****in tonight, we're gonna rip off that ****er's head, and take out his ****in' SOUL. Hey, what's up baby, what's up, sluts? 💃
Originally posted by Rölandclerks droolio
Indecisive Video Customer: I don't think your manager would appreciate...Randal Graves: I don't appreciate your ruse, ma'am.
Indecisive Video Customer: I beg your pardon?
Randal Graves: Your ruse. Your cunning attempt to trick me.
Indecisive Video Customer: I was only pointing out that you weren't paying any attention to what I was saying!
Randal Graves: And I hope it feels good.
Indecisive Video Customer: You hope WHAT feels good?
Randal Graves: I hope it feels so good to be right. There's nothing more exhilarating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there?
Indecisive Video Customer: Well, this is the last time I rent here.
Randal Graves: You'll be missed.
Indecisive Video Customer: Screw you!
[leaves]Randal Graves: Hey! You're not allowed to rent here anymore!
Jay: Yeah!
13
I feel good today, Silent Bob, we're gonna make some money, then you know what we're going to do? We're gonna go to that party, and we're gonna get some pussy, and I'm gonna **** this *****, and **** this *****, I'll **** ANYTHING THAT MOVES! What the **** you lookin at, I'll kick yo ****in ass! Shit yeah. Doesn't that ****er owe me 10 bucks? You know, ****in tonight, we're gonna rip off that ****er's head, and take out his ****in' SOUL. Hey, what's up baby, what's up, sluts? 💃
RANDAL
You know what else I noticed in Jedi?
48.
DANTE
There's more?
RANDAL
So they build another Death Star,
right?
DANTE
Yeah.
RANDAL
Now the first one they built was
completed and fully operational
before the Rebels destroyed it.
DANTE
Luke blew it up. Give credit where
it's due.
RANDAL
And the second one was still being
built when they blew it up.
DANTE
Compliments of Lando Calrissian.
RANDAL
Something just never sat right with
me the second time they destroyed
it. I could never put my finger on
it-something just wasn't right.
DANTE
And you figured it out?
RANDAL
Well, the thing is, the first Death
Star was manned by the Imperial
army-storm troopers, dignitaries-
the only people onboard were
Imperials.
DANTE
Basically.
RANDAL
So when they blew it up, no prob.
Evil is punished.
DANTE
And the second time around...?
49.
RANDAL
The second time around, it wasn't
even finished yet. They were still
under construction.
DANTE
So?
RANDAL
A construction job of that magnitude
would require a helluva lot more
manpower than the Imperial army had
to offer. I'll bet there were
independent contractors working on
that thing: plumbers, aluminum
siders, roofers.
DANTE
Not just Imperials, is what you're
getting at.
RANDAL
Exactly. In order to get it built
quickly and quietly they'd hire
anybody who could do the job. Do
you think the average storm trooper
knows how to install a toilet main?
All they know is killing and white
uniforms.
DANTE
All right, so even if independent
contractors are working on the
Death Star, why are you uneasy with
its destruction?
RANDAL
All those innocent contractors
hired to do a job were killed-
casualties of a war they had
nothing to do with.
(notices Dante's confusion)
All right, look-you're a roofer,
and some juicy government contract
comes your way; you got the wife
and kids and the two-story in
suburbia-this is a government
contract, which means all sorts of
benefits. All of a sudden these
left-wing militants blast you with
lasers and wipe out everyone within
a three-mile radius.
(MORE)
50.
RANDAL (CONT'D)
You didn't ask for that. You have
no personal politics. You're just
trying to scrape out a living.
The BLUE-COLLAR MAN joins them.
BLUE-COLLAR MAN
Excuse me. I don't mean to
interrupt, but what were you
talking about?
RANDAL
The ending of Return of the Jedi.
DANTE
My friend is trying to convince me
that any contractors working on the
uncompleted Death Star were innocent
victims when the space station was
destroyed by the rebels.
BLUE-COLLAR MAN
Well, I'm a contractor myself. I'm
a roofer...
(digs into pocket and
produces business card)
Dunn and Reddy Home Improvements.
And speaking as a roofer, I can say
that a roofer's personal politics
come heavily into play when choosing
jobs.
RANDAL
Like when?
BLUE-COLLAR MAN
Three months ago I was offered a
job up in the hills. A beautiful
house with tons of property. It was
a simple reshingling job, but I was
told that if it was finished within
a day, my price would be doubled.
Then I realized whose house it was.
DANTE
Whose house was it?
BLUE-COLLAR MAN
Dominick Bambino's.
RANDAL
"Babyface" Bambino? The gangster?
51.
BLUE-COLLAR MAN
The same. The money was right, but
the risk was too big. I knew who he
was, and based on that, I passed
the job on to a friend of mine.
DANTE
Based on personal politics.
BLUE-COLLAR MAN
Right. And that week, the Foresci
family put a hit on Babyface's
house. My friend was shot and
killed. He wasn't even finished
shingling.
RANDAL
No way!
BLUE-COLLAR MAN
(paying for coffee)
I'm alive because I knew there were
risks involved taking on that
particular client. My friend wasn't
so lucky.
(pauses to reflect)
You know, any contractor willing to
work on that Death Star knew the
risks. If they were killed, it was
their own fault. A roofer listens
to this...
(taps his heart)
not his wallet.
Originally posted by Ronny
clerks droolioI feel good today, Silent Bob, we're gonna make some money, then you know what we're going to do? We're gonna go to that party, and we're gonna get some pussy, and I'm gonna **** this *****, and **** this *****, I'll **** ANYTHING THAT MOVES! What the **** you lookin at, I'll kick yo ****in ass! Shit yeah. Doesn't that ****er owe me 10 bucks? You know, ****in tonight, we're gonna rip off that ****er's head, and take out his ****in' SOUL. Hey, what's up baby, what's up, sluts? 💃
crylaugh
This one is the worst though.
Randal Graves: Okay, hang on, I'm on the phone with the distribution house now, lemme make sure we got it. What was it called again?
'Happy-Scrappy' Mom: Happy Scrappy Hero Pup.
'Happy-Scrappy' Kid: Happy Scrappy!
'Happy-Scrappy' Mom: She loves it.
Randal: Obviously. Yeah, hello, this is RST Video, customer number 4352, I need to place an order. Okay, I need one each of the following tapes: "Whispers in the Wind", "To Each His Own", "Put It Where It Doesn't Belong", "My Pipes Need Cleaning", "All T*t-F*cking Volume 8", "I Need Your C*ck", "Ass-Worshipping Rim-Jobbers", "My C*nt Needs Shafts", "Cum Clean", "Cum-Gargling Naked Sl*ts", "Cum Buns III", "Cumming in Socks", "Cum On Eileen", "Huge Black C*cks and Pearly White Cum", "Girls Who Crave C*ck", "Girls Who Crave C*nt", "Men Alone II: the KY Connection", "Pink P*ssy Lips", and, uh, oh yeah, "All Holes Filled with Hard C*ck". Uh-huh... yeah... Oh, wait, and, what was that called again?
I am sorry if that offended anyone but that is the funniest quote in the whole damn movie. 😂