Will you have lots of children?

Do you plan to have lots of children? If so, why?

Today, I was out and about, and decided to people watch while waiting on something. I observed 3 children, one toddler, one oldest child, and the middle one. The older kid was about 5 years old and seemed to push the middle one around. Well, the middle kid wanted attention from the older child, and the older one would shrugge her off, then the older one did something that really caught my attention even more, she stated (to her middle sister) in front of both parents "mommy is MY FRIEND and the baby is my friend, they are not your friends, and we don't belong to you". I was outraged, and looked for the parents response, they did nothing, the mother gave an embarrassing glance, the father just kept feeding the middle one sugar-drinks every time the older one pushed her away, and when the younger one would touch the baby, the older one would shun her away. I was like WOW, they are really setting up a strong middle child syndrome in this toddler.

Then, I wondered why people have kids knowing they will emotionally abuse at least one of them.

Will you all have kids, and if so, will it be 3 or more? 3 kids are tough, as one will always feel left out, usually the middle one. But sometimes, the middle one will learn the game and then align with another sibling and out caste the other, either way, one person is usually in the outs.

No plan for future children, I don't intend to burden my future wife with the agonizing pain of having to push a stork out of her you know what.

I fully intend to. I'm aiming for at least three. I get the easiest part, all I have to do is hold her hand...

Originally posted by Oncewhite
Do you plan to have lots of children? If so, why?

Today, I was out and about, and decided to people watch while waiting on something. I observed 3 children, one toddler, one oldest child, and the middle one. The older kid was about 5 years old and seemed to push the middle one around. Well, the middle kid wanted attention from the older child, and the older one would shrugge her off, then the older one did something that really caught my attention even more, she stated (to her middle sister) in front of both parents "mommy is MY FRIEND and the baby is my friend, they are not your friends, and we don't belong to you". I was outraged, and looked for the parents response, they did nothing, the mother gave an embarrassing glance, the father just kept feeding the middle one sugar-drinks every time the older one pushed her away, and when the younger one would touch the baby, the older one would shun her away. I was like WOW, they are really setting up a strong middle child syndrome in this toddler.

Then, I wondered why people have kids knowing they will emotionally abuse at least one of them.

Will you all have kids, and if so, will it be 3 or more? 3 kids are tough, as one will always feel left out, usually the middle one. But sometimes, the middle one will learn the game and then align with another sibling and out caste the other, either way, one person is usually in the outs.

Wow...is that actually proven, or do you just think that one is always left out?

Originally posted by Oncewhite
Then, I wondered why people have kids knowing they will emotionally abuse at least one of them.

And people call me a pessimist.

I guess the world would be a better place if people thought "Hmmm, we are going to emotionally abuse one of our children, so we best not take the risk and have none."

Granted, humanity would have died out long ago, but eh.

Today, I was out and about, and decided to people watch while waiting on something. I observed 3 children, one toddler, one oldest child, and the middle one. The older kid was about 5 years old and seemed to push the middle one around. Well, the middle kid wanted attention from the older child, and the older one would shrugge her off, then the older one did something that really caught my attention even more, she stated (to her middle sister) in front of both parents "mommy is MY FRIEND and the baby is my friend, they are not your friends, and we don't belong to you". I was outraged, and looked for the parents response, they did nothing, the mother gave an embarrassing glance, the father just kept feeding the middle one sugar-drinks every time the older one pushed her away, and when the younger one would touch the baby, the older one would shun her away. I was like WOW, they are really setting up a strong middle child syndrome in this toddler.

Kids are bastards, usually at some point, and by rights should grow out of it once their mental faculties start developing.. But they rarely seem to take such things to heart. I mean five years old? The malicious little tyke is like a mini-Hitler - middle age kid who must be, what, 2-4 will remember those words for the rest of its life and never be happy again.

Will you all have kids, and if so, will it be 3 or more? 3 kids are tough, as one will always feel left out, usually the middle one. But sometimes, the middle one will learn the game and then align with another sibling and out caste the other, either way, one person is usually in the outs.

I was one of five kids (2 boys, 3 girls), and I was the eldest (by a couple of years.) A lot of expectations seem to be placed on the eldest child. Anyway I can't actually say any of what you are describing really happened to any great extent.

Still having children isn't a great drive in my life, but I expect it will happen at some point, and to be honest I don't really want more then one, two at most (but then it isn't just my decision.)

we want 2 of them.

Originally posted by Bardock42
Wow...is that actually proven, or do you just think that one is always left out?

Hey Bradock42 (waves hello)....well, I can show you proof of the "middle child syndrome"

http://wvwv.essortment.com/whatismiddlec_rsoe.htm

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/14335112/ (under the theory of "birth order" there seems to be something about the middle child at times, but not always, as with everything in life, "always" is usually not "always" accurate).

"The middle or second born child or children often have the sense of not belonging. They fight to receive attention from parents and others because they feel many times they are being ignored or dubbed off as being the same as another sibling. Being in the middle a child can feel insecure. The middle child often lacks drive and looks for direction from the first born child. Sometimes a middle child feels out of place because they are not over achievers and like to go with the flow of things.

Being a middle child would mean they are loners. They really don’t like to latch on to a person in a relationship, there fore they have trouble keeping one due to lack of interest. Not liking to take the limelight for anything, they are not over achievers and just simply work enough work to get by, and typically that goes with school as well as a career. They are however very artistic and creative. If forced to use abilities they will work well, but do not work well under pressure. They often start several projects but rarely keep focused long enough to finish a project. The best career move for a middle child would be along the lines of using their creative. Going into a writing or journalism career, and into a career that they could freely express themselves would be good. Anything that would have hours that are flexible, and projects that frequently changed would be good for a middle born child. Since relationships are not of high importance to a middle child, often times they are alone. However, the best possible match for a middle child would be a last born. "

I want 3-4

Originally posted by Imperial_Samura
And people call me a pessimist.

Anyway I can't actually say any of what you are describing really happened to any great extent.

Yeah, the ones that don't recall what happend are the ones who usually cause(d) a lot of problems. 😛

I don't want children ermm 1 max.

Originally posted by Blaxican
I fully intend to. I'm aiming for at least three. I get the easiest part, all I have to do is hold her hand...

yeah, but wouldn't your wife (or girlfriend) have to approve of this? What if she has a hard time in labor, remember from the last post, babies that come from hard labor (if male) end up being gay....(don't get upset at me, please, it was based on some info I found online)..

Originally posted by Oncewhite
yeah, but wouldn't your wife (or girlfriend) have to approve of this? What if she has a hard time in labor, remember from the last post, babies that come from hard labor (if male) end up being gay....(don't get upset at me, please, it was based on some info I found online)..

Though not accurate information.

I'm an ******* who would rather spend my money on sports cars and vacations then kids.

If people are not worrying about some ridiculous 'precept' like 'the middle child syndrome', then they're worrying about something else.

Obviously, it is a parent's responsibility to protect their children from bullying and accusations of favoritism, but the best way of doing this is by instilling in them preventative behavioral beliefs. However, people should just get on with it; life is life, and putting stupid labels on everything is not going to change it.

I want the regular 2.4 children. The .4 kid will probably be called something weird like 'Puddlefloor'. No why.

Originally posted by Oncewhite
yeah, but wouldn't your wife (or girlfriend) have to approve of this? What if she has a hard time in labor, remember from the last post, babies that come from hard labor (if male) end up being gay....(don't get upset at me, please, it was based on some info I found online)..

A) Your info is false. I would just to like to point that out right now.

B) she would. She would have to approve of it before Marriage actually.

I was the oldest of 4 and only girl. The pecking order can be kinda cruel. The oldest is the "experimental" child. If they screw up with them then the parents have many more times to get it right. By the time the baby, last child, comes along. They've learned quite well. I say that some middle children kinda get pushed aside, not all though. It's just that parents are dealing with the older and much time is spent with the baby leaving the middle one to entertain themselves a bit more. Of course this isn't true in all families especially very large ones..........

Wish I was the youngest child, I would of gotten my college and car paid for...

Here, I'll play me a song. nopity

Originally posted by Oncewhite
Do you plan to have lots of children? If so, why?

Today, I was out and about, and decided to people watch while waiting on something. I observed 3 children, one toddler, one oldest child, and the middle one. The older kid was about 5 years old and seemed to push the middle one around. Well, the middle kid wanted attention from the older child, and the older one would shrugge her off, then the older one did something that really caught my attention even more, she stated (to her middle sister) in front of both parents "mommy is MY FRIEND and the baby is my friend, they are not your friends, and we don't belong to you". I was outraged, and looked for the parents response, they did nothing, the mother gave an embarrassing glance, the father just kept feeding the middle one sugar-drinks every time the older one pushed her away, and when the younger one would touch the baby, the older one would shun her away. I was like WOW, they are really setting up a strong middle child syndrome in this toddler.

Then, I wondered why people have kids knowing they will emotionally abuse at least one of them.

Will you all have kids, and if so, will it be 3 or more? 3 kids are tough, as one will always feel left out, usually the middle one. But sometimes, the middle one will learn the game and then align with another sibling and out caste the other, either way, one person is usually in the outs.

I have 3 sons, which is enough for me.

And to be honest, I think my middle has 'Middle Child Syndrome'. Even though my youngest is the 'outcast'.

I'd want 2 or 3

Originally posted by Blaxican
I fully intend to. I'm aiming for at least three. I get the easiest part, all I have to do is hold her hand...

Originally posted by Oncewhite
Yeah, the ones that don't recall what happend are the ones who usually cause(d) a lot of problems. 😛

Well, nice way to misunderstand - I didn't say "I can't recall/remember", I said what you are describing didn't happen to any great extent.

Kids fight - are there any that don't? However ones that maintain a consistent and sustained relationship of emotional abuse are far rarer then you make out. Ergo I used my own life experiences as an example of "3+ kids" who show no signs of having undergone "middle child syndrome."

Likewise it is sometimes assumed that some parents will have favorites - but once again this does not equate into anything that would constitutes actual emotional abuse.

I think you are overstating the theory and its supporting evidence. While it can exist it doesnt warrent:

"Then, I wondered why people have kids knowing they will emotionally abuse at least one of them."

I was the oldest of 4 and only girl. The pecking order can be kinda cruel. The oldest is the "experimental" child. If they screw up with them then the parents have many more times to get it right. By the time the baby, last child, comes along. They've learned quite well. I say that some middle children kinda get pushed aside, not all though. It's just that parents are dealing with the older and much time is spent with the baby leaving the middle one to entertain themselves a bit more. Of course this isn't true in all families especially very large ones..........

Wish I was the youngest child, I would of gotten my college and car paid for...

Here, I'll play me a song.

Kind of true. I was lucky - I can't say my parents messed up. However being the eldest, as well as being "far to serious" (something one of my teachers actually said once "While it's not a bad thing he can be far to serious"😉 meant I got given a lot of responsibility. Which wasn't so bad, since I am a responsible type.

yeah, but wouldn't your wife (or girlfriend) have to approve of this? What if she has a hard time in labor, remember from the last post, babies that come from hard labor (if male) end up being gay....(don't get upset at me, please, it was based on some info I found online)..

Where on earth did you get that claim? Babies from difficult births end up gay? What absurdness is this?

I can assure you that info is false. False... and stupid.