once, when i was like 15, i was beer drinking. it was the last weekend of beer season, and i had never drank a beer. my dad was like "ok, we have some beers left. if you see a big beer, chug her ass." well......it was getting dark, and out pops the biggest fattest beer i have ever seen. i raise my glass and pour the beer, drink the beer, and it goes down. perfect chugging posture. i was amazed i drank her, cuz it was like a three hundred liter beer, and she was foamy. well, i went down to drink more, poured it, and was like "yeah, i'm gonna drink your ass, byatch." then the beer looked at me......with those big beautiful eyes. she was actually crying and whimpering. ok, i was holding it together then. until her baby beers came out, oblivious to me, and started nudging her with their noses, they were like "hey, momm beer, lets go." man, i just collapsed and lost it. my dad and uncles and cousins rose up on their ATV's. my dad ran over, thinking i was hurt. seeing i was ok, he asked why i was crying. i was like " shebeercameoutandidrankherandehrbabiescameoverandshewasbeer
cryingWWWWAAAAHHHHH!!!!"
i have'nt touched a beer since. 😐