my new poems

Started by King of Blades24 pages

Forgive me Fëanor, you know my abilities as a wordsmith pale in comparison to you...

Originally posted by Fëanor I'm reminded of a sophomoric attempt at a blatant redemption for guilt without guile. Your words to express your thoughts and feelings feels trite and heavy handed, touched with insincerity that my brain rides in a tumultuous conundrum. Express yourself without expressing yourself with excess.

Originally posted by XvampbenjiiX666 thank you Lara and Scythe...umm i'm slow in the summer and i have no clue at what the Hell that guy was trying to tell me

He says your poem reminds him of a “youthful” (and I stretch that word) try at relieving some guilt ignorantly, or foolishly. Your attempt to express your emotions sounds corny and awkward, with hints of exaggeration (unless you know the term artificiality, from which the latter would be of better use), that my mind spins in trying to understand this chaotic story. Tell your story, but tell your story humbly.

Originally posted by Fëanor Then what would be the point of one submitting a prosaic verbal tirade if one is not wanting one's opinion whether it's for or against? If you expose yourself to the world in whatever way, then it is quite often that one must endure ridicule or accolades. And it doesn't matter if said submitter of verse wanted or required an opinion of one's work, it is there for those to opine an opinion. The saying goes: One does not become better when one only hears what they want to hear and if all they hear are: great job! awesome work! dude...you are by far...da bomb! Do you see where I'm going with this? So telling me to NOT read it, is like Michelangelo telling the people to NOT gawp at the Pieta, which to me is an incredible piece or work.

Originally posted by XvampbenjiiX666 ...

He’s asking why is it you submit your poems in the public. Any form of sharing opens itself up to the possibility of getting an opinion you don’t actually accept. But hence the bitter sweetness of the whole scenario. Some opinions are harsh so that you can get better. Because if every time you did something, right or wrong, well or terribly, and you got nothing but praise, you’d never become anything more. So in telling Fëanor to not read your poems is like Michelangelo telling the people not to look at the Pieta, which I agree with Fëanor, is an incredible piece of work.

To speak honestly I somewhat agree with Fëanor both about the criticism and in the defense. Don’t post anything if your not willing to hear the worst. Post for the worst, rejoice for everything better.

..i never said i didn't want criticism...

there is critisim and there is constructive critisim and I have to say that Feanor's post was not the latter!

if your going to critic work, be objective about it. dont just say you dont like it, say WHY you dont like it.

anyways art and literature is all about the "reaction" not the "opinion" what ever that reation may be, it is there, its free and its begging to be tapped wether is be shock, disgust, amazement or other wise.

I've never seen the Pieta. 😐

...i wonder if anyone else has to deal with this

what do you mean? 😕

Originally posted by XvampbenjiiX666
go burn in Hell

Wouldn't that be the place you want to go anyways? Shouldn't you, as satanist, rather say, go be happy in heaven, or something?

Originally posted by Lara
Bardy, play nice!!!!!
What? I just said I thought what Feanor said was funny.
Originally posted by Lara
😬yeah but there is no excuse for being an arse!
Technically I am sure there are loads of pretty good excuses for that.

Oh, and I also find the Pieta quite good.

Originally posted by Lara
what do you mean? 😕
...i'm not quite sure

Originally posted by Bardock42
Wouldn't that be the place you want to go anyways? Shouldn't you, as satanist, rather say, go be happy in heaven, or something?

What? I just said I thought what Feanor said was funny. Technically I am sure there are loads of pretty good excuses for that.

Oh, and I also find the Pieta quite good.

the whole heaven and Hell thing...no i would still tell you to burn in Hell

Originally posted by XvampbenjiiX666
the whole heaven and Hell thing...no i would still tell you to burn in Hell

Why do you say "would", you already did afterall.

Originally posted by Lara
I've never seen the Pieta. 😐

Viola, the Pieta

sorry it wouldn't let me make it a link bag

Originally posted by Bardock42
Why do you say "would", you already did afterall.
blah...

I prefer Rodin's work 😛 the gates of hell are amazing, I can believe he made those things out of cast bronze and they are over 10 foot high in stature!!! 😱

...im not into art unless i done it

Originally posted by XvampbenjiiX666
...im not into art unless i done it

Well that's rather ignorant 😬

...actually i like work done by goya, bosch and brueghel

Goya is rather plain for me, but I admire the simplicity of his works.

I like Bosch for his story telling ability in his panel works of art.

As for Brueghel, he has some really "big" pictures. His "Peasant Wedding" was in my high school history book. His art is good.

...alot of the work though was incredible, by all of them....

i'll have a new poem posted later today...its a love poem so its not gonna be as good. sorry

Kelsey's Poem

Every time we talk, a certain question pops into my head
i want to ask the question, but i think i'll wrie a poem instead

as i lay here listening to your voice, i can't help but to smile
i can always feel you next to me, even when we're seperated by many miles

your the only person i love with all my heart and the only i would die for
when you say 'i love you' my heart wants to rip out my chest and yell 'more'

your love is the cure that healed my darkened heart and hated soul
your heart saved me from falling into suicide's enternal black hole

so, will you take my hand and hold it with your enternal love
hold it after i'm sent to Hell and you sent to the starry above

here by my side, always within love's reach, will you forver stay
Kelsy, will you marry me and love me until your dying day?

(like i said, its a love poem and those things aren't easy for me)

Originally posted by XvampbenjiiX666
...im not into art unless i done it

Haha, well doesn't that just speak volumes?