A man goes into a pet shop and walks up to the counter. "Yes, sir, can I help you ?" asks the assistant. "I'd like a wasp, please", said the man. "You'd like a WHAT, sir ?" asks the assistant, looking puzzled. "I'd like a WASP, please", he repeats. "I'm sorry sir; we don't sell wasps in here." "Well, there's one in the window ..." An English tourist is on holiday in a Cornish village when he spots what is obviously the village idiot sitting next to the horse trough. In his hand is an old stick, and tied to the end is a piece of string which is dangling in the water. The tourist decides to humour the fellow and asks: "Have you caught anything yet?" The village idiot looks up and studies the stranger, before saying: "Aye, you be the seventh today."
An intrepid photographer went to a haunted castle determined to get a picture of a ghost which was said to appear only once in a hundred years. Not wanting to frighten off the ghost, the photographer sat in the dark until midnight when the apparition became visible. The ghost turned out to be friendly and consented to pose for one snapshot. The happy photographer popped a bulb into his camera and took the picture. After dashing into his studio, the photographer developed the negative and groaned. It was underexposed and completely blank. The spirit was willing, but the flash was weak.