Duels galore in the Star Wars RPs that Ush runs, and by association the spin-offs of his game that I run.
I too hate that "extension of" analogy. You hear it everywhere, not just in Star Wars. I know that it is meant to be taught that way and that it is meant to be used that way, but it is annoying and overused.
This story starts with Obi Wan Kenobi tellin Anakin Skywalker about his next mission.
Anakin: But Obi Wan I wanted to go to the Senate and get some power converters!!
Obi Wan: What the??
All of a sudden Emperor in training Palpatine calls the Jedi Temple..
Obi Wan: Hello. Thank you for calling the Jedi Order's Coruscant location. My name is Obi Wan Kenobi. How can I help you today??
Palpatine: Umm is Anakin there??
Obi Wan: Yes. May I ask who's calling?
Palpatine: Yea tell him it's "Sid". He'll know who it is.. ( childish giggle )
Obi Wan: Okay.. Hey Anakin you got a call.
Anakin: HI "SID"! ( childish giggle ) What's up dood??!!
Palpatine: I need you to come by my office. I need to "debrief" you..
Anakin with a shiver hangs up and for some odd reason decides to walk to the Senate.
Palpatine: Hey Anakin!
Anakin: Sup
Dooku: Wut it doo young Skywalker?
Anakin: Holy f/uck a duck!!
Palpatine: Calm down spazz. The time has come for you to take Christopher's place.
Dooku: Your out of character again, McDiarmid..
Palpatine: Oh my bad. Anyways yea you need to kill him because quite frankly he'd kick my ass in saber combat, my success as a Sith is strictly EU, and you have to do it to keep the plot in line.
Anakin: What are you talking about??
Dooku: He's doing what is known as "breaking the fourth wall" Christensen.
Anakin: Huh?
Dooku: God.. Fu/ck it. Let us duel!
Christopher Lee then uses his "awesome" and defies the laws of physics and old age and swiftly kicks Anakin across the room.
Anakin: That hurt old man!
Dooku: Get up you little brat. I wanna go back to England already..
Anakin: I don't wanna!
Yoda: Going on here, fu/ck the what is?
Palpatine: Oh shit we're dead..
Dooku: Piss off muppet!
Yoda: Ooohhh great warrior!
Obi Wan then walks into the room and flips his hair...
Obi Wan: Well hello there!
Palpatine: Dood what the f/cuk is with the reunion??
Windufield: I dare any one of you muthafu/ckaz to say "what" one more damn time!
Jabba: plooda ba donda hoba, Solo..
Windufield: Shut the fuc/k up fat man this isn't any of your damn business...
Obi Wan: Why is Pope Benedict here??
Palpatine: Shut up! I don't look like him! Something, something, something, ~Dark Side~!
Windufield: Enough is enough! I've had it with the muthafu/cin Siths on the muthafu/ckin senate!!
Palpatine: Well you know what they say..
Dooku: McDiarmid if your planning on doing what I think your doin, I'm going to take this Montecristo cigar and burn your vocal chords!
Palpatine: ~Sith happens~...
Darth Bane vs. Darth Krayt
Darth Krayt opened his eyes and slowly stood. The healing trance he had just come out of had left him feeling refreshed, even more so than usual. He felt ready to take on anything.
As he put on his helmet he felt a sudden surge in the Dark Side. Concerned by this he threw open the door of his meditation chamber and stepped out into the corridor. The scene that greeted him was of two of his Sith followers, a male Falleen and a female Bothan, lying dead, their necks snapped. Towering over them was a man, clearly their killer.
The man was tall and heavyset, dressed in black armour and robes with a curved lightsabre at his belt. The lights gleamed off his bald head and his face wore an expression of scorn. He radiated Dark-Side power.
The man glared at him “Another Sith pretender” he growled.
Krayt hadn’t recognised him at first because there were no orbalisks on him, but now he did so. “Lord Bane?”
That seemed to anger him further. “Feel the power of a true Sith!” He flung up his arms, unleashing a barrage of purple lightening from his fingertips.
Krayt was surprised, but he reacted in time to raise his hands and block the lightening. As Bane ceased his attack, the armoured Sith responded with his own blast of lightening. Bane caught it in his hands and turned it aside. Arcs of energy flickered over the wall for a second and then vanished.
Bane reached out and curled his hand into a fist as he sought to crush his foe’s neck the same way he had done with Qordis. Krayt felt the incoming telekinetic attack and called on the Force, using its power to shield himself. The other Sith was surprised but immediately masked it.
“So you do have some power after all” Bane admitted. “But that won’t save you.”
“Cease your attack and stand down” said Krayt firmly. “I am the Lord of the Sith now and I have survived threats you could not dream of.”
Bane laughed humourlessly. “You and your kind are a mockery of the Sith. That is why you must be destroyed.” He lit his lightsabre and charged.
Krayt ignited his dual blades in time to block the sequence of attacks. From his studies of both Jedi and Sith combat techniques he knew how to adjust his parries to counter the different angles of attack caused by the hook-handled weapon. Even so he was forced back by Bane’s assault. The other man was incredibly strong, both in the Force and physically, and his use of Form V capitalised on this to the full. Wielding two blades meant that Krayt couldn’t put his full weight behind his blocks, forcing him to give ground before his foe’s powerful blows.
Bane kept up his offence. His unfamiliarity with the two-handed fighting style was a problem, but as long as he kept the pretender from counterattacking, he was confident he could win.
But Darth Krayt was a veteran of the Clone Wars and a seasoned combatant. He stayed on the defensive, remaining calm and waiting for an opening to present itself. As Bane brought his weapon down in an overhead strike, Krayt whipped up both his lightsabres and crossed them to form an X, catching Bane’s lightsabre between the two crossed blades. Before he could disengage Krayt kicked him in the stomach. The blow forced him back several steps, giving Krayt enough space to go on the attack.
Now it was Bane who was driven back as he struggled to defend against the unfamiliar sequences. While not on the level of Kas’im, there was no denying that his opponent was an excellent swordsman. However he still had a trick up his sleeve…
Bane leaped backwards, using the Dark Side to propel himself through the air. At the same time he reached out through the Force.
The fight had carried them past the two weaklings he had slain earlier. Now as Krayt raced to attack again, Bane lifted the weapons of his beaten foes telekinetically into the air, ignited the blades and sent them hurtling towards his enemy’s armoured back.
Now pretender he thought. Fall before the weapons of the Dark Side, Cunning and deception.
But Krayt leaped to the side as if he anticipated the attack. At the same time he touched the flying lightsabres with the Force, adding his own power to their flight so that they accelerated.
The first lightsabre struck Bane in the shoulder. The second went right through his heart. He stood for a moment with a look of confusion on his face as if he wasn’t sure what had happened. Then his hook-handled weapon slipped from his fingers, the blade winking out, and he toppled over. He laid still, eyes fixed open.
Extinguishing his own lightsabres, Darth Krayt peered down at the body of his vanquished foe. By all rights he should have needed to return to the stasis chamber after that battle. Yet he felt strong, as if his foe’s passing had released a wealth of dark energy that left him reinvigorated.
Elation filled him. Today he had proven his legitimacy as a Sith Lord and the legitimacy of One Sith.
Originally posted by Nephthys
Darth Bane would kick Kraytsfmaggoty ass. Other than that, I liked it!
Thank you. I hope that you like this one as well:-
Maris Brood vs. Darth Maul
Since Darth Vader’s apprentice had spared her life, Maris Brood had been trying her hardest to turn away from the Dark Side of the Force. She sat cross-legged, attempting to meditate as Shaak Ti had taught her. It was not working. Despite her best efforts serenity eluded her.
An image came to her. In her mind’s eye she saw the rancor graveyard where she had fought the Apprentice.
She opened her eyes as the brief vision faded. She wasn’t sure what it meant but she felt sure that she needed to go there.
Maris looked around, taking in the sight. She closed her eyes briefly, a wave of guilt washing over her as she recalled taking Senator Organa hostage. He was right she thought unhappily. My master would be disgusted with me.
She sensed a sudden dark ripple in the Force and turned to see a form step out from behind a rancor skeleton. It was a Zabrak dressed in a black robe, gloves and boots. His face was covered in red and black tattoos and his eyes burned a fierce yellow.
She recognised him from the stories her master had told her of the Sith Lord that had killed Qui-Gonn Jinn. The name Darth Maul formed in her mind.
Darth Maul drew his lightsabre, a red blade emerging from either end. Maris drew her guard shotos and ignited them. She raised her weapons to ready stance, gripping them by the side handles so that the blades lay along each forearm.
Maul sprang forwards, striking at her with uncanny speed and ferocity. She fell back, using her weapons defensive cover to block his blows. She tried to counterattack and get in close where her guard shotos would be most be most effective, but he easily fended off her efforts.
Without warning Maul broke off his barrage of lightsabre strikes and kicked her in the stomach. She sailed backwards and hit the ground hard. As she lay gasping for breath Maul leaped into the air, spinning his weapon like a propeller.
Desperately she rolled to the side just in time as the scarlet blade sliced into the ground. Maris threw a leg sweep that sent Maul to the ground but he immediately rolled out of her striking range. Both of them flipped to their feet.
What are you waiting for? a voice seemed to whisper in the back of her mind. Call on the Dark Side. Use your fear and anger. It’s the only way to survive this.
No Maris, don’t! This time the voice was that of Shaak Ti. The recognition sent a thrill of joy through her.
She didn’t abandon me! Despite what I’ve done she hasn’t given up on me!
Her clarity renewed, Maris stood perfectly still as Maul slashed at her head. She blocked the blow with one shoto, striking simultaneously with the other one and flicking the blade out so that it extended past her fist. The blade sliced through Maul’s hilt and one blade shrank away.
Casting aside the severed half, Maul gripped his remaining weapon and attacked again. This time however, faced with the more familiar single blade, Maris was able to fight on more even footing. They fought around the graveyard, their blades flaring brightly as they clashed together.
Maul feinted a strike at Maris’s hip and then swept his blade up at her head. Letting the Force guide her, she moved out of the way and trapped her foe’s blade between both of her own. With a sudden twist she yanked it out of his grip and used the Force to send it hurtling away.
Before Maul could recover she stepped forwards and swept his ankles out. He toppled over and fell. Before he could get up, her crossed blades were at his throat. He looked up at her for a moment and then faded away.
Maris deactivated her guard shotos and stood up, feeling as if a weight had eased. “Thank you, master Shaak Ti” she whispered.
She turned and walked away, feeling more at ease than she had in a long time. She wasn’t completely rid of the Dark Side, but she was getting there.