Darth Jello
Cheese Spelunker
Some problems with the candidates already mentioned-
Guliani: Grossly unpopular with public servants. Police corruption charges. The fact that he spent up to $750,000 of 9/11 relief funds on his mistress and used a construction office at ground zero as a love nest.
Gingrich: Forgetting the whole wife stuff. He was charged with more ethics violations and fined more money than anyone in the history of the House of Representatives.
Romney: Put simply, even more so than Bill Clinton, Mitt Romney is the king of layoffs and job outsourcing.
Huckabey: He's got cushy Fox News job and his creepy connections to the Dominionist movement make a lot of people uncomfortable, especially since he doesn't keep it on the DL.
Paul: He is too closely associated with the GOA which itself is waaaay too comfortable with white supremacists. That and he seems to attract a lot of conspiracy theory survivalist extremist types that make people uncomfortable.
Santorum: Gee, where do we start? He defrauded tax payers out of money that he used for personal and family expenses, he hates gays and wants to push christian values down everyone's throat cause he doesn't think there is an inherent right to privacy. He slept with his stillborn child. Oh, and there's the fact that his name is a sexual slang term. You may as well elect representative Pearl Necklace.
Foxx: She is one of the death panel crazies. She voted against Katrina relief of any kind. She started a retirement account program that screwed soldiers and veterans out of their life savings as soon as the economy tanked. Oh, and she called Matthew Shepherd's murder a fraud to his mother's face on the House floor.
Bachmann: She is bat shit insane. She called for investigation and blacklisting of liberals and other unamericans. She is associated with the dominionist movement. She keeps quoting noted supporters of Hitler in order to make points (in a positive way). She called AmeriCorps a brainwashing paramilitary organization (despite her son joining a crew). She has spread myths and rumors about the current administration such as the conspiracy theory regarding the 2010 census and conservatives being shipped off to concentration camps despite the fact that REX 84 is an Oliver North contingency plan that no one other than a right wing loony would execute in its present state. She said that God willed her to be president. And she has been cited for inciting violence against the government and president of the United States.
Palin: She keeps posting insane shit and personal attacks on her facebook page. She has never completed a complete term in any office. She is involved in spreading false myths and rumors. She gave a resignation speech while obviously on something. And of course, she resigned as governor of Alaska to pursue a lucrative reality show contract for her and her family that was a tentative offer at best and was never finalized.