I was 16. Me, my dad ans his buddy King were driving around in a minivan. We were lost in downtown LA. My dad decided to ask some "chick" on the corner for directions. We stopped and right away I can see it's a tranny hooker. "She" gave him directions to the freeway, then started flirting with him. "She" asked him "Are you guys with the baseball convention?" My dad said "Yes we are, wanna step inside and hit a home run with my son?"
"She" was trying to open the door as we sped off. My dad and his buddy lol'd.
When I ran out of protein.
I had just gotten back from the gym and I was like: DAMN IT! I'VE GOT TO EAT SOMETHING WITH A BIO-AVAILABILITY OF 1 BEFORE MY 45 MINUTE NUTRIENT UPTAKE WINDOW IS OVER!!!!!
I was scared shitless. I then realized that I could drive up to the gas station that was less than 2 minutes away. (half a mile). I bought two muscle milks and chugged them. Then my nightmare was over.
Yes, this is a true story from the "amazing" life of dadudemon.
Originally posted by dadudemonYou shoulda done de bates and shot it in your mouth.
When I ran out of protein.I had just gotten back from the gym and I was like: DAMN IT! I'VE GOT TO EAT SOMETHING WITH A BIO-AVAILABILITY OF 1 BEFORE MY 45 MINUTE NUTRIENT UPTAKE WINDOW IS OVER!!!!!
I was scared shitless. I then realized that I could drive up to the gas station that was less than 2 minutes away. (half a mile). I bought two muscle milks and chugged them. Then my nightmare was over.
Yes, this is a true story from the "amazing" life of dadudemon.
i have two.
1) i was in tahoe at my female friend's family home.. she was hey, jay. i hear you are animal/nature friendly and have two wolves..
yea, i got two wolf dogs always had wolves.. my last one was a pure bred timber wolf..
ooh.. you'll like my wolves their in the cage outside. i also have a baby bear, i rescued him.. his mother was killed and we found him wondering the side of the road near its mother as a cub..
umm.. okay.. she opens her glass door which leads outside and her bear cub comes in and it wasnt small it was bigger then my wolf dogs.. it starts sniffing me and i was scared i sunk in into her seat trying to shrink myself..
she was all he doesnt bite but he some times doesnt listen thats what the wolves are for..
me: oohh mommy.( why does a rich white preppy girl have wild animals?) its gonna bite off my nads, its sniffing me!! ( i didnt yell i was thinking it i was too scared)
Originally posted by Wild Shadow
I have two:1) I was in Tahoe at a lady-friend's family home. She said, "hey, Jay, I hear you are animal/nature friendly and have two wolves."
"Yeah, I got two wolf dogs: always had wolves. My last one was a Timber Wolf."
"Oh, you'll like my wolves. They're in the cage outside. I also have a baby bear. I rescued him. His mother was killed and we found him, as a cub, wondering the side of the road near its dead mother."
"Umm...okay."
She opened her glass door - which leads outside - and her bear cub comes in. It wasn't small; t was bigger then my wolf dogs! It started sniffing me and I was scared. I sunk in into her seat trying to shrink myself."
She was all, "he doesn't bite, but he some times doesn't listen. That's what the wolves are for."
I said, "oh mommy!"
(Why does a white preppy girl have wild animals?)
Edited your post so it doesn't read so horribly. I left as much of the original text as possible.
Could you please start posting like that?
Please??????????
When everyone in my class wanted to fight a guy who was...way stronger than I was, was like...Ivan Drago vs Rocky, me being Rocky. Then there was college where these two guys were picking on my friend and tried starting on me and I stood up to him and him and his friend left me and my friend alone...saved that guys ass from a beat down
Originally posted by steverules_2
When everyone in my class wanted to fight a guy who was...way stronger than I was, was like...Ivan Drago vs Rocky, me being Rocky. Then there was college where these two guys were picking on my friend and tried starting on me and I stood up to him and him and his friend left me and my friend alone...saved that guys ass from a beat down
Luckily you were there to shave that guy's ass. That's what friends are for.
2nd) i was walking from a club after arguing with one of my friends.. i wasnt alone i was walking with another friend when we were pushed into an alley.
b4 us stood two giant 3oo lb toucans or Samoans bouncers..
i was like dudes, we aint looking for a fight just let us walk out of here no one needs to be hurt.. believe me it wont be me..flexed my muscles as i gauged their ability to be an actual threat to me.
they didnt respond i could hear jungle drums my heart and animal grunts, it was all in my head... they then positioned themselves to charge us.. and i swear at that moment i heard an elephant stampede and rhino snorting as they charged... i was frozen for a split second...
i was all this is going to hurt.. and my sphincter tighten as i was about to be tackled.. to lil to late cause i think i shat myself with the impact of the dude... stupid i was frozen in fear which allowed him to hit me...
Originally posted by Wild Shadow
2nd) i was walking from a club after arguing with one of my friends.. i wasnt alone i was walking with another friend when we were pushed into an alley.b4 us stood two giant 3oo lb toucans or Samoans bouncers..
i was like dudes, we aint looking for a fight just let us walk out of here no one needs to be hurt.. believe me it wont be me..flexed my muscles as i gauged their ability to be an actual threat to me.
they didnt respond i could hear jungle drums my heart and animal grunts, it was all in my head... they then positioned themselves to charge us.. and i swear at that moment i heard an elephant stampede and rhino snorting as they charged... i was frozen for a split second...
i was all this is going to hurt.. and my sphincter tighten as i was about to be tackled.. to lil to late cause i think i shat myself with the impact of the dude... stupid i was frozen in fear which allowed him to hit me...
This has to be a joke.
Please tell me you are joking.
no.. i made it funnier then it actually was to drive home the point.. but, it did happen. the fight lasted a good while.. club ppl were cheering us on as we were kicking @$$ b4 the cops showed up..
we were giving them a good @$$ whoopin but they wouldnt go down and i was becoming demoralized at the inevitability of our situation if we did not escalate our response.
Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
When I knocked Chuck Norris out. I thought I killed him and could only think of having to go to prison.
😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆
crylaugh crylaugh crylaugh crylaugh
Originally posted by steverules_2
Shave? But yeah it was pretty lucky
lol...yeah, you caught me. I used to do that shit to Gefallen Engal, alll the time...cracked me up.
But, yeah, you gotta stand up for your boy..else you're a shitty friend.
sometimes a friend needs to get beat up.. had one of those off and on friends that would come looking for you to protect him whenever he got in trouble even when he started the situation by stealing drugs, sleeping with the dudes sister or girlfriend, not payin ppl and they expect you to clean up their mess when they go after them.
let the dude get beat outside the bar alley..
@ ROGUE JEDI
pls stop trolling my threads or i will report you
Originally posted by Wild Shadow
@ ROGUE JEDIpls stop trolling my threads or i will report you
Dude, he's not trolling your threads. He's just crackin' jokes to get a laugh, as usual.
This is the Off the topic forum, he'll post shit that's off topic or humorous, just as you should.
Originally posted by Rogue Jedi
I feel that. One time I kicked the shit outta 1,758 Hells Angels just because they bad mouthed the Corp.
I would have used my gun katta on them...and only shot them in the knees.
Yeah, I'm that uber.
What would be scary is sitting in a bar filled with Hell's Angels and saying, "Harley's SUCK balls!"