bumping this:
- I have friends who have met their wives on dating sites.
- I have a profile on...maybe match.com? Anyway, it's of me in my Thor costume, and the whole profile is as if I'm Thor. Gotten a few hits. Been good for some lulz. There's pics in my profile.
- If you don't allow yourself to have a mental stigma, it's no different than meeting any other way. Because, let's be honest, very few meet-ups are super-romantic. The ability to do a little homework beforehand just means that you're probably saving yourself some time and money in dating. Because "I'd rather just meet" them argument seems odd to me. You do meet them. You just eliminate the obvious time-wasters beforehand. For many, meeting people "in the world" also comes with a lot of anxiety. Not a struggle I have, but it's a concern for many. The comfort of an internet site allows them to approach women more easily.
- Had some legit curiosity about these things at one point, mostly because I wanted to take all the sites' tests to see what they're actually testing for (and thereby to see to what extent I agreed with their match-making methodology). If you're creative, there's ways to set up dates on most sites without paying for anything. I actually hooked up with a girl from one of them, so it was pretty cool.
- Even per capita, it's mostly worthwhile only if you live in or near a city. The numbers dwindle to laughably small totals anywhere else. Certainly not worth a fee, or even the time it would take to set things up.
Originally posted by lord xyz
I tried Omegle and ended up with a 40yo paedophile sending me pictures of 15 year old girls.Still came. kinda
lol
Bad idea. Be patient and go for the real thing. People nowadays do things out of their emotions and that leads them the wrong way. You gotta treat these online dating sites like alcohol commercials, they want to make it attractive and have their viewers buy the product only to suffer in the end. The online dating is the same way, it looks attractive on the outside to everyone on that commercial getting dates but it's superficial,because that program gives you the date instead of you getting the date. It's a lost of genuinity on both sides. Best thing to do is pay your dues and go for it the natural way.
Originally posted by Astner
Only asocial losers without a shred of self esteem pay for services to meet other people. I mean I don't even hit on drunk girls for the same reason I don't play the Ninja Gaiden games on the normal difficulty setting, it's simply too easy.
Well, to be fair, you've got time, you are young and you are in a position to meet lots of single girls (or guys, not judging) in your day to day activities. You are obviously not the target audience of pay for dating website.
Originally posted by Astner
Only asocial losers without a shred of self esteem pay for services to meet other people.
This might have been partially true in the late 90s, but it's certainly not true now (only in the context of online dating).
You're a bit antiquated in your thinking.
Edit - the first gewgle search result:
http://www.askmen.com/dating/dating_advice/40_dating_tips.html
Originally posted by dadudemon
This might have been partially true in the late 90s, but it's certainly not true now (only in the context of online dating).
Originally posted by dadudemon
You're a bit antiquated in your thinking.Edit - the first gewgle search result:
http://www.askmen.com/dating/dating_advice/40_dating_tips.html
Online or offline... You have to have that connection.
Before my recent girlfriend I had a few others I dated that on paper should have worked. Great girls but I never could quite in into them. Currently my girlfriend is great. It's. Fun story of how we got together. Me chasing her then giving up. Then her chasing me when she realized I was moving on....
But you remove that surprise and spontaneous acts that occur in true dating. It gets filtered by the chat logs and I would think make it harder to get that physical attraction....
Course not everyone is like me. My gf says for example she lives my smell, my voice and my eyes. Can't figure out why but the girls I date love it when I look at them or talk or get close to smell me? Those kinds of things you can't get the same reaction off a video chat.
But if personality is really all you are looking for? Online is the worst place to find it. People front harder than they would in real life. It's amusing really. But you have to take these online dating sites with a grain of salt. Best luck to everyone in the game though. I'd hate to lose my gf and try my luck back out there.
Meeting someone new can be (sometimes) a new wracking experience.
Originally posted by Astner
No it isn't. It's not difficult to flirt with women and most women enjoy being flirted with. It isn't more difficult to socialize with people now then it was twenty years ago. If you're awkward enough to where you have to find a partner online then I have some troubling news regarding your social abilities--or lack thereof.You do know that those articles are written by professionals to advertise online dating sites, right? Besides, the fact that they have to explain that "it's not for losers" pretty much proves my point.
Originally posted by Barker
[b]Account Restricted [/B]
Too much emphasis on looks, would try it, but I really don't take a good picture, perhaps I need to go to an image consultant and touch up my features for a photo, but isn't that against what real relationships are, being authentic in every way? And if that scares people off then you know they were not the right one for you to be with.
I'll agree to one thing: online profiles are hilarious to read. Some are genuinely interesting, but a lot of it is just smh material. In general though, I think some of the criticism leveled at online dating here is unwarranted.
Originally posted by YankeeWhaler
Too much emphasis on looks, would try it, but I really don't take a good picture, perhaps I need to go to an image consultant and touch up my features for a photo, but isn't that against what real relationships are, being authentic in every way? And if that scares people off then you know they were not the right one for you to be with.
We lie a LOT. Most are harmless "white lies." Trying to be morally absolute about it does no good, everyone does it without even realizing it.
If you're being deliberately deceptive to get dates, then sure, that's bad. But it's not really what most people do.
Originally posted by Astner
Only asocial losers without a shred of self esteem pay for services to meet other people.
I know three people personally, as in not just facebook-friends, who met their long-term significant other and/or wife online. I've personally met girls both ways, irl and online. Neither has seemed better or worse. I'm confident in social settings, moderately good looking, but enjoy some of the options that online dating affords (though, regrettably, at a cost, which is what keeps me away from it).
For many though, it relates to the initial approach. Being casual and social is easy around people you're comfortable with, less so when approaching a woman you are attracted to but have never met. That form of anxiety affects many people of both genders, even ones that are otherwise socially comfortable. Also, If a man doesn't have social activities where he meets new women with any regularity, it can help. At one point, for example, I realized I only hung out with my friends, and wasn't meeting anyone new, so I made some changes socially, for example. Now I go dancing at least once a week...usually with some friends, but it's also a great way to meet new people. Fun, and it fulfills such romantic purposes. But online dating would have been another option.
So its appeal is twofold: a means of meeting new people for those who don't meet new people that often (and who aren't into walking up to strangers in bars), and a way around the initial meeting anxiety. The appeal is obvious, and it's not hard to see that none of that qualifies the person as some sort of social reject.
We also "pay" to get to know a girl, and there's lots of things with any of us that can be a red flag. So, maybe $15 a month, or 2-3 dates to find out the same information that's on an online profile page. Less intimate, sure, but chemistry comes in many forms and is never impossible for the creative...if you like each other, you'll get the dates eventually anyway. So the "pay" angle doesn't really hold up to scrutiny either.
Anyway, the whole "loser or not loser" argument is largely invalid. It's useful to those who will benefit from what it provides. The law of large numbers means that with any definition of "loser" it will appeal to and be useful to thousands if not millions of BOTH losers and non-losers (just like regular dating). That whole dualistic debate is largely just a media construct.
So, are you basing your opinion off of any kind of data or logic, or just social stereotypes?
srug
Originally posted by Digi
I'll agree to one thing: online profiles are hilarious to read. Some are genuinely interesting, but a lot of it is just smh material. In general though, I think some of the criticism leveled at online dating here is unwarranted.We lie a LOT. Most are harmless "white lies." Trying to be morally absolute about it does no good, everyone does it without even realizing it.
If you're being deliberately deceptive to get dates, then sure, that's bad. But it's not really what most people do.
I know three people personally, as in not just facebook-friends, who met their long-term significant other and/or wife online. I've personally met girls both ways, irl and online. Neither has seemed better or worse. I'm confident in social settings, moderately good looking, but enjoy some of the options that online dating affords (though, regrettably, at a cost, which is what keeps me away from it).
For many though, it relates to the initial approach. Being casual and social is easy around people you're comfortable with, less so when approaching a woman you are attracted to but have never met. That form of anxiety affects many people of both genders, even ones that are otherwise socially comfortable. Also, If a man doesn't have social activities where he meets new women with any regularity, it can help. At one point, for example, I realized I only hung out with my friends, and wasn't meeting anyone new, so I made some changes socially, for example. Now I go dancing at least once a week...usually with some friends, but it's also a great way to meet new people. Fun, and it fulfills such romantic purposes. But online dating would have been another option.
So its appeal is twofold: a means of meeting new people for those who don't meet new people that often (and who aren't into walking up to strangers in bars), and a way around the initial meeting anxiety. The appeal is obvious, and it's not hard to see that none of that qualifies the person as some sort of social reject.
We also "pay" to get to know a girl, and there's lots of things with any of us that can be a red flag. So, maybe $15 a month, or 2-3 dates to find out the same information that's on an online profile page. Less intimate, sure, but chemistry comes in many forms and is never impossible for the creative...if you like each other, you'll get the dates eventually anyway. So the "pay" angle doesn't really hold up to scrutiny either.
Anyway, the whole "loser or not loser" argument is largely invalid. It's useful to those who will benefit from what it provides. The law of large numbers means that with any definition of "loser" it will appeal to and be useful to thousands if not millions of BOTH losers and non-losers (just like regular dating). That whole dualistic debate is largely just a media construct.
So, are you basing your opinion off of any kind of data or logic, or just social stereotypes?
srug
Good point, unless you are out for just a one night stand or the occasional fling from time to time, the first few times you meet should not be about scoring. May take a handful of dates before the chemistry starts to heat up.
Originally posted by Kharhmah
I started talking to a guy online in September 2006, I think it was, then at the end of November he asked me if I wanted to be his girlfriend. I was a bit sceptical about it, seeing as he was the first person ever to show that kind of interest in me, but I said yes..And now he's sleeping in the next room as we speak. awesome
'twill be our 5th anniversary on the 28th of November. =3
Good for you!!!
Just uploaded a pic on my online profile after scanning my last photo badge ID from a place I worked at. Updated my profile to state the girls have to make fitness and good food choices a top priority, as the body is a shrine, not just a place to put junk food and be lazy.
And have to more than just a goal of doing wonders with a golf ball and a garden hose. Gotta be wanting to be somebody other than a 9 to 5 slug.