Originally posted by Colossus-Big C
You think its possible to be gay after having sex with a woman/seeing a hot woman naked?The warm, moist, intense arousing feeling and pleasure your penis feels inside of a vagina as you stroke in and out with a rock hard erection, Feeling her boobs rub against your chest while you both are naked ,the liquid dripping out her vagina onto your balls.
How the FACK can a sane person possibly go gay after that?
Originally posted by Oliver North
what, you mean my personal sexual experiences?ya, I'm going to pass on that depth of detail about my personal life, for both of our sake.
No I mean like your bi..your experences your journey must have been different then mine? How do you see relationships through your eyes? Do you prefer one over the other? (mind you, you dont have to give exact details)
Originally posted by Colossus-Big C
You think its possible to be gay after having sex with a woman/seeing a hot woman naked?The warm, moist, intense arousing feeling and pleasure your penis feels inside of a vagina as you stroke in and out with a rock hard erection, Feeling her boobs rub against your chest while you both are naked ,the liquid dripping out her vagina onto your balls.
How the FACK can a sane person possibly go gay after that?
I'm straight, but that was probably the least erotic description of heterosexual sex I've read in a long while.
Originally posted by rudester
No I mean like your bi..your experences your journey must have been different then mine? How do you see relationships through your eyes? Do you prefer one over the other? (mind you, you dont have to give exact details)
I don't tie my personal identity into my sexuality, so my journey is really, "wow, I really am turned on by dick, and by vagina, looks like I'm bisexual".
ummm, I have very little experience with homosexual sex, though lots of sort of gender bending role play... I think I'm more hetero than homo, but like I said earlier, I don't think those are actual categories of human cognition so much as they are labels people fall into for personal identity or cultural reasons. What I mean is, there are individuals I am attracted to, and those I am not. There are individual men who are far more attractive than are individual women, but on the whole, I'd say there are more individual women that I'd like to have sex with than individual men.
Though I'm currently in one, I'm actually not a big fan of relationships. I think they are, again, something culture imposes on people rather than a real expression of human desire. My current relationship is entirely open, and works incredibly well because of it, and we both know that in a couple of years we are going to have to break up because of going in different directions after our school is done. She'd hate for me to describe her this way, but we are both essentially Randian in our approach to it: We stick around because we get personal satisfaction from eachother, but we are free individuals who don't want to own or impose the other, so we voluntarily are still together, so far as we want to be.
The idea of a relationship with responsibilities and expectations to one another, the idea of ownership that seems ubiquitous in all relationships, we have no interest in these. We are both entirely self-motivated, and it would be silly for either of us to sort of submit to the other, lol, just because we like to be with eachother. Also, its the bullshit expectations that lead to the resentment, lying and eventual dissolution (or long term suffering if not dissolved) of most relationships. You can't be jealous if you don't think you own other people, you have no need to lie if your relationship is based on openness and trust without judgement.
lol, we are both (well, me almost) PhD students in cognitive psych, so it sort of makes sense to me that we would understand a bit about how to make relationships work in an objective manner, but don't let any social or clinical psychology people hear me say that.
I'm the opposite. I have a lot of experience with homosexual sex and little with hetro. I not only like guy packages but I like the emotional side to it as well. Role play is just jokes to me, I laugh when a guy ties me up but I go along with it.
I am a big fan of relationships, and I've been in open ones and it just didn't work out. Relationships aren't as heavy as you make them out to be.. just because one open relationship has more freedom and less rules it doesn't mean you have less of a responsibility. (you have to be more vigilant about safe sex)
Yes, relationshps are binding but thats what you want when your with someone you love and don't want to share with anyone else.. that's the whole point in a relationship, working together to achieve one common goal. (Protecting each other, keeping a promise) Now relationships are hard work, especially when you have a wondering eye, but they're not so much about rules as you put it; when your with someone you love things just fit right. You dont have to adjust your life with the one your suppose to be with because things just fall into place, it's a nice feeling having your best friend there with you always. Unfortunitly sometimes relationships run its course, I do agree with you on this one but sometimes like I said before you just meet someone where time stops and you know that your willing to go with them forever.
Originally posted by rudester
I am a big fan of relationships, and I've been in open ones and it just didn't work out. Relationships aren't as heavy as you make them out to be.. just because one open relationship has more freedom and less rules it doesn't mean you have less of a responsibility. (you have to be more vigilant about safe sex)
I don't get this weird obsession with safe sex you have... like, when do you think anybody, gay/straight/whatever, has the ability to not be extra vigilant about safe sex?
I may have overemphasized the responsibilities thing (though I don't think I did), but even then, this says nothing about the whole ownership part, which you explicitly endorse in the next paragraph. Why would you ever want to control something you love? That seems like the most absurd way to be friends with or to love someone, unless of course you buy into the socially constructed idea of what a relationship is, which it is clear you do.
Originally posted by rudester
Yes, relationshps are binding but thats what you want when your with someone you love and don't want to share with anyone else..
they aren't yours to share
Originally posted by rudester
that's the whole point in a relationship, working together to achieve one common goal. (Protecting each other, keeping a promise)
protecting? keeping promises?
did you get this from a Hallmark card?
the point of a relationship is that two people come together because there is a mutual benefit, be it a friendship or romantic relationship. What common goal? We are two people, two goals, by definition. If they overlap or if we wish to support the other's goal, great, but my life does not and should not be dramatically changed because I'm with someone. If you feel like you have to subvert your own will to meet the expectations of the person you are with, this is a bad relationship, period.
Originally posted by rudester
Now relationships are hard work,
if you are with someone you aren't compatible with, sure
otherwise that whole openness and lack of judgement goes a long way to solving most issues in a rational manner.
Originally posted by rudester
especially when you have a wondering eye,
wondering? lol
who has a wandering eye? you? you are trying to make the point to me about relationships being hard when it is you who has the inability to treat the person you-are-with with enough respect to be open with them about your behaviour.
Also, "wandering eye" is a cute way of saying chronic liar. So yes, relationships are hard when you are a chronic liar.
Originally posted by rudester
but they're not so much about rules as you put it; when your with someone you love things just fit right. You dont have to adjust your life with the one your suppose to be with because things just fall into place, it's a nice feeling having your best friend there with you always.
this is literally contradictory to what you said above about "one common goal"
so, fail
Originally posted by rudester
Unfortunitly sometimes relationships run its course, I do agree with you on this one but sometimes like I said before you just meet someone where time stops and you know that your willing to go with them forever.
this was the whole thing about me being a cognitive psychologist...
I'm not going to disagree on your points because that is your truth and what you believe to be true. (I just repeated myself)
I don't need self gratification to make myself feel better. But what I will tell you is, when you reach a certain point in your life and sex just doesn't cut it for you, then you pray; you pray that god or whatever you believe in would send you someone just for you.
Now that might be a little bit too romantic for you because I can tell your a serious guy.