I close my eyes,slowly slipping away
Can you feel me in the Force?
A sinking surrender,
Like a exhausted swimmer,
Drowning in a rising tide.
Slipping into Vaapad.
My eyes open once more,then close again
Only to give my enemy a slight nod,
barely a show of respect.
I open them again,
They smoked with darkness.
Exhaling deeply
Relaxing,drawing another deep breath
Only to repeat, I shed the burdens of a Jedi,
To reach a deeper more receptive state of mind,
transforming myself into a conduit, accepting his fury,
accepting his hatred,
Transforming into a superconducting loop,
Connecting his fury,his hatred,along my inner darkness and my tranquil fury.
Which passes in and out through me,
In which I channel back towards my enemy.
I completely give myself to Vaapad,
My enemy,stands light saber, ignited,
Feigning a single - handed low guard,with the blade
angled downward at his side.
He draws a rapid "X" in the air with his blade,
I mirror his reply whipping my blade in curving slashes,
creating a constant near- invisible weave of lethal energy
Which flowed one into next with liquid precision.
This is the ready stance of Vaapad.
He advanced.
His crimson blade whirred,mine whirred faster.
The dance have begun,
Blood thirsty red vs Dark as night black.
How many blades do you see?
Our blades met with a horrified clash!
It was if the blackness of my blade was quickly trying to extinguish
the bright blood red color of his lightsaber.
Again,our blades lock,neither giving way,
Neither taking their eyes off the other.
His feigned attempt of Makashi was only an illusion
To quickly switch to Djem So 's Falling Avalanche,
followed by a fluid riposte.
Mimicing the elegant foot work of Makashi,
I side stepped,left then right,evading both attacks.
And quickly followed through with several of Assured strikes
Which successfully ended with a lightsaber butt to his head
followed by a mark of contact,Shiim.
Scarring his left arm and right leg.
To be continued. At a later date.
__________________ "Happiness is a lie. Life is horror. The light is always dying all across the universe. The last star will flicker out someday, when it does, all that remains is shadow. And I will be its king!"'-Amahl Farouk
Honestly, if it weren't for the random mention of Jedi and lightsabers, I'd think this was a poem written about and dedicated to all the drugs you needed to write it.
Your criticism is noted.
I don't do drugs.
Nor do I criticise your respect threads.
If you didn't like it just say that,because I didn't write it for you.
Too many Jedi? There were only two.
Too many lightsabers? There were only two.
Unless you count the after images of Vaapad 's ready stance.
If I wrote about Revan, Darth Vader,or Luke Skywalker's style,
There would be no insults or no complaints.
Thank you to the guys that read it
If you didn't like it, you did it in a respectful way.
For you guys that said it was a shit poem.
Do me a favor write one better on this topic.
It don't have to be Vaapad vs Djem So.
Anything you want I challenge you to write one better.
If you're not scared,no reply just write a poem of your choosing.
Since this is still 3 against 1,and you're still bitter,I dare you to write one.
Again,thank you for your honest replies and criticism.
This won't stop my writings or replies.
The Great mistake is to anticipate the outcome of the engagement.
You ought not to be thinking whether it ends in victory or defeat.
Just let nature take its course and your tools will strike at the right moment.------ Bruce Lee.
Yeah, we don't have to be Grandmasters of Iambic Pentameter to criticize your poetry. The fact that we probably can't write poetry is exactly why we didn't try to and then post in online for everyone in the world to see and laugh at. That little bit of peer pressure at the end is nice though.
Your grasp of the English languages is so disgusting that it gave me leukemia. Let me spell this out for you in a way that even a small child should be able to understand.
1. I can't write poetry, so I don't. Fear has nothing to do with it.
2. You can't write poetry either, so you really shouldn't.
3. Peer pressure, you goddamn moron, is exactly what you call what you're doing right now. "Do it, unless you're scared," is peer pressure. The only thing odd, of course, is that I consider you my peer. You aren't.
little boy, I just asked you to write.
We know you can insult and say ignorant things without thinking.
Now you can't follow directions,too?
Ok since you feel pressured
I'm only gonna say this once.
If you can't be respectful to anything I write,don't commit.
don't leave no replies.
Because what you and your little boys are doing is harrassment.
I have no beef with yall.
All I asked yall to do is write? no reply just write.
Well,you to write.
That's not peer pressure,that's telling the world,that
1 you can't write
2 you can't follow directions
3 And the only thing yall know how to do on KMC is insult and disrespect people.
Did you not read the Forum's rules?
If you need help its right above this topic when you go back to the home page.
I'm a grown ass man, thanks. Contrary to whatever reality you live in, I don't have a leash. Criticizing you isn't harassment. No one has to write poems to judge you, and you throwing a ***** fit because no one likes your poetry won't change that. You don't get to set forum rules, so you saying, "write, well, don't comment if don't," won't make anyone have to. But I'll humor you with a haiku:
I clicked on this thread.
The poem in it was shit.
Tears won't ever change that.
If your're grown ass man then stop acting like a disrespectful little boy
who needs some approval before you commit.
I,too am a grown ass man.
What do you think the 34 is for?
I'll humor you right back,
I don't run with little boys
I don't play with other people's children.
I don't need drugs,a gun, or some lame ass pack of wanna be thugs and gangsters.
I'm a grown ass 38 yr old man who has more respect and more class that you lil boy.
Learn some manners and learn how to shut up when real men are talking.
I asked you nicely to not commit or reply to my topics.
Mr. Can't follow directions.
Did you read the rules on the home page?
Who wrote your haiku? you didn't.
You said you can't write a poem.
You did something right,you got somebody to write it for you.
last time stay off my topic.
You still small minded. grown ass men talk like men and respect each other.
Not insult and disrespect each other.
You're suppose to be a leader not a follower.
I forgot you're not a man,you're still a lii wet behind the ears lil boy
pretending to be a man.
Here's some advice pretender,man up and stop being so disrespectful and childish,real talk,
stop following what you see, cause you ain't bout that life,
I have seen it all and done it all,You ain't done nothing but pretend .
I can speak your language too,lil boy.
Who you think originated it?
Stay off my topics and stay away from me.