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Poetry Personified
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justjakk
Evil Bunny

Gender: Male
Location: In written pages

quote:
Originally posted by D-Double
Great job, JJ!! big grin
....Especially on "When you Crack". That perspective is dope...
I liked your take on "No longer Pure", too. Reminds me of some X-rated anime I saw...shifty...Just play'n. Nice work, dude.

I plan to post my version of "Vampyr" tomorrow.


Thank you. I was in an animation class supported by Warner Bros. for a little more than three years and one thing they taught us was camera angles. For When you crack i chose the high angle to show her on the floor and to be able to add objects on higher levels. The bow in her hair and the raggy bear on the bed is to refelct a time of innocence. Im glad you liked it. Also with Vampyr, i knew i wanted a pic of a dark presence on top of a headstone and the cross was just thrown in for good measure. The moon added to the background and slight up camera shot was what i think messed me up on this one. I think i may redo it. The poem seems so sad when he/she talks about not being able to be in the light of day and the pic i drew was of a evil grinning vamp so i may have to reacess myself once more. And last but not least "No longer pure". This one i wanted a female that had a youthfulness to her that would make you sad for her while at the same time invoking so much more from the male perspective. From the way the claws come up her leg and the blood coming back down, to the monsters tongue reaching to her face gives the picture a since of dread. The poem says it all "she dies" this is only ranking up to that point. Im glad ya'll liked my pictures. teeheeteehee


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Justjakk in the box altered images Justjakk in the box twisted lyrics

Old Post Nov 4th, 2004 09:24 AM
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justjakk
Evil Bunny

Gender: Male
Location: In written pages

Re: Vampyr

quote:
Originally posted by justjakk


Here is the redo. I think this actually grabs what i think was being said in the poem.

Attachment: vampyr2.jpg
This has been downloaded 130 time(s).


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Justjakk in the box altered images Justjakk in the box twisted lyrics

Old Post Nov 4th, 2004 08:58 PM
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Syren
dreaming

Gender: Female
Location: every which way but loose

That's a really good take on the poem but I have to admit that when writing it I was imagining a lone creature, perhaps walking down a silent street, hands in pockets and shoulders hunched against the wind, even though, theoretically, he feels no cold. The other picture I had in my mind was the same creature standing on the edge of a cliff, overlooking the sea, with the sun just rising above the horizon, perhaps alighting upon his feet....... I wish I had the means of posting pics, actually, I wish I had the ability to draw what I imagine rather than just write erm


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ThorinWoofer

Old Post Nov 4th, 2004 10:06 PM
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justjakk
Evil Bunny

Gender: Male
Location: In written pages

Im glad you like it/them.


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Justjakk in the box altered images Justjakk in the box twisted lyrics

Old Post Nov 4th, 2004 10:09 PM
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Syren
dreaming

Gender: Female
Location: every which way but loose

Daddy...
Why’d you have to leave me?
Why couldn’t you stay alive to see
What I have become for you?
You’ve been with me all the way through
But now you’re gone
To the Underworld you have flown...

Daddy...
Why can’t we return the days
When we used to laugh and play?
We’d swirl around the bend
I prayed to God it would never end.
Now I have my restless nights
Without you there to remind me of the light

Daddy...
I wish you were alive now
Maybe I would not be so down
Now all my fears seem so near
Sometimes I can’t even see you clear
You are there in my dreams
But I always seem to return to reality

Daddy...
I know that you’re with me in my heart
And that’s what keeps me on day and night
But I would like to say, Daddy,
That I have met some awfully nice friends
And our loyalty has no ends

So Daddy...
I miss you still
And you always have a special spot to fill
In my heart and in my mind
But now I think I can move on fine
But I will always remember the night
When you reminded me of the light....


Written by Ash


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ThorinWoofer

Old Post Nov 4th, 2004 10:15 PM
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Syren
dreaming

Gender: Female
Location: every which way but loose

Unity.

My fingers have gone numb,
They're clamped so tightly,
Entwined in yours, so close it looks like one hand.
My lips are sore,
Red and bruised, and swollen,
From where your fierce kisses have attacked.
My eyes are aching,
Tears sliding down my cheeks,
Tears of passion, pain and perfect emotion.
My voice is quiet,
I can make no sound,
Silence screams more loudly than I ever could.
But it's not a fight,
There's nothing wrong.
It feels so right,
Goes on and on, and on.
Until;
It's over, we've reached the summit, forever together.
Breathing in unison,
Staring.
In stunned appreciation of the magic we create.
Heat,
Power,
Love.


Written By Syren


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ThorinWoofer

Old Post Nov 4th, 2004 10:17 PM
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Syren
dreaming

Gender: Female
Location: every which way but loose

Reflections

I gaze into the abyss,
Entranced by the sight, in stunned surprise.
I see skin tone,
I see flecks of colour in the eyes.
I see each tiny strand of hair,
So perfectly detailed,
And I wonder if everyone sees what I see there.
I reach up and touch my cheek,
To wipe away the glistening, salty wetness residing,
To cleanse the image,
Make it pretty,
Make it right,
To uncover whatever may be hiding.
Then I stop, and I drop,
My hand.
How can I make you understand?
It's exactly how I imagined it to be.
It's Me.


Written By Syren


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ThorinWoofer

Old Post Nov 4th, 2004 10:18 PM
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Syren
dreaming

Gender: Female
Location: every which way but loose

Bite That Bullet

Concentrate, it's there in front of your face
Zooming towards you at lightning speeds,
Eye it, stare it out,
You've got barely a second before it slams you,
Knocks you to the floor,
Spilling your life blood, making you bleed.
Are you gonna stand there and allow it to tear through you?
I doubt it.
Bite that bullet baby.
Crush it to smithereens,
Spit it to the floor, and stand tall,
You're strength personified,
You've nothing left to cover, to hide.
Raise your face,
Take your rightful place, amongst heroes and martyrs.
Bite that bullet baby,
Grind your teeth until it tastes like sherbert,
Feel no more hurt.
Pain?
It has no necessary name, in your personal dictionary.
You're a trojan queen, you're Helen of Troy,
You're Cleopatra, screw that snake,
No-one has the right to take,
Anything from you.
Unless you give them permission.
Bite that bullet baby.
Bite that bullet.


Written By Syren


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ThorinWoofer

Old Post Nov 4th, 2004 10:19 PM
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Syren
dreaming

Gender: Female
Location: every which way but loose

Who will he pick?
Martreal, you make me sick
First Brandi and now Tiquana
You little prick!
Just make up your mind!
You want two girls?
How do you find the time?
I know, I know
You can only pick one
But get over yourself,
I will make this fun.
Iny-Miny-Miney-Moe
Ones a friend and ones a foe
But by now it should be an easy choice
Come on, think real hard
Listen to that little voice.
I Know if you really think hard
It will come to you
For now go sit in the yard
And decide who’s right for you

Me? I wouldn’t want you back with Brandi
Pick that other girl...
Amanda
No Wait, Tiquana is the one for you
Hold on, a minute ago there were only two.

Anyway I’m about to have a fit

Tiquana or Brandi...
Who will you pick?


Written By Ash


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ThorinWoofer

Old Post Nov 4th, 2004 10:20 PM
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Syren
dreaming

Gender: Female
Location: every which way but loose

A Picture

I'm gonna draw a picture,
a picture with a twist

Instead I'll use a razor blade,
and draw it on my wrist

And as i draw this picture,
a flowing fountain will appear

And as this fountain flows,
My troubles will disappear


Written By Ash


__________________


ThorinWoofer

Old Post Nov 4th, 2004 10:22 PM
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Syren
dreaming

Gender: Female
Location: every which way but loose

Darkness

I'm swimming all alone in a pool of darkness
and I feel like darkness is slowly pulling me under
I yell for help but no one is there to hear it
I begin to see the water at eye level
and I kick and flail
fighting to stay above the darkness
But the darkness won't let go of its hold on me
and I slowly begin to give in
to the feeling that lies below the water line
the waters starts to fill my lungs
the lungs that once held so much life
yet now they allow the murky water to replace that
I know that this path doesn't lead to happiness
But why doesn't someone grab my hand
pull me from darkness's grasp?
because no one knows I stand at the boundary
the boundary between light and dark
so I give in to the thing that holds me
All of the strength and all of the courage
that I once held in my heart
can't save me from the water
So I slowly slip below the world of conscientiousness
undetected by the occupants of that world
I don't want to fight anymore
I've given into darkness


Written By Ash


__________________


ThorinWoofer

Old Post Nov 4th, 2004 10:23 PM
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Syren
dreaming

Gender: Female
Location: every which way but loose

Drastic Action

Time comes for change, it's never too late,
Unless you believe that you're left to fate.
Grasping the strength to move on and grow,
Is harder than staying and not letting go.

Smiling through tears at the ones that you leave,
Whilst hiding the fact that you're dying to breathe.
Keeping your chin up, focused and steady,
While nobody knows that you're nowhere near ready.

To give up familiar, comfortable things,
To drop from the tree whilst fumbling with wings.
Widening horizons and learning to fend,
Looking out for yourself after years of pretend.

But sometimes it's needed and right now is for me,
I remind myself daily that I'll soon be free.
Refreshing a prospect, but challenging too,
But I'm strong and determined that I'll make it through.

The best thing about it is not being alone,
I lost something before, but now he's back home.
We've formed a new bond and plans for our lives,
One more passing comment; The strongest survive.


Written By Syren


__________________


ThorinWoofer

Old Post Nov 4th, 2004 10:24 PM
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Mr. Sandman
Sintastic

Gender: Male
Location: New York City

quote:
Originally posted by Syren
That's a really good take on the poem but I have to admit that when writing it I was imagining a lone creature, perhaps walking down a silent street, hands in pockets and shoulders hunched against the wind, even though, theoretically, he feels no cold. erm


That's actally what I had in mind for it as well. I don't have much time to draw recreationally anymore though...2 art classes at once is more than enough.


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Old Post Nov 4th, 2004 11:09 PM
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justjakk
Evil Bunny

Gender: Male
Location: In written pages

quote:
Originally posted by Syren
Daddy...
Why’d you have to leave me?
Why couldn’t you stay alive to see
What I have become for you?
You’ve been with me all the way through
But now you’re gone
To the Underworld you have flown...

Daddy...
Why can’t we return the days
When we used to laugh and play?
We’d swirl around the bend
I prayed to God it would never end.
Now I have my restless nights
Without you there to remind me of the light

Daddy...
I wish you were alive now
Maybe I would not be so down
Now all my fears seem so near
Sometimes I can’t even see you clear
You are there in my dreams
But I always seem to return to reality

Daddy...
I know that you’re with me in my heart
And that’s what keeps me on day and night
But I would like to say, Daddy,
That I have met some awfully nice friends
And our loyalty has no ends

So Daddy...
I miss you still
And you always have a special spot to fill
In my heart and in my mind
But now I think I can move on fine
But I will always remember the night
When you reminded me of the light....


Written by Ash


This was very hard for me, but i did it. My father died
11:10am Nov.22,2003 in St Lois, Missouri.
He died from cardiac arrest. His infliction was Cardio miopothy.
One of the symptoms of Cardio miopothy is Conjestive heart failure. The picture includes my dad and I in the upper right, myself from the funeral in the mid-upper left and a funerl pic of dad in the mid-right. I started off with the young man at the tombstone and then it grew from there.

I draw this not only as my take on this poem but also a dedication to my father. R.I.P.

Danny Joseph Morris Senior

Attachment: daddy.jpg
This has been downloaded 121 time(s).


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Old Post Nov 5th, 2004 01:28 AM
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D-Double
.. and some junk

Gender: Male
Location: St. Elsewhere

quote:
Originally posted by Syren
Vampyr

Darkness alights, suffocating the skies,
Time stands still once more.
I walk alone, sounds sweep over me,
No wind, nothing touches my pale skin.
I try to recall the sun on my face,
Impossible, a far away place,
Where the warmth was once felt.
I shiver, more a reaction to lack of memory,
For I feel not a thing, clinically dead.
Eternity ahead,
I long to breathe again, to inhale the sweet aromas of life.
To taste something other than death.
Acceptance is my next step,
My fate sealed as I roam the Earth.
But I am strength personified,
For I am the undead, nor alive, it's a confusing state.
I know not what runs through my veins,
Nor do I care,
I am neither here nor there,
Always in one place and yet in another.
I walk on.........


OK guys, all done for a while big grin


Chello. Here's my take on "Vampyr".
Syren > I'm a little freak'd out at your vision of Vampyr because it was exactly what I had in my head. I mean, EXACTLY. All the way down to the hands in the pockets. The only reason I didn't draw it that way was because I didn't feel like doing a street scene with cars and buildings.....
....Please stay out of my head, ya frigg'n psychic. stick out tongue (j/k)
I hope you like it. wink

Attachment: vampire 3.jpg
This has been downloaded 134 time(s).


__________________

Oh Sweat!

Old Post Nov 5th, 2004 03:59 AM
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Telpy
SKittle Addict

Gender: Unspecified
Location: Sector ZZ plural Z alpha

D-Double, very nice.
big grinbig grin

Old Post Nov 5th, 2004 09:05 AM
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Syren
dreaming

Gender: Female
Location: every which way but loose

quote:
Originally posted by justjakk
This was very hard for me, but i did it. My father died
11:10am Nov.22,2003 in St Lois, Missouri.
He died from cardiac arrest. His infliction was Cardio miopothy.
One of the symptoms of Cardio miopothy is Conjestive heart failure. The picture includes my dad and I in the upper right, myself from the funeral in the mid-upper left and a funerl pic of dad in the mid-right. I started off with the young man at the tombstone and then it grew from there.

I draw this not only as my take on this poem but also a dedication to my father. R.I.P.

Danny Joseph Morris Senior


This is beautiful JJ, the dedication, the picture, everything. I especially like the centre piece, I assume it's you crouched at your father's gravestone. It's so touching and you captured the essence of not only the poem but your emotion when you lost your father. Wonderful.


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ThorinWoofer

Old Post Nov 5th, 2004 05:01 PM
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Syren
dreaming

Gender: Female
Location: every which way but loose

quote:
Originally posted by D-Double
Chello. Here's my take on "Vampyr".
Syren > I'm a little freak'd out at your vision of Vampyr because it was exactly what I had in my head. I mean, EXACTLY. All the way down to the hands in the pockets. The only reason I didn't draw it that way was because I didn't feel like doing a street scene with cars and buildings.....
....Please stay out of my head, ya frigg'n psychic. stick out tongue (j/k)
I hope you like it. wink


I'm so glad you had the same vision as I did, I was worried that people weren't quite getting what I was trying to put across. It's great that people will draw their own personal take but it's also brill when someone sees it exactly as I did. This one is awesome, I really like your style yes


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ThorinWoofer

Old Post Nov 5th, 2004 05:02 PM
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justjakk
Evil Bunny

Gender: Male
Location: In written pages

quote:
Originally posted by Syren
This is beautiful JJ, the dedication, the picture, everything. I especially like the centre piece, I assume it's you crouched at your father's gravestone. It's so touching and you captured the essence of not only the poem but your emotion when you lost your father. Wonderful.



Im just glad i was able to do it. I didnt do much mourning for my dad until it finally hit me that i wasnt gonna see him again. I wasnt all too close to him during the last couple of months befor he died. I was only able to talk to him about two weeks befor, but he wasnt able to respond with his voice because he had tubes in his throat. Every once in a while something catches my eye and i just lose it. I hate it but it helps. I work at a cab company answering phones. When dad was alive he used to work there as well and when he would pay his cab lease, he would step in and say hi or i would go outside and bump into him and we would joke for about a minute or two. It just doesnt feel the same without him. I keep expecting for him to come by in his cab and talk but then reality sets in. I dont mean to be grim, but every now and then, someone who didnt know dad died would come by and talk about him and ask how hes doing. I try to break it easily but yanno i like a good pick at someone and tell them hes in a cemetary in Missouri. He resides at the Woodlawn Cemetray. They flip and i can almost hear dad laugh. He had a great laugh. If ya'll had a chance to talk to him ya'll would trip out. He was so funny. Anyways, Im glad ye liked it. Im proud when someone likes what I love to do.


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Old Post Nov 5th, 2004 05:48 PM
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Syren
dreaming

Gender: Female
Location: every which way but loose

All I can say is you seem to handle yourself so well. I haven't experienced what you have so I won't say I understand because that would demean what you are doing here, I'll just say thankyou for sharing wink


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ThorinWoofer

Old Post Nov 5th, 2004 06:19 PM
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