ur stories really gr8 so i dont think anyone really cares if u kill anybody off but i am a bit dissapointed that u killed off Regulus, i dont really care who else u kill off even though i dont mind the rest. Regulus was such a gr8 character but other than that this story is really gr8.
__________________ I was here,
here I was,
was I here,
of course I was
I think it was really good, but i think there were some flaws. First, i don't think draco would have dueled his mother, maybe his father, but he wouldn't let him die. and, harry wouldn't be so quick to believe snape. And, even though snape was on the good side, he would still be unfair to harry. I think some of it is unrealistic in the harry potter world, like that mirror spell. BUt other than that good story.
I saw you liked avatar, and i am writing a story similiar to avatar, so i think you might like it. I am not continuing until i get feedback, but i know how the story is going to go. PM me if you like it. heres the link:
Draco had to do what was necessary to stay alive, if he hadn't dueled his mother he would've died, and if he hadn't let his father die, he would have died
and I probably didn't make it clear enough Harry only believed Snape because he placed his trust in Hermione
yes, draco would have done what he needed to be alive, but, i think you shouldve shown some emotion on his side. And, are you going to include anything like dumbledore coming alive or anything?
what I don't get is why nobody will just LET GO. DUMBLEDORE is dead, gosh. And Brit531 you have no idea if i was going to do that or not, remember one of the chpaters still to come is titled Dumbledore's weapon.
RIP RAB
Sorry if that seemed a little Rude Brit531, but would you really like it if I went and told people something you weren't going to do with your story because you are so close to the end? Anyway, don't assume anything about my story, yes it's almost done. I have two more chapters to write and the last chapter to edit, because just like JKR, I have already written the last chapter and it needs some revisions due to things in the story taht have changed. I'm killing off somebody that I hadn't planned on killing off which will change the story a little bit, but not too much.
__________________
Last edited by Regulus A Black on Jul 29th, 2006 at 06:19 PM
Harry and Ginny went to St. Mungo’s and met up with Ron, Neville and Luna. They filled him in on the entire story and were told that there wasn’t an order member that could easily fight against Voldemort.
“We’ll take who we can when we go fight against Voldemort, anybody that can fight at that time should come and fight.” Harry said.
“Right, but as for now we all need to rest.” Ron said, “oh, and Harry, Hermione is getting better, thanks to you me and her are still alive.”
“There’s no need to thank me, but if you guys want to rest go ahead, I’m going to go to the riddle house and destroy Nagini.” Harry said. “I’ll catch up with you guys when I get back.” Harry left for the Riddle house immediately.
Deep underneath the Riddle house, was a dark stone room, filled with small dead animals. Harry could sense there was a snake around, counting on it being Nagini, Harry ran off through the corridor. Harry turned a corner and found it almost impossible to see for it had gotten dark. “Lumos” he muttered, the tip of his wand lit up and he saw something slither down the corridor.
Harry wasn’t sure what it was but hoped that it was Nagini, he ran after it as quickly as he could, turned another corner and saw something that surprised him. There were many different types of snakes, and none of them appeared to be Nagini. Harry slowly approached the snakes making sure to be as quiet as possible so he wouldn’t disturb the snakes. Harry reached the snakes, and began to search for Nagini. He decided to ask the snakes in parsel tongue where Nagini was. The snakes began to attack him, they had been trained only to listen to one human that spoke parsel tongue and to attack the rest. Harry started sending random spells at the snakes to stop them. Harry finished off the snakes and proceeded on his way, when he felt it starting to get colder.
Harry had no idea what to suspect, the temperature had just dropped, but he couldn’t feel the presence of any dementors. Slowly he proceeded down the hallway carefully looking where he was going with each step, if he knew Voldemort, this was going to have lots of traps. Then Harry saw something at the end of the hallway, in a large room, there was just enough light for Harry to be able to see something large moving in there. As Harry approached he was ready to tap into his magical core to use his powers without it knowing, so the creature wouldn’t have a chance to hurt him. As he tapped into his core something strange began to happen everything around him just seemed to move faster, fast enough that it seemed like Harry was moving through time again as he had done his third year except this time it was moving forward. When it all slowed down Harry not only saw the creature in the room, but a familiar person, he couldn’t really tell who it was but he knew he had seen them before. As he approached the room the man disappeared. Harry tried sensing him but couldn’t and noticed that the creature was knocked out.
“I wonder what that was,” Harry thought to himself, “I’ve never really seen anything like that.” Harry proceeded past the creature and the room it was in down another corridor. He had no idea how large this place was and never would have suspected it of being this large from the outside of the house, “But then again he thought, Voldemort is a powerful wizard, I’m sure he did something to it.”
Harry finally reached a door within the lair and noticed there was a smaller door which an animal could go through to enter the room. “This is it,’ Harry said, “this is the Serpant’s Lair.” Harry slowly opened the door and entered the room.
“Harry Potter, how nice of you to join me.” Came a high shrill voice. “I knew you would come to find my pet, yes she may be the last remaining horcrux I have, but you will never reach her. AVADA KEDAVRA”
The jet of green light shot straight at Harry, he dove out of the way and was nearly hit. Harry was beginning to tap into his magical core, knowing he was going to need it if he was ever to get past Voldemort.
“You can’t win Potter, I am much more powerful then you are. Give it up. CRUCIO” Voldemort hissed with anger.
“HAHISTNA” Harry shouted. The little mirror appeared in front of Harry and sent it back at Voldemort who dodged out of the way. “You should know that I’ve been trained by three of the wizards who have defied you. You won’t defeat me that easily.”
“Yes, you may have, but two of them are dead, thanks to one of them.” Voldemort hissed. “The one I trained.” Voldemort hissed, “if it wasn’t for me, Severus Snape wouldn’t be half the wizard he is today.”
“I wouldn’t be what?” came Snape’s voice.
“Severus, how nice of you to join us, I knew you must have been close behind if Potter was here, after all if it weren’t for you, he never would’ve destroyed any of the horcruxes really. You sent messages to his friend Lupin who taught him how to do it.” Voldemort hissed, “then you also let him take the cup. You know very well what I do to traitors Severus, after all I usually told you to take care of them.”
“Yes, but you also know that few wizards can touch me unless I let them, I don’t see why you’d be any different.” Snape hissed.
“AVADA KEDAVRA” Voldemort shouted. The jet of green light shot straight at Snape. It looked like it was about to hit him when, somehow, the spell refracted right around him. Everybody looked astonished. “Severus, tell me how you did that?”
“He didn’t do it.” Harry shouted, “I DID.”
“You? How could a boy your age do something like that, it’s unheard of.” Voldemort hissed.
“I’m not exactly sure how I did it, but I know it was me. I just remember thinking don’t let it hit him, don’t let it hit him.” Harry said.
“Liar.” Voldemort hissed, “it is impossible for you to have done it.”
Just then, the door opened again. “I figured you could use a little help, master.” Said the blonde boy who had just entered.
“Ah, Draco, I knew you wouldn’t betray me.” Voldemort hissed.
“I wasn’t talking to you.” Draco said. “I was talking to my master.”
“Draco, good boy. We need to hold off Voldemort While Potter get’s to Nagini.” Snape said.
“Right Sir.” Draco said, “SPEBEREL” A jet of violent orange and purple light shot out of Draco’s wand and headed straight for Voldemort.
Voldemort mumbled something and a wall of inferi appeared around him. The spell hit one of the inferi. “EXPELLIARMUS.” Voldemort hissed, with is wand pointed at Harry.
“Harry look out.” Snape said.
Harry turned quickly and the spell just seemed to stop in midair without Harry doing anything. Harry then flicked his wand and sent it straight back toward Voldemort. Harry wasn’t sure how he was doing all these things, but he knew it must have to do with his magical core. Harry quickly ran through to the next room looking for Nagini. Voldemort started after him.
“CRUCIO” Snape bellowed and it hit Voldemort in the back and stopped him. Voldemort fell and started screaming from the pain. Snape released him, and Voldemort got up angry and turned to face Snape.
“Snape you traitor, I cannot believe I didn’t see it earlier.” Voldemort hissed, “and Draco, after all I did for you, how could you turn against me.”
“You did nothing for me except force me to kill my father, why should I not turn against you?” Draco said.
“Fine, you two will die, you are no match for me.” Voldemort hissed, “AVADA KEDA…” Before he could finish, Draco had appeared behind him and and sent a disarming charm right at his back.
“Oh, so that is how we are going to play, by tapping into our magical cores?” Voldemort hissed, “well I can play that game as well.”
“CRUCIO” Snape bellowed.
Voldemort just stood there and let the spell hit him, or appear to hit him. Snape and Draco saw the spell hit him, but nothing happened, he seemed like he was a statue. Just then Harry came running back in with Nagini in his hand. She was dead, he had finished destroying the last horcrux. Then just before hearing the words “Avada Kedavra” they all sensed where Voldemort was, Snape ran toward him knowing he would try to kill Harry. The jet of green light shot out of Voldemort’s wand right at Harry. “RUN” Snape screamed at Harry, “Get out of here.” Harry didn’t hesitate at all, he moved as quickly as he could and barely missed the spell, just as Snape tackled Voldemort.
Harry grabbed Draco, and began running out, he wasn’t ready to defeat Voldemort yet, he still had something he knew he needed to do, and he was going to need all the help he could get.
“Snape, you will die.” Voldemort hissed, “nobody touches me.”
“So what, I did what was necessary to make sure Potter survived long enough to get the horcrux, and now I could care less if I died or not.” Snape said.
“Yes, but if you died now, I’d have plenty of time to catch Potter, he only just left.” Voldemort hissed. “I will not let Potter win. AVADA KEDAVRA”
Snape jumped out of the way. He thought about everything that had happened in his life, and how much he truly did owe to Harry Potter, or to his father at least. He was not going to let Voldemort get him, he would make sure to take as long as he could so Harry could make it to headquarters.
“EXPELLIARMUS” Snape shouted. Voldemort stood there and just allowed himself to be hit, again it didn’t seem to affect him. Snape began sensing the magical sources around him, then he felt it. “CRUCIO.” It hit Voldemort directly in the chest, he fell to the ground writhing in pain.
Voldemort got up angry, “CRUCIO” he said. Snape just stood there, and waited. The spell didn’t affect him, he then started walking toward Voldemort. The whole time blocking spells sent at him by Voldemort.
“You can’t touch me unless I allow you to.” Snape said. “Just give it up.”
“That’s what you think Severus.” Voldemort hissed, “SPEBEREL.” The violent orange and purple light erupted from Voldemorts wand and hit Severus square in the chest, he fell to the ground writhing in pain as huge gashes appeared all over him. “Any last words before you die Severus?”
“Just one.” Snape said, “STUPEFY.” Using his last ounce of strength Snape stunned Voldemort, then died.
oh... you guys meant story, umm don't expect anything storywise up for a week, because since you guys seem to be so impatient, haha jk, i'm just gonna finish the rest of the book before i post, then post them all, and i think i may also post a link to the entire story after i'm done so there is a clean version of the story you can read without having to go through all the posts that you people and myself have made that aren't story
k here's the situation, I'm halfway done, maybe more with chapter 27 Dumbledore's weapon/Stag returns. I'm tweaking chapter 29 Hogwart's Rebuilt with the changes that happened in the story, and adding more on to it, a secret i couldn't keep from certain characters. It should approximately be the longest chapter of the story and takes place about fifteen years after chapter 28 which i haven't really even started yet, i should finish 27 and start 28 monday afternoon i should finish 29 by wednesday and tweak as necessary as i finish chapter 28 by next wednesday or Aug 16 be patient
RIP RAB
RIP Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs (the Marauder's)
me done in two days with all but revisions on last chapter so post still be up Monday at the earliest, me not sure when me be done, me think you guys hate me after me finish, me want to finish soon just to never worry bout it me done talking now
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Jul 29th, 2006 02:31 AM
