If Tolkien was American,

Originally posted by Morgoths_Wrath
9) The Orcs probably wouldn’t have a British accent 🙄

they would have redneck accents.

Originally posted by KidRock
Im tolkien was american maybe Gondor and Rohan would have put up a better fight...considering they are british and all and we all know the brits arent exactly the cream of the crop

I don't think the title of the thread is 'Americans Suck and British People Rule...'. Although, maybe if he was American...

Oh, because of patriotism, he would have had the stars and stripes as the flag of Gondor... Unless he was anti-war, like the guy I stayed with.

If Tolkien was American, then certain phrases would be different.

It would be towns, not shires, favorite, not favourite, quotes would be "like this" and not 'like this', and Samwise would still be Samwise.

Really, this thread is becoming quite political, and as far as I can see (although, maybe not so far, as I am an American dumbass) American writers are no different than British ones, besides the grammar.

I'm almost positive that this thread wasnt really serious about the whole issue,Phoenix Song. It was to make fun of America using Tokien's writing style as a vent, just humorous. BUT if Tolkien really WAS American I think you have a pretty accurate description of what the books might be like.

yeah... with a sh!tload of explosions...

Originally posted by Morgoths_Wrath
I'm almost positive that this thread wasnt really serious about the whole issue,Phoenix Song. It was to make fun of America using Tokien's writing style as a vent, just humorous. BUT if Tolkien really WAS American I think you have a pretty accurate description of what the books might be like.

I know 😛

I am very close to many of these members, however, politics is not allowed here, so yeah. 😛

But thanks anyway. 😉

Originally posted by manchichirtchit
yeah... with a sh!tload of explosions...

🤨

The elves would have plastic surgery on their ears. 😆

lol

nice one

& yeah, Phoenix i def. agree. I get enough politics around the house we dont need it here

Originally posted by Morgoths_Wrath
After Gondor suffered their first defeat from Mordor, they would immediately invade Lórien, instead of taking on the scattered Orcs, in search of "weapons of mass distruction"

Lembasbread would be called McLembas™ ✅

hysterical

That one was good

Originally posted by Phoenix Song
🤨

eer

Originally posted by aniron
lol this is fun to read lol.

6. Aragorn would have an affair with Eowyn

Aragorns press statement would then be "I did not have sexual relations with that woman... or her horse..."

Originally posted by Darth Sauron
Wy because we dont shoot until we are shot at?

Unlike americans, us Brittish dont think guns are an extention of the arm.

I second that!

Originally posted by Phoenix Song
If Tolkien was American, then certain phrases would be different.

It would be towns, not shires, favorite, not favourite, quotes would be "like this" and not 'like this', and Samwise would still be Samwise.

Really, this thread is becoming quite political, and as far as I can see (although, maybe not so far, as I am an American dumbass) American writers are no different than British ones, besides the grammar.

well, as a student of english lit, I've compared it with german, french and american lit, and my friend Joe ((an american lit student)) has done comparisons with english lit... I can say they are VERY different!

Arwen and Eowyn would have a catfight over Aragorn!

Originally posted by Phoenix
I second that!

😊 hug

Originally posted by Darth Sauron
😊 hug

hug

if tolkein were american, it would have been about frodo escaping from some place down a river on a raft with an escaped elf... or gollum... stupid huck finn, all of the american authors are obsessed with it