How funny are you?

Started by Shaggy2dope5 pages

I will drag u to bed
I will make u feel things u never felt before
I will make u moan and groan all night long
I will keep doin it till ur too exhausted and i leave
my friend
The Flu 馃檪

Hah...I have that right now...

oh it would be a little funnier if u didn't see the flu yet i did it like that before and alot of people thought it was dirty till it said the flu lol

Heh.

A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY.The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.

The lawyer persists and explains that the game is really easy and a lot of fun. He explains" I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me 拢5, and vice-versa." Again, she politely declines and tries to get some sleep.

The lawyer, now somewhat agitated, says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer you pay me 拢5, and if I don't know the answer that you'll ask me, I will pay you 拢500!."

Figuring that since she is a blonde that he will easily win the match. This catches the blonde's attention and, figuring that there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to the game. The lawyer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?" The blonde doesn't say a word, reaches in to her purse, pulls out a five pound and hands it to the lawyer.

Now, it's the blonde's turn. She asks the lawyer: "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?" The lawyer looks at her with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references.He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the Net.

Frustrated, he sends E-mails to all his coworkers and friends he knows. All to no avail. Afterover an hour, he wakes the blonde and hands her 拢500. The blonde politely takes the 拢500 and turns away to get back to sleep.

The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, wakes the blonde and asks, "Well, so what IS the answer!?" Without a word, the blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer 拢5, and goes back to sleep.

Originally posted by Shaggy2dope
I will drag u to bed
I will make u feel things u never felt before
I will make u moan and groan all night long
I will keep doin it till ur too exhausted and i leave
my friend
The Flu 馃檪

Is that your idea of rolling over on your arse?

lol that was weird

Whats Brown and sounds like a bell

Dung

i like the jokes guys keep em commin so far little shrek man is winnin lol

keep em commin

An Afgahn boy and his father were visiting a shopping mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again. The boy asked his father, "What is this, Father?" The father [never having seen an elevator] responded "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is."

While the boy and his father were watching wide-eyed, an old lady in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched small circles of lights with numbers above the walls light up. They continued to watch the circles light up in the reverse direction.

The walls opened up again and a beautiful 24-year-old woman stepped out. The father said to his son, "Go get your mother!"

????

A man walks into the butchers and sez wheres ur assistant
butcher replys i sacked him for stiking his *i*k in to the bacon slicer
so the man sez wot happen to ur bacon slicer
butcher sez i sacked her to 馃槈

lol

Originally posted by Shaggy2dope
????

Don't you get it?

sorta

Originally posted by Time Of Evil
An Afgahn boy and his father were visiting a shopping mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again. The boy asked his father, "What is this, Father?" The father [never having seen an elevator] responded "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is."

While the boy and his father were watching wide-eyed, an old lady in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched small circles of lights with numbers above the walls light up. They continued to watch the circles light up in the reverse direction.

The walls opened up again and a beautiful 24-year-old woman stepped out. The father said to his son, "Go get your mother!"

i just got it 馃檪 lol 馃槀

I have a simple persons sense of humour so:

Whats brown and sticky? (A classic Joke)

A Stick

AND

What goes oooooooo?(Courtesy of Wotsits)

A Cow with no lips hysterical

I do realise that no one else will find these funny

Originally posted by Lydia_J
I have a simple persons sense of humour so:

Whats brown and sticky? (A classic Joke)

A Stick

AND

What goes oooooooo?(Courtesy of Wotsits)

A Cow with no lips hysterical

I do realise that no one else will find these funny

馃ぃ

Little Tommy's parents had tried everything to help his math grade: tutors, flash cards, "Hooked on Math," special learning centers, everything. Finally, they enrolled him in the local Catholic school.

The very first day, he came home with a very serious look on his face, went straight to his room, and started studying. His mother was amazed. Books and paper were spread out everywhere and Little Tommy was hard at work. As soon as dinner was through, he marched right back up to his room without a word and studied some more. This went on for weeks until Little Tommy proudly brought home his report card and showed it to his parents:

An A in Math! "Tommy! This is great! I'm so proud of you! Son, what was it? What helped motivate you? Was it the nuns?" Little Tommy shook his head.

"Well, then, was it the books? The discipline? The structure? The uniforms? What?" Little Tommy looked at her and said, "Well, Mom, it's like this.

When I saw that guy out in the lobby nailed to a plus sign, I knew they weren't screwing around!"