my new story

Started by critias4 pages

ill make sure i tell wut chars look like

Character Look Likes

Character,
Ragnoros: (all white) Short sleeve shirt, baggy pants. blank wrist bands, shoes.

Amy: Armored girl (all blue) 

Zoey:  Looks just like the girl only with pink hair.

Recnur: (all blue) baggy pants, torn (former short sleeve) muscle shirt

Stone: brown wrist bands, brown shoes, black short sleeve shirt, black baggy pants.

Chapter 3

Retrieval Mission

We decided to sleep for the night and find out who stole our stuff in the morning but I didn’t sleep. I staid up to meditate and do some detective work to try and find out who stole our stuff. There were only a few clues that the thief left behind. The person left behind a dogs footprint, a teleporting dome remote, and the memory of that person’s shadow. When the morning came we were all discussing who stole our stuff. Amy thought it was Recnur. Zoey thought it was one of the Shadow Walkers. I thought different. I thought it was a shape shifter. They thought I was joking so I proved it with all the info I collected from the clues. I told them It couldn’t have been Recnur because Recnur can’t shape shift. How I knew it was a shape shifter because of the non-human foot print. How the foot print got there was because the person spilled ink on the ground and stepped in it then wiped it off. But forgot to dispose of the footprint. I told them that it couldn’t have been a Shadow Walker because they can only travel through other people’s shadows not their own. Then they asked “but if that was a person’s shadow why didn’t we see a bag with all our stuff in the shadow.” I told them about the teleporting dome remote. So the thief teleported it with a teleporting dome. After all the chatting one question remains. Who was the person we saw last night?
We decided to stop talking and track down the thief. We searched most of the day and still nothing found. Then I had an idea. I teleported us back to the house and ran up into my room. I chanted “Ragnoros Crastuies Moshengal” my hands lighted up with a white light and foot prints were revealed. We followed them for miles. Till finally we ended up at a house. We walked in at own risk knowing the dangers that might be waiting for us. We searched every room except one bedroom. We walked in and saw a portal so we entered the portal and ended up in another room with a bag in the corner.
As we opened the bag we heard a footstep behind us. We teleported behind the person and saw that it was a boy. I chanted my spell words again but the light died down. Amy and Zoey asked what happened. So I told them since I used my powers to lead us here they aren’t working right now. So I told them they need to fight him. They stood side to side holding hands as they powered up (they have to so they can combine powers). Their joined hands glowed white while their separate hands glowed silver (Amy) and black (Zoey). They separated their hands and rose up into the air. Amy froze him into an ice sculpture and Zoey made a force field around the ice. The guy broke free and rose his hand into the air. A ball of giant rock formed up above Amy and Zoey and fell right on top of them. I sat there astonished that they had lost that fast. Then I knew I had to do something. But I knew I couldn’t or my life force would burn out and I would die. The guy walked towards me and formed another giant rock above me. As he dropped the rock a beam of blue light cut it into two pieces in front and behind me. I looked to the right of me and Recnur was there with Amy and Zoey along side him. Amy and Zoey joined hands and two blue spirits rose into the air and went right through the thief. The thief passed out and the spirits returned to Amy and Zoey. I knew how Recnur got there but I did not how Zoey and Amy got out from under the rock. They told me that Recnur teleported grabbed them and teleported out of harm. We waited till the thief awoke. When he did we asked him why he stole our stuff. He said he needed them to bring back his sister. We didn’t quite understand so he explained. He lost his sister to the Nihas Guards she fought against them to try and free their town from slavery. But sadly she failed and lost her life. Her last word was “goschthefar”. No one ever understood her.
As we walked out with our new friend we stopped and asked him for his name. He replied silently “Stone” and walked out the door. We followed shortly after and caught up to him.

chapter 4 comes on monday

chapter 4
The Loss of A Friend

any 1 here?

i think i've out done myself

Chapter 4
The Loss of A Friend

We all took part in making a new hideout when we got to Amy and Zoey’s house. It is hidden under the science institution so we can have un limited access to all their equipment. We finished at sunrise the next day. We all went in and looked around trying to memorize where every thing was. We made a meditation chamber, a technology room, 6 bedrooms, and Holographic Training Room.
We all chose our bedrooms. I got the biggest room so I could meditate in private. Everyone wanted to know why I needed to meditate in privacy I told them “because when I meditate my power sky rockets from 4.5 to a 8.5. So it can defeat anyone too close to me. They all understood that so we went to our separate rooms to make them our own. As soon as I got in I sat down and chanted “Ragnoros Crastuies Moshengal” I levitated into the air and started meditating. While I did that everything I carried into the room started levitating to the exact spot I wanted them. It took me 2 hours of meditating to fully regenerate all my power back.
When I was done meditating I took the transporter up above into the science institution. I went walking around looking for ideas I could turn into weapons. I didn’t find any ideas but I found a belt I could use. I took it to the creator and he said that I could have any of his creations. He also told me a little about the belt. it has weapons he created like the sonic tracking chip, the cyber sword, and a sack of marbles (weaker then the ones I make). The last thing he told me that the belt was powered by Mythoneom the strongest and most dangerous substance in the world. I put it on and teleported to the Mythoneom Temple to try and get some Mythoneom. When I got there I told the people about the belt and they said to head back in the cell to get the Mythoneom. When I headed back there I saw a person dressed in all black and he was grabbing a container of Mythoneom. The person jumped up in the air and turned around. I tossed a marble at him and hit the container of Mythoneom. The container blew up and a few seconds later a huge explosion occurred and blew up everything in sight for 2 miles around where we were.
When all the smoke cleared I was still alive by using almost all my energy to project a force field that could with stand the explosion of Mythoneom. A few minutes later the rest of the gang arrived and was astonished. I told them everything and we searched high and low for the person in all black. No trace of him was found. But we did find something. We found an empty drawer that was supposed to hold Mythoneom. That was the second empty drawer (first Mythoneom drawer was opened by the person). Good thing after I tossed the marble I tossed a tracking device. I pulled out the tracker and it led us to the mountain. We stopped where the signal was coming from and looked around. All we found were technology pieces. Then Amy casted a spell by saying “ Refirrelo” a portal opened and we went in. we ended up in front of a castle that didn’t seem to be too big. We entered and saw that it was just one pathway leading to a door. We ran to the door and slowly opened it. We saw the same person that stole the Mythoneom along with another person in an all black cloak with the hood up. We heard the cloaked person say “Nightshade stand down Recnur will take care of this.” The cloaked person’s hand glowed blacked and then Recnur walked in front of us and turned toward us. We saw his eyes turn red and then we knew that he turned evil. He rose his hands and blasted a giant dark ball at Amy.
I knew she couldn’t with stand the power of Recnur at this point so I ran in front of her knowing the danger that awaited me because the force field I generated during the Mythoneom explosion. The giant dark ball hit me while I pushed Amy as far back as I could. When the dark ball disappeared I was left lying on the ground barely alive. Then Recnur rose his hands again and every one of our group’s powers was drained except me (because I had barely any). Everyone that had a chance to beat Recnur was powerless now. So I gathered what little bit of power I had left and powered up. My eyes and hands both glowed white with anger. I only had enough power for one attack so I had to make it count. I formed one white ball. I tossed it at him and dropped down to the ground. I saw it hit him and knock him back into Nightshade. From then on I didn’t know what happened because I burned my life force out while using the last amount of power I had left. But Everyone filled me in. here is what happened.
Amy ran up to me to make sure I was still alive but I wasn’t. She started yelling at Nightshade saying that he should see what he has created by working for evil. They told me that he felt ashamed of himself so he rose his arms and two metal bars wrapped around Recnur and the cloaked person. Then he came over to me shined light on me so my shadow was showing and chanted “ shadow goshellef” and I came back to life. I asked him how he did that and he said it’s my shadow’s life force. I asked him where did Recnur go and he said he has turned evil. So during that mission we lost a friend but gained another one.

chapter 5

friendship is the strongest
power of all

comin tuesday august 2nd 2005

great job, critias. can't wait to read more tomorrow...

Chapter 5
Friendship is the Strongest Power of All

When we got back to the hideout every one went to sleep but I staid up to think about how close I was to being gone forever. I climbed to the top of the ladder so I could sit down and look at the moon. While I was outside Amy came out. She wanted to know why I jumped in the way of the giant dark ball and pushed her backwards. I told her if anything ever happened to one of my friends I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself for not doing anything. She understood me perfectly. We both staid outside all night talking and meditating. When the sun came up we went back down to the hideout to meet up with the rest of the team. They all look at us while when got to the bottom of the ladder. As soon as we were ready to eat breakfast we heard an explosion I teleported to the middle of the town and heard another explosion I teleported to the library and saw that the hooded person and Recnur were there.
I sneaked up 20 feet behind them and tossed 2 marbles and an ice over. They flew up in the air and came down and landed in the spot where the ice over hit. They both were stuck in the ground with only their heads above the ground. I pulled out the cyber sword from my belt and acted like I was going kill them. I asked them what they were doing and the hooded one replied “you’ll see soon enough.” I was tired of the hooded one’s words. So I walked closer to the two and Recnur chanted “convetyn demobleize.” They both broke out of the ground and then they did the most devastating thing anyone has ever seen. The hooded one and Recnur rose into the air and fused into one person. I was astonished that they had fused into one. The fusion guy had a muscle shirt (black all) baggy pants, and cloak with hood still up. My friends arrived and asked who that was and told them it was the hooded guy and Recnur fused. They couldn’t believe it either. Then the fusion guy formed a small ball 1 inch above his index finger and pointed it at us. Then the ball flew towards me and touched my chest. A huge explosion happened and nobody could see.
When the dust cleared we could see Amy and Zoey hands joined projecting a force field. We were all safe but we all realized that none of our powers matched to the power of his but we still tried. We attacked him with everything we had over and over. But nothing even fazed him. We got beaten up pretty bad and got smacked around like weaklings. We could hear him laugh every time our attacks failed. We kept trying to beat him even though none of our attacks even scratch him. Finally we realized we couldn’t defeat him. Then Amy walked up and said at least not alone but we need someone that won’t care to risk his or her life. I volunteered and Amy told me to get in the middle of everyone. I did and they all put their hand’s palms pointing towards me. They closed their eyes and their powers transferred to me!
I walked towards the fusion man. He tried to hit me with that little ball at me again but I dodged it. I walked closer and tossed a light ball at him. While he was busy trying to dodge it I teleported behind him and kicked him into the light ball. I then teleported right in front of him as he stood up. He asked me “how did you get so strong and what kind of power do you have now?” I told him this power isn’t all mine and it is called the Power of Friendship and with it we can do anything. He levitated backwards and threw a dark ball at me. I I formed a bow and arrow out of my power and fired the arrow at the dark ball. It went right through the dark ball and made it disappeared and is going straight towards the guy. When it hit the fusion two people went flying to the left and right of me. I split the fusion into the two people who made it. (the hooded guy and Recnur) I walked over to the hooded person and pulled the cloak off. I only got one glimpse of the guy before him and Recnur disappeared. I didn’t want to believe it but the evil hooded one that almost killed us is…….. My dad!!

chapter 6

Flash Back

coming august 2 2005

im guessing since so many people view my thread and not reply it must be bad to them

I love them and if ppl think their bad then they a very stupid your a very good writer keep it up

sorry meant to do this last night...
I think your doing a great job. Don't worry if people don't like your story. People like me and cornilna love your story and think that you write good.

Chapter 6

Flash Back

I stood there staring at where my dad was when I pulled his hood off. I turned around and walked towards my friends. I transferred all their powers back to them. They followed me back to the hideout asking who was it? Or who was under the hood? I didn’t answer their questions until we were in the hideout. I said my dad was in the cloak and he was under the hood. They didn’t look so surprised because they never heard what happened to my family. So I told then what happened to my family.
Six years ago my family were staying at a hotel because we were out of town. And we were watching T.V. when a fire came from my parents room. Everyone thought my dad was dead because he was in there. So we all went to see where the fire started. When we got to the entrance of the room we saw the same hooded person emerge from the flames. The hooded person try to kill me with a dark ball but my mom projected a force field so I lived. He threw another dark ball but this time my mom didn’t create a force field in time. So it killed her and headed straight for me. Then my older brother jumped in front of me and stopped the dark ball and lost his life. I was the last one left. Only 8 years old with little knowledge of how to use my powers. I ran out of the apartment and jumped off the balcony. I landed on my feet and ran off. A few minutes later I bumped into the hooded person that was in my apartment. I ran the other way but he was there before me. I tried going every which way but he was there before me. As I ran towards him not knowing he was there first he blasted a dark ball at me.
I stood there just waiting for it to hit me cause I knew I could do nothing. Then something whispered in my head get up and chant “ Ragnoros Cratuies Masgengal.” So I did and my hands glowed white I grabbed the dark ball and it turned white then I tossed it at the hooded guy and he disappeared. Then I traveled a few miles crying. Until I found a place to set up camp. Through the years I learned how to use my powers perfectly how to take care of myself.
I looked at Amy and said that is why I risked my life for you. It was because back then I couldn’t do anything to save my family. But this time I could do something so I did. Then stone stepped in and said “oh, so you didn’t do it because you love her? Cause everyone else thought that was why you did it to.” I told them it wasn’t because of that. It was because if something happened to any of them I could never forgive myself. So it has nothing to do with love. My whole story took up about an hour and it was time for bed. So we all went to bed even me this time because we all knew what was in store for us tomorrow. Another fight against my father. Late that night around midnight the group came into my room and woke me up. They all wanted to know something. How could they stop my dad when he can fuse with Recnur. I told them we can’t stop him separate but together we can do it. Then they all asked what is his real name. I told them with a silent voice Gheldrone. They were all astonished and when Zoey stopped to say what can we do I said “we can fight him together and that is all.”

chapter 7

The Location of The Cats Eye

today or August 3 2005

This is getting better and better. Let me know when chapter 7 comes.

how is chapter 6?

ok nvm

I thought that chapter six was excellent. Especially with how you talked about the battle him and his father had. It was really intense. Again...good job.