Steal Dialogue From a Movie, and Change it slightly.

Originally posted by DarkC
PART II
======
Lea: What's happening out there? I can't see!
Vinny: Shall I describe it to you? Or would you like me to find you a box?
Lea:..........*reluctant laughing*
Lance: Okay. From my keen 03'er eyes, I spy with me little eye...
Vinny: A rock?
(Lea stomps on Vinny's foot again)
Vinny: AY.
Lance: Okay. Listen up everyone! Their armour is weak at the groin!
David: Really?
Lance: From the looks of it, yeah.
Vinny: Nice.
Vinny: LET'S SHOOT US SOME ORC PENISES!
(Everyone starts laughing and takes up the chant)
"Penis! Penis! Penis! Penis!"

Down on the plain.......

Uruk-Hai 1: Why are they saying "penis"?
Uruk-Hai 2: I dunno. Maybe they plan to take a piss on us when we try and scale the ladders.
Uruk-Hai 1: Ewwwww! That's nasty.
Uruk-Hai 2: Are you gay?
Uruk-Hai 1: No.
Uruk-Hai 2: Then why the hell are you making such a big deal over their pee landing on you?
Uruk-Hai 1: It's gross.
Uruk-Hai 2: Yeah. Newsflash, bro. We're URUK. F*CKING. HAI. We're supposed to be gross.

Uruk-Hai 3: Or maybe they plan to shoot our dicks out.
(Every orc within hearing range shudders)
Uruk-Hai 1: Damn. I ain't charging.
Uruk-Hai Commander: Lemme put it this way, you pussies. If you don't charge, Saruman'll replace those dicks of yours with pussies. Literally.
(Every orc within hearing range shudders)
Uruk-Hai 2: Well...I suppose getting an arrow in the little guy would heal.
Uruk-Hai 1: Personally, I think it'd be cool to have a vagina. Apparently it feels better.
Uruk-Hai 2: Dude..............just..........shut the F*CK UP!

Part 3 Part 3 Part 3 !!!

Chants!

Woo

😆 😆

Lea: Penis! Penis! Pe - oh shit. Here they come!
Vinny: (sights down arrowhead) Excellent.
Lea: This f*cking blows. I can't even see over the parapet to shoot, let alone watch the fun.
David: Aw, there there.
Lea: Shut up David.
David: Yes ma'am. Oh wait. I'm company commander. SHIT!
David: ARROWS READY! AIM AT PENIS! FIIIIIIIIRE!

(Arrows loose)

Uruk-Hai 2: F***CK! AHHH! Man, that other dude was right. I'd rather have a pussy than last through this. Worst. Pain. Ever.
(Uruk-Hai 3 crawls up beside 2)
Uruk-Hai 3: "You do not know pain", he says. "You do not know fear", he says. Well, I say: "BULL! SHIT!"
Uruk-Hai 2: Amen to that, bro.

David: LADDERS!
Lea: Yay!
(Ladders fall, a bunch of UH berserkers jump off)
(shots of David kneeing one in the gut and throwing him off the Deeping Wall)
David: Use your axe, Lea!
Lea: Why? I see you didn't use your sword.
David: At least I didn't kick them in the balls and b*tchslap them until they fell off!
Lea: Well, I'm a woman, David. What do you expect?!
David: Good point. Where's Vinny?

(Vinny trips over a sword and accidentally lets arrow fly, which clips short a rope and sends a ladder falling to the plain below.)

Vinny: Woooooooow.
Vinny: *sees UH charging toward him* Oh. Oh shit.
Uruk-Hai: RAAAAAAAAAAR!
Vinny: One more step and I'll shoot you in the pee-pee!
Uruk-Hai: ARRRRRRrrrgh......*whimpering*
(Lea shoves UH off wall)
Lea: Vinny, you're such a pussy.
Vinny: Hey, hey, hey. I didn't see YOU take out a score of orcs with a single shot.
Lea: Maybe because I don't have a bow?
David: We saw that anyways. It was a fluke.
Vinny: Aw, damnit.

(Later on)
David: KILL HIM! VINNY!
Vinny: Wha?
David: That guy with the sputtering blue torch!
Vinny: Oh right. (aims, fires, hits UH's shoulder)
David: You f*cking retard! The penis, remember!
Vinny: Too late! Run!

(Everyone runs)

Vinny: ROYALGUARD! JacopeX! GTFO! It's gonna blow!
(They give him the finger)
Vinny: Oh, well....f*ck you too.
David: Oh shit! I forgot my iPod back there!
(David runs back)
Lea: David, you idio -

(BOOOOM)

David: (lands heavily 100 feet away) Oh my God. Oh, that was bad. But at least I got my iPod.
(David reaches into his pocket and pulls out a smashed wreckage of an iPod)
David: Oh, f*ck it!

(UH start charging through the breach)

Lea: Oh shit! David, I'm coming!
(Jumps down and crashes into a bunch of UH, taking them down instantly)

David: Oh my God, what a crazy ass b -
David: Oh.

Uruk Hai 4: Sheesh, how is it you're so damn small and weigh a f*cking ton?
Lea: Shut the f*ck up n00b. *beheads*
Lea: What the hell, a pithole? *trips*

David: Shit! Fire their penises!

😂

!!!

😆 Oh god.. 😆

Nice to see I was written out. 🙁

Originally posted by DarkC

David: Shit! Fire their penises!

Penii

Originally posted by LanceWindu
Nice to see I was written out. 🙁

Originally posted by Dwight Shrute
Penii

😆

Darkc.

You should post them all in one thread.

Its Hilarius .

Originally posted by Vinny Valentine
Darkc.

You should post them all in one thread.

Its Hilarius .

Originally posted by LanceWindu
K.Diddy: That was Snowball.

Gornack: Why do you call him that?

K.Diddy: Vinny Valentine made it up. It's a blow job thing.

Gornack: What do you mean?

K.Diddy: After he gets a blow job, he likes to have the cum spit back into his mouth while kissing. It's called snowballing.

Gornack: He requested this?

K.Diddy: He gets off on it.

Gornack: Vinny can be talked into anything.

K.Diddy: Why do you say that?

Gornack: Like you said, he snowballed him.

K.Diddy: Vinny? No; I snowballed him.

Gornack: Yeah, right.

K.Diddy: I'm serious...

Gornack: You sucked that guy's dick?

K.Diddy: Yeah. How do you think I know he liked...

Gornack: But...but you said you only had sex with three guys! You
never mentioned him!

K.Diddy: That's because I never had sex with him!

Gornack: You sucked his dick!

K.Diddy: We went out a few times. We didn't have sex, but we fooled around.

Gornack: Oh my God! Why did you tell me you only slept with three guys?

K.Diddy: Because I did only sleep with three guys! That doesn't mean I didn't just go with people.

Gornack: Oh my God, I feel so nauseous...

K.Diddy: I'm sorry, Gornack. I thought you understood.

Gornack: I did understand! I understand that you slept with three different guys, and that's all you said.

K.Diddy: Please calm down.

Gornack: How many?

K.Diddy: Gornack...

Gornack: How many dicks have you sucked?!

K.Diddy: Let it go...

Gornack: HOW MANY?

K.Diddy: All right! Shut up a second and I'll tell you! Jesus! I didn't freak like this when you told me how many guys you ****ed.

Gornack: This is different. This is important. How many?! Well...?

K.Diddy: Something like thirty-six.

Gornack: WHAT? SOMETHING LIKE THIRTY-SIX?

K.Diddy: Lower your voice!

Gornack: What the hell is that anyway, "something like thirty-six?" Does that include me?

K.Diddy: Um. Thirty-seven.

Gornack: I'M THIRTY-SEVEN?

K.Diddy: I'm going to KMC.

Gornack: Thirty-seven?! (to customer) My man-child sucked thirty-seven dicks!

Customer: In a row?

Gornack: Hey! Where are you going?!

K.Diddy: Hey listen, jerk! Until today you never even knew how many guys I'd slept with, because you never even asked. And then you act all nonchalant about ****ing twelve different girls. Well, I never had sex with twelve different guys!

Gornack: No, but you sucked enough dick!

K.Diddy: Yeah, I went down on a few guys...

Gornack: A few?

K.Diddy: ...And one of those guys was you! The last one, I might add, which-if you're too stupid to comprehend-means that I've been faithful to you since we met! All the other guys I went with before I met you, so, if you want to have a complex about it, go ahead! But don't look at me like I'm the forum whore, because you were plenty busy yourself, before you met me!

Gornack: Well...why did you have to suck their dicks? Why didn't you just sleep with them, like any decent person?!

K.Diddy: Because going down it's a big deal! I used to like a guy, we'd make out, and sooner or later I'd go down on him. But I only had sex with the guys I loved.

Gornack: I feel sick.

K.Diddy: I love you. Don't feel sick.

Gornack: Every time I kiss you now I'm going to taste thirty-six other guys.

K.Diddy: I'm going to KMC. Maybe later you'll be a bit more rational.

Gornack: Thirty-seven. I just can't...

K.Diddy: Goodbye, Gornack.

Gornack: Try not to suck any more dicks on your way through the internet!

no2

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LANCE WINDU: I'm gonna tell you this one time, Vinny feckin' Twist, an' I ain't foolin'. What I don't know - all them things I don't know - could get you killed if I come to know them. I mean it.

VINNY TWIST: Yeah well try this one, and I'll say it just once!

LANCE WINDU: Go ahead!

VINNY TWIST: Tell you what, we coulda had a good life together! Feckin' real good life! Had us a place of our own. But you didn't want it, Lance! So what we got now is Brokeback Mountain! Everything's built on that! That's all we got, boy, feckin' all. So I hope you know that, even if you don't never know the rest! You count the damn few times we have been together in nearly twenty years and you measure the short fecking leash you keep me on - and then you ask me about Mexico and tell me you'll kill me for needing somethin' I don't hardly never get. You have no idea how bad it gets! I'm not you... I can't make it on a coupla high-altitude fecks once or twice a year! You are too much for me Lance, you sonofawhoreson bizzneratch! I WISH I KNEW HOW TO QUIT YOU.

LANCE WINDU: [crying] Well, why don't you? Why don't you just let me be? It's because of you that I'm like this! I ain't got nothing... I ain't nowhere... Get the feck off me! I can't stand being like this no more, Vinny.

hysterical

bump 😗

😂

Originally posted by Gornack
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LANCE WINDU: I'm gonna tell you this one time, Vinny feckin' Twist, an' I ain't foolin'. What I don't know - all them things I don't know - could get you killed if I come to know them. I mean it.

VINNY TWIST: Yeah well try this one, and I'll say it just once!

LANCE WINDU: Go ahead!

VINNY TWIST: Tell you what, we coulda had a good life together! Feckin' real good life! Had us a place of our own. But you didn't want it, Lance! So what we got now is Brokeback Mountain! Everything's built on that! That's all we got, boy, feckin' all. So I hope you know that, even if you don't never know the rest! You count the damn few times we have been together in nearly twenty years and you measure the short fecking leash you keep me on - and then you ask me about Mexico and tell me you'll kill me for needing somethin' I don't hardly never get. You have no idea how bad it gets! I'm not you... I can't make it on a coupla high-altitude fecks once or twice a year! You are too much for me Lance, you sonofawhoreson bizzneratch! I WISH I KNEW HOW TO QUIT YOU.

LANCE WINDU: [crying] Well, why don't you? Why don't you just let me be? It's because of you that I'm like this! I ain't got nothing... I ain't nowhere... Get the feck off me! I can't stand being like this no more, Vinny.

hysterical

my dear god

this thread makes me happy

Mist: Happy anniversary, Vinny.
Vinny: Mist, we broke up two months ago.
Mist: Well, that doesn't mean we can't still go out, does it?
Vinny: Well, it does actually, that's what breaking up is.
Mist: But we can still make out, right?
Vinny: Of course we can

*makeout sesh begins*

(Somewhere in Upper Blackrock Spire...)

Ken: [talking to teammates outside cave] Okay guys, these eggs have given us a lot of trouble in the past, does anybody need anything off this guy or can we bypass him?

David: Uh...I think Vinny needs something from this guy.

Ken: Oh, does he need those Devout Shoulders? Doesn't - isn't he a paladin?

David: Yeah, but that will help him heal better, he'll have more mana.

Ken: [sighs] Christ. OK, well what we'll do, I'll run in first, gather up all the eggs, we can kinda just, ya know blast them all down with AOE. I will use Intimidating Shout, to kinda scatter'em, so we don't have to fight a whole bunch of them at once. When my Shouts are done, I'll need Anfrony to come in and drop his Shout too, so we can keep them scattered and not have to fight too many. When his is done, Bass of course will need to run in and do the same thing. We're gonna need Divine Intervention on our mages, so they can do area of effect damage. So, we can of course get them down fast, cause we're bringing all these guys, I mean, we'll be in trouble if we don't take them down quick. I think this is a pretty good plan, we should be able to pull it off this time. What do you think Alpha? Can you give me a number crunch real quick?

Alpha Centauri: Yeah, gimme a sec... I'm coming up with thirty-two point three three, repeating of course, percentage, of survival.

Ken: That's a lot better than we usually do. Alright, you think we're ready guys?

Vinny: All right chums, I'm back! Let's do this!

Vinny: (deep WWF announcer voice)NUMBER SIXTEEN, VINNNYYYYYYYY VALLLEENTIIIIIIIIINNNE!

(runs in)

Ken: Oh, my God. He just ran in.

David: Save him! Oh jeez, stick to the plan. Oh jeez, let's go, let's go! [follows]

NineCoronas: Stick to the plan guys, stick to the plan!

Ken: Oh jeez, oh f*ck.

(Three dozen dragonlings spawn and attack.)

H.S.6.: Gimme a Divine Intervention, hurry up.

Ken: Shoutin'!
(The dragonlings scatter.)

Lana: I can't cast! I can't move, am I lagging, guys? I can't move!

Ken: What the—what the hell?

David: I can't AoE!

Lana: I can't move!

Ken: Oh my God...

David: The eggs keep respawning! More respawning!!

Mist: I don't think you can cast with that shit on!

NineCoronas: Oh my God!

Vinny: We got em, we got em! I got it, I got it.

David: Take it off! Take it off! [muffled shouts]

(David falls into the egg pit.)

Ken: Stay down, Stay down. Oh my God..goddamnit Vinny! Goddamn it...

NineCoronas: Yeah, Vinny you moron.

Mist: God.

David: You idiot.

Ken: Listen, this is ridiculous.

Alpha Centauri: You dumbass.

Vinny: I'm on it.

Mist: I'm down, Michael is down. Goddamnit. [shouting, then a pause, followed by other put-downs] Why do you do this shit, Vinny?

Mr. Bacon: Lana, rez us! Rez us!

Lana: I'm trying!

Vinny [crying]: It's not my fault!

Ken: Who's Soulstoned? We do have a Soulstone up, don't we? [everyone dies] Think I need a Soulstone?

David: Yeah but you need a Warlock.

Ken[noticing everybody is dead]: ... Oh God...

Alpha Centauri: Oh for - [sighs] Great job! For Christ's sake! Vinny, you are just stupid as hell.

Mist: Oh my God...

Vinny: ... At least I have chicken.

The Original

😆

😂

Oh My God..

Laughing Still.

That video is pretty famous among our WoW world. 😊