Ken: Okay. So...we're going to tell a Halloween story, everyone. Gather round.
Vinny: Bkweeeu. Bkweeeu.
Mist: What the hell was that?
Vinny: Uh. That was thunder.
Ken: Riiiight. Go first, Mist.
Mist: Me? Oh, jeez. Okay. So there was a little, ah....goblin! And he often...looked arooound!
Ken: 🤨
Mist: And he did a little daaaaance!
Vinny: 😐
Mist: Yeah. That was terrible.
Barker: Gimme the flashlight! Gimme. Okay. So this goblin had an SUV. 250 horsepower with decked out rims, chrome stell. And it had Dodge Viper racing stripes, a DVD player, MP3 hookup, and tricked-out bass stereo speakers. Top dawg, biatches.
Vinny: My turn, my turn. So this goblin had three chicks. And they all had masks.
Ladyluck: One of the girls had a cat. It's name was...Kitty Kitty. The other girl had a puppy and it's name was Doggy. And the third girl was.....was......a republican!
(Everyone stares at her in disbelief)
BackFire: Blasphemy, Lea. Anyways. So there were all these porno magazines! Hustler and Playboy and Yaoi and Hentai! All in glosed up magazines and good to go! Videos as well! HD DVD's of bondage, lesbians, and -
Ken: I think we get the point.
BackFire: I'm not finished.
(Lana slaps him.)
BackFire: Jeez.
Ken: You guys suck! Here I go. So this big robot came and destroys everything!!!
(Silence)
Lana: Ken. That's your answer to everything. Last year a big robot came and destroyed the homes of three little kittens.
Ken: Every story needs action.
BackFire: And porno.
Ken: Maybe less of that.
Originally posted by DarkC
Ken: Okay. So...we're going to tell a Halloween story, everyone. Gather round.Vinny: Bkweeeu. Bkweeeu.
Mist: What the hell was that?
Vinny: Uh. That was thunder.
Ken: Riiiight. Go first, Mist.
Mist: Me? Oh, jeez. Okay. So there was a little, ah....goblin! And he often...looked arooound!
Ken: 🤨
Mist: And he did a little daaaaance!
Vinny: 😐
Mist: Yeah. That was terrible.
Barker: Gimme the flashlight! Gimme. Okay. So this goblin had an SUV. 250 horsepower with decked out rims, chrome stell. And it had Dodge Viper racing stripes, a DVD player, MP3 hookup, and tricked-out bass stereo speakers. Top dawg, biatches.
Vinny: My turn, my turn. So this goblin had three chicks. And they all had masks.
Ladyluck: One of the girls had a cat. It's name was...Kitty Kitty. The other girl had a puppy and it's name was Doggy. And the third girl was.....was......a republican!
(Everyone stares at her in disbelief)
BackFire: Blasphemy, Lea. Anyways. So there were all these porno magazines! Hustler and Playboy and Yaoi and Hentai! All in glosed up magazines and good to go! Videos as well! HD DVD's of bondage, lesbians, and -
Ken: I think we get the point.
BackFire: I'm not finished.
(Lana slaps him.)
BackFire: Jeez.
Ken: You guys suck! Here I go. So this big robot came and destroys everything!!!
(Silence)
Lana: Ken. That's your answer to everything. Last year a big robot came and destroyed the homes of three little kittens.
Ken: Every story needs action.
BackFire: And porno.
Ken: Maybe less of that.
Vinny: Hey Ken, looks like you have a new email.
Ken: Okay. Let's see what we have here.
"KenKenob====#%^&^h??>>>>Del11212rr\\}}"
Ken: What the hell?
Vinny: I see part of your name in there, but it looks like it's being eaten.
Ken: By some weird....Linux, or something. Wait a minute...
Vinny: Looks like one of those email viruses.
Ken: You mean like the ones mobs and casinos send you? Bah. I know just what to do with this!
(Opens up EdgarWare AntiVirus)
Ken: So, virus. Lemme introduce you to my main main Edgar.
("Welcome, KEN!"
Last scan was: 'NEVER' ago.)
Vinny: Teach 'em a lesson.
Ken: *hits Scan*
Vinny: (waiting)...ah, this should be good.
(You have: 430,205 viruses.)
Ken: WHAGH!
Vinny: Holy shit. Looks like it's going to infect KMC.
(Vinny's arm turns into a broken JPEG image)
Vinny: Shit! Do something about it! I don't want to get a mangina of sorts foisted on me.
Ken: Okay. Trying. *tries to delete*
(Error!)
Ken: What?! I said deleted!
(Error!)
Ken: Oh my God. What am I going to do?
(Flagrant System Error)
(Smaller text comes up)
Ken: (reading) "Computer over?" "Virus = very yes?"
Vinny: That doesn't sound like a very good prize!!
(Computer screen melts and drips onto Persian rug)
Ken: Jesus. And the Compy...just peed my carpet.
(Irene walks in)
Irene: Um, Ken, what's going on?
Ken: (noticing that Irene's legs are missing) GNAAGGH!!
Vinny: Um, that your legs are missing?
Irene: Have you been using the internet irresponsibly, Ken?
Ken: Ahhhh.....nosweat
Irene: Did you get a virus?
Ken: No.
Irene: Did you get four hundred thousand or so viruses?
Ken: Yes. Very yes. 😮
Irene: Well, do something about it! I hate floating in mid air!
(meanwhile)
Raz: What the - ?! Why is there "#1 nub" under my name? Where did my mod privileges go? KEN!!!!
...
Fire: WHO CHANGED MY NAME TO "Ice"?!
...
K.Diddy: Oh wow. I have mod privileges.
...
Ladyluck: My pictures! Where'd they go!? Ken!
...
DarkC: It's not letting me post. Jesus Christ, Ken. And I'm suddenly a 2006 member?!