Originally posted by General Petersyou are a a regular bowl of sunshine... I can not believe she didnt see the twinkle in your eye and fall in your arms... women these days... we dont know a good one if its standing dead in front of us..... 😐
One evening a week or so ago, I was taking out the trash and then walked around the block. I shuffled my feet and came around the block and I saw some chick coming out of one of the duplexes that are near my crib. I straightened up my posture and puffed out my chest some and saw that she was carrying a tub of something.
Ah, fukken recycling. So I said, "make sure you separate the Heinekins from the Amstel Lights....they get pretty pissed down at the recycling plant if you don't" We had a good chuckle and that was about it. I strolled on like I didn't have time for her.
I saw her get into her small little white car and head out.
Well, Yesterday during my break I grabbed some Subway and went back to my crib and ate, and then thought to myself, "I'll go and knock on her door and ask her out!" Her car was there so I did a few quick squats and pelvic stretches, checked my look in the mirror and squeezed my nuts while grunting, "Sack up, you pussy!"
I rolled out and ....well, no need to go to her door. There she was, checking her mail in her little box outside. I strolled up and said, "Excuse me..." Blone, short hair and not quite that hot....more fair skinned no doubt.Not AS hot as she looked in the dark, but still ample an ass enough for the G Honk. I made quick conversation with her (her name was Kasey) before busting into asking her to a local shrimp shack for lunch today.
And then the bullshit ensued....
"Well, my birthday is Saturday...so my friends are taking me out tomorrow afternoon."
"How about tomorrow night?"
"Well, I got family taking out tomorrow night, too, so...."
before I could say anything else she said, "And on SATurday...some other friends of mine are taking me out to eat for the evening.."I could see where this was going. I have the nads to walk up and ask for a date in a gentlemen-like fashion, and she returns the favor by lying like a little whore.
I reached onto the top of the mailboxes and grabbed a JCPenny catalog that was lying on top with some other coupons and stuff. On the cover were some hotties modeling summer gear, and I was sure there were some pics of B model swimsuit bitches.
I grabbed it and rolled it up and said, "So it sounds like 'Take Kasey Out For Her Birthday Weekend,' I guess," I said smiling like a pussbag, just taking it in the ass as she made quick work of me and shooed me off.
She said, "Yeah...it's like EVERYBODY'S trying to celebrate my birthday at the same time this weekend."I looked at her blankly while lightly batting the rolled up JC Penny Spankalog in my palm, and said , "And you know why that is, Kasey?"
she said, "why?"
I smiled sarcastically, turned around and took a couple steps as if I was walking away, and then turned my head around and squinted my eyes and said,
"Because you're just so ****ing special."Dead silence.
I just walked away and she had nothing to say at all.
WAR making ingrate, snotty childish bitches THINK for a second that life isn't all about them. WAR the days of yore when women were thrilled to have a handsome gentleman caller ask to court them.
I'll find out where she works and watch her place of employment crumble in due time because of the karma.
And if it doesn't, Proctor and I will just egg her fukken duplex.
Oot
seriously... ego much? Get a grip... just because your ass couldnt score some ass with her doesnt make her a lying whore. You dont know her... frankly I commend her for turning you down politely. Kudos to Kasey.
Re: I put some stuck-up chick in her place yesterday
Originally posted by General Peters
I'm just so awesome.
Now, honestly, I'm not feeding into the troll material here. I am going to respond in a semi-serious manner, though.
Let us ponder upon what happened. An average-looking girl--by your standards--turned you down for a date, politely. The question is, why would she do that to one as handsome as you allegedly are?
I believe that there are three possible reasons.
1. She sensed that your personality sucks.
2. You're not very attractive.
3. Both of the above.
I'm going to go with #3.
Originally posted by -Tired Hiker-
I seriously think he's making all this up.
Shame on anyone for thinking this guy - with his six posts and all - was anything other than a troll. Did I say troll? I meant horsef*****.
Originally posted by botankus
This could have been the single response and this thread would be history. Hell, ole' General Peters' rants look like they came out of a geek's self-help magazine, not the brain of some 500-lb. Uncle Jessie wannabe - the only type of hunk that would bother posting how "handsome" (I'm speechless on that one) he looked.Shame on anyone for thinking this guy - with his six posts and all - was anything other than a troll. Did I say troll? I meant horsef*****.
Well said! 💃
Re: I put some stuck-up chick in her place yesterday
Originally posted by General Peters
One evening a week or so ago, I was taking out the trash and then walked around the block. I shuffled my feet and came around the block and I saw some chick coming out of one of the duplexes that are near my crib. I straightened up my posture and puffed out my chest some and saw that she was carrying a tub of something.
Ah, fukken recycling. So I said, "make sure you separate the Heinekins from the Amstel Lights....they get pretty pissed down at the recycling plant if you don't" We had a good chuckle and that was about it. I strolled on like I didn't have time for her.
I saw her get into her small little white car and head out.
Well, Yesterday during my break I grabbed some Subway and went back to my crib and ate, and then thought to myself, "I'll go and knock on her door and ask her out!" Her car was there so I did a few quick squats and pelvic stretches, checked my look in the mirror and squeezed my nuts while grunting, "Sack up, you pussy!"
I rolled out and ....well, no need to go to her door. There she was, checking her mail in her little box outside. I strolled up and said, "Excuse me..." Blone, short hair and not quite that hot....more fair skinned no doubt.Not AS hot as she looked in the dark, but still ample an ass enough for the G Honk. I made quick conversation with her (her name was Kasey) before busting into asking her to a local shrimp shack for lunch today.
And then the bullshit ensued....
"Well, my birthday is Saturday...so my friends are taking me out tomorrow afternoon."
"How about tomorrow night?"
"Well, I got family taking out tomorrow night, too, so...."
before I could say anything else she said, "And on SATurday...some other friends of mine are taking me out to eat for the evening.."I could see where this was going. I have the nads to walk up and ask for a date in a gentlemen-like fashion, and she returns the favor by lying like a little whore.
I reached onto the top of the mailboxes and grabbed a JCPenny catalog that was lying on top with some other coupons and stuff. On the cover were some hotties modeling summer gear, and I was sure there were some pics of B model swimsuit bitches.
I grabbed it and rolled it up and said, "So it sounds like 'Take Kasey Out For Her Birthday Weekend,' I guess," I said smiling like a pussbag, just taking it in the ass as she made quick work of me and shooed me off.
She said, "Yeah...it's like EVERYBODY'S trying to celebrate my birthday at the same time this weekend."I looked at her blankly while lightly batting the rolled up JC Penny Spankalog in my palm, and said , "And you know why that is, Kasey?"
she said, "why?"
I smiled sarcastically, turned around and took a couple steps as if I was walking away, and then turned my head around and squinted my eyes and said,
"Because you're just so ****ing special."Dead silence.
I just walked away and she had nothing to say at all.
WAR making ingrate, snotty childish bitches THINK for a second that life isn't all about them. WAR the days of yore when women were thrilled to have a handsome gentleman caller ask to court them.
I'll find out where she works and watch her place of employment crumble in due time because of the karma.
And if it doesn't, Proctor and I will just egg her fukken duplex.
Oot
Ok.......before you ask some one out...you proble need to know alot about them...and did you ever think she had a bf?
Re: I put some stuck-up chick in her place yesterday
Originally posted by General Peters
One evening a week or so ago, I was taking out the trash and then walked around the block. I shuffled my feet and came around the block and I saw some chick coming out of one of the duplexes that are near my crib. I straightened up my posture and puffed out my chest some and saw that she was carrying a tub of something.
Ah, fukken recycling. So I said, "make sure you separate the Heinekins from the Amstel Lights....they get pretty pissed down at the recycling plant if you don't" We had a good chuckle and that was about it. I strolled on like I didn't have time for her.
I saw her get into her small little white car and head out.
Well, Yesterday during my break I grabbed some Subway and went back to my crib and ate, and then thought to myself, "I'll go and knock on her door and ask her out!" Her car was there so I did a few quick squats and pelvic stretches, checked my look in the mirror and squeezed my nuts while grunting, "Sack up, you pussy!"
I rolled out and ....well, no need to go to her door. There she was, checking her mail in her little box outside. I strolled up and said, "Excuse me..." Blone, short hair and not quite that hot....more fair skinned no doubt.Not AS hot as she looked in the dark, but still ample an ass enough for the G Honk. I made quick conversation with her (her name was Kasey) before busting into asking her to a local shrimp shack for lunch today.
And then the bullshit ensued....
"Well, my birthday is Saturday...so my friends are taking me out tomorrow afternoon."
"How about tomorrow night?"
"Well, I got family taking out tomorrow night, too, so...."
before I could say anything else she said, "And on SATurday...some other friends of mine are taking me out to eat for the evening.."I could see where this was going. I have the nads to walk up and ask for a date in a gentlemen-like fashion, and she returns the favor by lying like a little whore.
I reached onto the top of the mailboxes and grabbed a JCPenny catalog that was lying on top with some other coupons and stuff. On the cover were some hotties modeling summer gear, and I was sure there were some pics of B model swimsuit bitches.
I grabbed it and rolled it up and said, "So it sounds like 'Take Kasey Out For Her Birthday Weekend,' I guess," I said smiling like a pussbag, just taking it in the ass as she made quick work of me and shooed me off.
She said, "Yeah...it's like EVERYBODY'S trying to celebrate my birthday at the same time this weekend."I looked at her blankly while lightly batting the rolled up JC Penny Spankalog in my palm, and said , "And you know why that is, Kasey?"
she said, "why?"
I smiled sarcastically, turned around and took a couple steps as if I was walking away, and then turned my head around and squinted my eyes and said,
"Because you're just so ****ing special."Dead silence.
I just walked away and she had nothing to say at all.
WAR making ingrate, snotty childish bitches THINK for a second that life isn't all about them. WAR the days of yore when women were thrilled to have a handsome gentleman caller ask to court them.
I'll find out where she works and watch her place of employment crumble in due time because of the karma.
And if it doesn't, Proctor and I will just egg her fukken duplex.
Oot
Do you sit in your "crib" making these things up? You know play the stories in your head and then write them down, maybe to post at a later date? I ask because i doubt any of these events have actually taken place.
And in the slight chance they did I have to say you have a skewed perspective of the meaning "gentleman." I doubt a gentleman would refer to a girl knocking you back as a whore.
Originally posted by The PictYup. The other thread was locked.
Do you sit in your "crib" making these things up? You know play the stories in your head and then write them down, maybe to post at a later date? I ask because i doubt any of these events have actually taken place.
And in the slight chance they did I have to say you have a skewed perspective of the meaning "gentleman." I doubt a gentleman would refer to a girl knocking you back as a whore.
Re: I put some stuck-up chick in her place yesterday
Originally posted by General Peters
Ah, fukken recycling. So I said, "make sure you separate the Heinekins from the Amstel Lights....they get pretty pissed down at the recycling plant if you don't"
Yes, they like it when you seperate the green from the brown!
What about the clear Corona bottles?