Originally posted by Imperial_Samura
Unless it is because people really are saying the only difference between those two examples and friends who aren't having sex is, once again, the fact they are "sexually exclusive", just while not having sex.
Precisely.
Originally posted by Imperial_Samura
Are you prepared to say there is more to a romantic relationship then sexual exclusivity? I can only imagine the answer being yes. And if that is the case would those features be present even in an open ended relationship?
That is the question, is it not?
Originally posted by Imperial_Samura
If it is the case it is no longer just friends with benifits because the feelings within it no longer match the title.
You are missing the point. Friends who have a sexual arrangement, i.e. friends with benefits, may be more comfortable defining this arrangement in the context of a relationship. By your reasoning, i.e. that relationships should be defined subjectively, this arrangement would qualify as a relationship, because the parties involved define it as such, even though you acknowledged in your previous post that it is merely a sexual arrangement. Can I call a shovel an ice-cream machine or not?
Originally posted by Imperial_Samura
People who say such things are wrong in my opinion. And that is the danger I feel of applying ones own relationship values to another, "different relationship". Just because we couldn't reconcile love with an agreement that essentially grants sex outside of a relationship doesn't mean others can't because it seems they can and do.
Whether they can “reconcile love with an agreement that essentially grants sex outside of a relationship” is not in question. What is in question is what those relationships would qualify as.
Originally posted by Imperial_Samura
If two men or women love each other then they are in love and that is their relationship. If two people are in love but have very liberal ideas about sexual commitments then they are in love and that is there relationship. In both cases while the execution might be different the intent and the way the people actually in the relationship feel doesn't differ from a sexually exclusive, heterosexual relationship where the people feel they are in love.
Another False Analogy; in the case of a man and a woman, two men, or two women, the execution is the same, i.e. sexual exclusivity with a single partner. It is in the case of open-relationships alone that the execution is different.
If a friend and I have romantic feelings for one another but do not pursue them, then by your reasoning, because the way we feel “doesn't differ from a sexually exclusive . . . relationship where the people feel they are in love,” then we are in a relationship, even though this is not the case. Clearly, our relationship is not defined by our feelings for one another, but how we choose to act in accordance with those feelings.