Dante: Don't worry Beatrice, I shall-- *looks down into Hell* pray you have a pleasent time down there.
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Big Daddy: I ain't babysitting this whiny, little bed wetter unless you pay me first.
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Alan Wake: Screw this complicated nonsense. I'm just gonna write "we all lived happily ever after" and "The End" so we can get this over with.
Captain Price: Okay, Soap and I will take the Shipyard, Roach and Ghost--
Soap: Whoa whoa whoa wait a second, did anyone else ever actually notice that Ghost talks just like Gaz?
Task Force 141: .... huh?
Soap: Your joking right? Come on just listen to him! He's got the same goddamn voice, he has a skull mask, he got shot in the face by a f***ing desert eagle! I bet that's Gaz under there!
Ghost: Calm down Soap.
Soap: You know what, f*** ya'll. I'm going home to f*** my girlfriend.
Captain Price: ... okay then.
Soap: and by the way Price, F*** you! So what if my name is Soap! I shot Zakaev, what did you do huh!? 'Ohhh look at me, I'm captain price and I can't even win a fist fight against a dude who just got dropped from a helicopter to the f***ing ground!' Yeah you know when he stabs me at the end of this game? You know how it feels yeah well it, F***ING HURTS!
*soap walks off set then yells*
Soap: GOD **** IT!
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Nero: Guess you came back for more.
Dante: I want your body.
Nero: What!?
Dante: Mmmm... Ohhhhhh yeahh
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Mario: *Jumps up and eats mushrooms*
Luigi: .. *looks at peach* do you think that we're setting a bad example for the future of America by telling them that doing shrooms is a good thing?
Peach: nah.
Mario: *Burps fire all over Bowser*
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Sonic: This is the end Eggman!
Tails: Yeah! You have no where else to run!
Sonic: Oh shut up Tails, and by the way what the hell are you?! Your supposed to be a boy but your voice and theme song say otherwise.
Tails: Sonic..
Sonic: Gah, whatever... transy.
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Marcus: Dom, give me cover.
Dom: No.
Marcus: What?!
Dom: dude, my wifes dead. What the hell is there for me to live for in this world now?
C Carmine: *dies*
Dom: He died again, Carmine stop trying to top Kenny, you die in like every f***ing game!
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Goku: Your mom's a lesbian!
Vegeta: WHAT!?
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Bayonetta: You know why I move around so much? It's because of the damn lice! Why do I even have a suit made of hair in the first place? It's so friggin itchy!
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Leon Kennedy: Why do you Spaniard cops hate me anyway?
S-Cop #1: Because gringo, you stole his scheme.
Leon: Excuse me?
S-Cop #2: Yeah, you stole Batou's jacket scheme from Ghost in the Shell.
Leon: I wore this before he did.
S-Cop #1: Don't be bull$#!++ing us! First episode of the first season came way before your game made its debut. Try explaining that.
Leon: Uh...
S-Cop #2: I told you he'd be speechless if we found out.
Leon: You know what, screw you all. I hope you get impaled and I hope you get eaten! I ain't gonna take this nonsense anymore! *storms out of the car*
Before the release of Final Fantasy VII...
Sephiroth: So Nobuo, how's the progresss going with my own theme?
Nobuo: Well....
Chrorus: Bells, bugs, big cherries, little bear, mac and cheese, bells, bugs, big cherries, little bear, mac and cheese, SEPHIROTH!
Sephiroth: What in the...
Chorus: Swords in my knees, and tea bunnies, swords in my knees, and in this feast! Bells, bugs, big cherries, little bear, mac and cheese, bells, bugs, big cherries, little bear, mac and cheese, SEPHIROTH!
Sephiroth: .............
Chorus: Many many many @$$, everybody touching--
Sephiroth: Okay, that's it! Nobou, fix this or else you'll become rust on my blade!
Nobou: I could just edit their voices and try to make it all sound like jibberish but won't the fans ask what they mean?
Sephiroth: I don't care! Do it! Do it now! We'll figure it out later.
Little did he know that Nobou didn't have the time to edit...
Ark Survivor: Wait, wait, wait. So you're telling me that I have to go clean house at a hideout filled with murderous bandits by myself with just a pistol and a funny-looking boomerang?
Hagar: Well...yeah.
Ark Survivor: Who do you think I am, Rambo? I don't know what you were expecting to come out of that Ark but I sure as hell ain't it. I was an accountant before all this happened and now I'm being treated like a hired gun even though this "hired gun" just woke up a few minutes from the modern ages into a world of **** and has no experience with weaponry or any type of combat and is being told to solo an entire gang as if this were a videogame. You know what old man? **** you. I am gone.
Hagar: Wow. What an @$$hole.