Give the person below you a choice between two options

Like the ask the person below you a question thread the person must first choose one of the two options—and "neither" isn't an option—. Whether this question involves enduring two kinds of torture or the choice between two deserts is up to the one constructing the question.

Coke or Pepsi?

Pepsi.

Missionary or doggie style?

Doggy.

"Be black or crippled?"

Black, I'm already black from the waist down, proportionally speaking, so I might as well go with the color to match it.

Tea or coffee?

Tea

Astner as your only companion for life, or kill
1000 people?

10000 people and you've got yourself a deal

EF or a swift kick to the nuts?

Swift kick in the nuts.

Getting stabbed in the eyeball or sit in a room for an hour talking to Assner?

Latter.

Raped by a Rhino or raped by a Giraffe?

Giraffe, I'd imagine that it would hurt less.

Would you rather play a game of strip poker again That ADHD Chick or Cthulhu?

Playing strip poker with myself would be pretty fun so I'll go with that. Plus I don't think Cthulhu wears clothes. haermm

Would you rather be burned alive or freeze to death?

Freeze.

Face Zombies or Face Aliens as a world ending?

Zambies

Would you rather listen to every single One Direction song or watch all the Twilight movies in a marathon?

Twilight.

Cutting off your eyelids with a a par of scissors or having your hands amputated?

Gamer here. Eyelids for obvious reasons.

Nails on a chalkboard or explosive diarrhea?

Nails on a chalkboard

Play ten rounds of MW3 with a "gamur grrl" or play the Staircase Game?

Staircase game....

Chug a bottle of acid, or run through a playground of razor wire?

Le playground

Relive your favorite character dying everyday for the rest of your life or have your heart cut out and stomped into the dirt?

Favorite character die over and over.

Go completely bald and find you have an ugly misshapen head OR have permanent head lice?

Bald and misshapen.

Cat or dog?

Dog

Headache or Stomachache?