Thor gets really, really, really drunk on a night out with Tony Stark (he's had 700 f*ckin' Jager Bombs, and 200 bottles of Jagermeister) and, in a Ben Roethlisberger-esque manner, winds up in a bathroom with Mary Jane and Gwen Stacy and tries to force himself on them. Spider-man is at the same bar having a reunion with some of the spider themed members of his supporting cast and rogues gallery and goes to use the bathroom after having a few drinks. As he approaches the door his Spider sense goes off and he can hear the sound of muffled screams and cries. He opens the door to find Thor, in his drunken, semi maddened state, holding Gwen and Mary Jane by the hair and forcing them to perform fellatio on him as they are attempting to scream for help (but can't because Thor keeps filling their mouths). Peter shoots webbing onto Gwen and Mary Jane and pulls them away from Thor. Thor reaches for Mjolnir but, due to his actions, he has been deemed unworthy of holding the hammer by Odin's enchantment. Thor, even more enraged now, then pulls up his pants and pushes Spider-Man forcefully through the bathroom door, sending him flying across the room and into the bar, shattering many glasses and bottles of alcohol. Venom and Toxin's spider senses go off as well, and the assemblage notice the commotion. They see Thor storm out of the bathroom and about to assault Spider-Man. Venom and Co. decide to jump Thor for being a dirty bastard.
Thor says "Have at thee, villains!!"
Thor (without Mjolnir, but with a bottle of Jagermeister in hand, drunk as sh*t, and in a semi-maddened state)
Vs.
Spider-man
Venom (Brock)
Carnage
Toxin
The Doppelganger
Black Tarantula
Tarantula
Scarlet Spider
Ezekiel
Kaine
Anti-Venom
Spidercide
Thousand
Battle takes place in a crowded Elephant Bar on a Friday night.
Elephant Bar is a chain of restaurant/bars, kinda like TGI Fridays, Outback Steakhouse, or Chili's. It's a popular place for dates and outings. Good drinks and happy hour.
Spider-Man alone would give a drunken Thor for his money. Add the others Spiders into the equation, and you get one beatup asgardian.
---
btw, I figured Spiderman's reaction upon seeing Thor naked would be laughter followed by, "Now I see why you carry that big hammer of yours around all the time, 'big' fella!"
I am in your algorithm learning all your mannerisms
I'm already level with God
A million words a second and I know your imperfections, baby
I'm the only future you've got
Speak in diatonics, motivation diabolic
I'm like a religion, better locked in a box
Picture perfect image, more powerful every minute, baby
I am everything that you're not
Gender: Male Location: Balls deep in your cerebral cortex
this would be like Neo vs. all the Smith clones in the Reloaded. The Spiders would pile on top of Thor, he'd flex and the spider's would go flying. He'd choke the life outta them one by one.
This could also be a stalemate because without Mjolnir, i don't think Thor can put down Venom/Carnage.
KMC Community Forums
Sep 21st, 2010 05:37 PM
