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How do you like it?
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It was great |
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63.64% |
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It could use improvement |
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It sucked. |
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15.15% |
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33 votes |
100% |
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xEsaulx
Bringer of Life
Gender: Male Location: The Land of Quar |
Harry Potter Book Seven
Warning: The things in here continue after the sixth Harry Potter book. If you haven't read it or finished it, I advise you not to go to far into the story.
Carrying on...I haven't thought of a title yet. I'm trying to be creative with it, and none has popped in my head. Additionally if you figure out stuff that you think will happen, please don't post them on here. And all comments are welcomed...good or bad.
Occasionally I might ask for help. But please don't give any suggestions until I ask. Thank you.
Chapter One
"Severus..." a man was pleading. He was weak, too weak to defend himself. He laid on the ground pleading with the man who held his wand firm. "Severus please..." the man continued to plead.
"Avada Kedavera!" shouted the man known as Severus. The pleading man was dead. His eyes no longer had the usual gleam. A single tear trickled down his face. His half-mooned spectacles were dangling near his crooked nose.
Then their was cold laughter. High cruel laughter that filled the room. This man was pleased that the deed was done, but he was also angered that the one he wanted to finish the deed did not, but his faithful servant did. He was pleased about that, but he had to punish one of them. What one he did not know.
He was staging this whole affair on purpose. He knew that someone would be watching when he would talk to the two, he planned on this happening. Nothing could go wrong, because the young Harry Potter would go running to the Order about what was going to happen. He sat down in his chair waiting for the two men to enter his room.
The door swung opened slowly. A boy of seventeen entered. His face was paler than usual, his usual well groomed blond hair was untidy. He no longer wore his fancy clothes, but dirty muggle clothes. He looked worried, he was horrified being here. His wand was held loosely in his right hand. He bowed deeply, and then went up to kiss the hem of the man's blond.
The other man was tall, and wore plain black robes. His black hair went about to his chin. He too had a wand, but held it firmly, prepared for what was to come. He too bowed deeply and kissed the hem of the man's robe. He didn't look as worried as the pale boy. In fact he was calm, which did seem unusually strange, but the man in the chair thought nothing of it.
"Severus, Draco, thanking for coming on such short notice." said the man.
"It is our honor of being able to be in your presence Master." said the tall man.
"Severus, why lie to your Master anymore? Haven't you learned enough from when you worked for Dumbledore?"
"Master, why would I lie to you?" asked Severus.
"Because I found out who really killed the old man. It was not who I wanted it to be. I wanted it to be young Malfoy over here. Yet you stepped in and killed him. Now you are no longer of use to me." said the man. "If you have followed the orders that were given to you, then you would have lived for a little while longer."
"Master, I understand what I've done wrong...but Malfoy was following for Dumbledore's trick. He was lowering his wand. Surely you didn't want Dumbledore to find out that Malfoy was the one who let the Death Eaters in."
" Why is that Severus? Do you like defying me? Do you wish to anger me? Do you think for a moment that I would believe in your troublesome lies?" the man rose to his feet, wand out in hand preparing to use the Cruciatus Curse.
"M-master, it is not h-his fault. My m-mom f-forced him to make the U-unbreakable Vow. It was the only way for him t-to keep h-his role as a teac-teacher at Hogwarts." said the boy cowardly. He usually sounded proud, but now these days, he had nothing to be proud of.
Severus had a scornful look in his face. He didn't dare say anything, especially in front of his Master. Severus was losing control of this meeting. His plan was for him to do all the talking and Malfoy was to keep his mouth shut. If he did, then his Master wouldn't know of any of this. Now that his Master knew, then he would start to ask more questions. And Severus didn't like answering to the Dark Lord, Voldemort, the most feared man in the world.
Severus was trying to think of a way to get out of the mess that Malfoy had gotten them into. He had nothing to help him, and his Master would wonder if he used Occlumency against him. Their was no way of hiding it now. He might as well give him the information that he had. It would be worse if he read his mind.
"So Severus, an Unbreakable Vow, is that correct. You swore to Narcissa that you would finish his job if he wasn't able to. Why would you take this length to protect Mr. Malfoy? He would have been capable if you haven't been trying to help him throughout the year. He what he was doing. I am thoroughly disappointed with you."
"Master it isn't like I had a choice. If I hadn't taken the vow, then I would have never found out what Dumbledore was up to all year. He knows of a way to defeat you. He was showing young Potter how you became to be the most feared man. He told him of the Horcruxes."
"WHAT???" Voldemort bellowed out. "HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE?"
"It gets worse...Dumbledore's been able to destroy one of them, and he's found out that your diary was a Horcrux. He knows of others, but did not tell me about them."
Voldemort's face turned from normal pale grayish color to red in few quick seconds. He pointed his wand at Severus's throat. It looked like he was going to explode with anger. He was angered by the very thought of Dumbledore knowing about his precious Horcruxes. Two of them were destroyed. One by Potter in his second year. He put a part of his soul into the diary, hoping for the chance to come back. He almost did too, he almost killed a young girl, but Potter had to come and save the day. He was delayed of coming back. Dumbledore destroyed another one meaning their were five left, and he had to secure them, so Potter won't be able to destroy him.
"WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THIS SOONER?" bellowed the Dark Lord. Severus was losing Voldemort's trust every minute. He didn't like it when people try to hide information.
"Master, I had no time. Dumbledore made me stay, he wanted me to help with the security."
"More lies!" shouted the Dark Lord. "I know that you had plenty of time. I have young Malfoy to inform me what goes on at the castle. You of course didn't know, which made it all the more easier. He's informed me about something interesting. Just before this meeting here, he as informed me that you are what you call a Half Blood Prince, am I correct?"
"I know nothing this boy speaks of. Me a halfblood, that's absurd!" shouted Severus.
"What do you mean by that, Severus? Are you saying that halfbloods are nothing but filth, because I agree with you. But when you are saying that, you are also saying that to your Master. Severus, I am a halfblood like you." then his voice started to get hoarse. "And so to let you know, I know that young Malfoy speaks the truth, for I have already read his mind. I found out some interesting things out. Like how you had a little fight with Potter, before you left the school grounds. Why is it he who provoked you, instead of the other way around. You were called a coward, and you shouted at him...nothing more. You had the opportunity to kill young Potter, and you let him live."
"Master...I thought you would want to kill young Potter. I did not know of your plans for the boy."
"Liar! You knew that I had no use for the boy, since Dumbledore was killed. You knew that he would no longer be protected by his relatives as soon as he reached seventeen, and you failed to mention this too. I am starting to wonder what side you really work for."
"Master, I serve no one, but you." said Severus calmly.
"Then if you served me, then you would have let young Malfoy kill Dumbledore. It was supposed to be a test, to see if he was ready, and now I do not know if he is capable of killing. Oh but of course, you expected to be rewarded by killing Dumbledore did you not?"
"Master, I wish not to be rewarded, for I have disobeyed you, and I am deeply sorry. I beg for your forgiveness." said Severus, kissing the hem of the robe again.
"Lord Voldemort does not forgive easily, Severus, and you do know that...and I do not think you're really sorry. Maybe I should let young Malfoy here teach you a lesson...a lesson on how to be loyal to your Master, to do what he wishes. Draco, I want you to use the Cruciatus Curse on him. Don't hold back either. You have to be angered just enough to hurt someone."
Sweat fell down Malfoy's face. He rose his wand so it was it front of Severus. His hand was trembeling, as he got ready to use an Unforgivable Curse. He had never really used one to the fullest extent. He had started to use it on Potter, when Potter used a spell that almost killed him. He didn't know if he would be able to do it. He nodded his head to show that he knew what he had to do.
Severus was as calm as he walked into the room. He was confident that Malfoy wouldn't use the Cruciatus Curse on him. He knew that Malfoy wouldn't. He wasn't capable of killing Dumbledore, so why would he be able to hurt him with the Cruciatus? But just in case he was ready. He was going to regret using his spell on Malfoy. But he had really no choice. Malfoy ruined his plan. He planned on overthrowing the Dark Lord. No he wasn't with the Order, so this isn't a favor to them. No this was personal indeed. He was still what people call evil.
How was it??? I want honest opinions.
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Aug 5th, 2005 06:55 PM |
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Midnight109
Senior Member
Gender: Female Location: Dreaming |
It was great !!!!!!!!!!!! more ! more ! more! more !
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Previously Hermione202 and Midnight_Miss
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Aug 5th, 2005 08:15 PM |
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MerMorgan02
I Am On Errantry
Gender: Female Location: The Highway of Stars... |
OMG, that was amazing!
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Avalon est un monde sans danger! Bug off!! I'm reading!
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Aug 5th, 2005 08:25 PM |
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xEsaulx
Bringer of Life
Gender: Male Location: The Land of Quar |
I will get more in an hour or so. thank you very much for reading it. You guys are the best.
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Aug 5th, 2005 08:59 PM |
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ChiquitaZ
Everybody's Changing <3
Gender: Female Location: Breathing the fresh air |
Not bad.......Dark Lord seemed to bellow alot.....and Snape seemed a bit too full of himself. but sides that it's pretty good.
continue.
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someday soon we will all know....
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Aug 6th, 2005 02:37 AM |
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xEsaulx
Bringer of Life
Gender: Male Location: The Land of Quar |
here's some more. still on chapter one.
"Crucio!" said Malfoy loudly, yet his voice was nervous.
Severus was ready though. He held up his wand and said: "Protego!" a small shield protected him. Though it didn't protect him from the full effect of the spell. He had recieved some of the damage the spell had caused. He then got ready to use another spell. "Sectumsempra" Malfoy fell to the floor, shouting with pain. His wand flew to the ground when Severus said: "Accio wand." Malfoy's wand moved into his hand.Before the Dark Lord could do anything, Severus had Apperated.
The Dark Lord shouted with rage. Never before had someone done this to him. No one ever defied Lord Voldemort and survived. Severus was a dead man, as soon as he found him. His plan was ruined, young Potter would do the exact opposite. He would keep all of this for himself. No one would believe him that Malfoy was injured and Severus escaped. They would say that he was messing with his head again, like he did two years ago.
The Dark Lord sat back down in his chair, letting Malfoy scream in pain. He did not care if he was in agony or not. He had failed for the last time too. He could kill him, but he has a better idea for him. He would have him do the biggest favor in the world. All he had to do was to make sure Malfoy was up to it. He would give him a simple test. And if he passed he would move on to the job he had in store for him. If he failed then he would die.
"Malfoy, get up now." said the Dark Lord calmly. Malfoy was bleeding so bad, if he lost anymore then he would surely die. The Dark Lord muttered something and the wounds healed."I am willing to give you one more chance.If you fail me again then I will kill you. You are to kill your mother, Narcissa. She had disobeyed me long enough. If you are to succeed then you will go on to the next job I have for you. You are to travel with one of my Death Eaters, and you are to be with that person at all times. No ammount of money will bribe you out of this job. And I will know if you succeed in your mission. Do not come back until it is done. Is that understood Malfoy?"
"T-thank you Master. I will not fail you again." he said with confidence. His voice may be confident but he didn't look it. He bowed, and moved to kiss the hem of his robe,then left.
"Avery, Macnair!" he shouted to the air. "I have a job for you." Two people Apperated in front of the Dark Lord. They bowed and kissed the hem of his robe, just like Severus and Malfoy had done.
"My job for you is to look for one of my former Death Eaters. I want you to find Severus Snape, the Half Blood Prince, and I want you to kill him. He is fairly dangerous, so be on your ground. If he refuses to give up, then call for some of the other Death Eaters. Do not rest for anything. I want him DEAD! Be off." they bowed and Disapperated.
"Mundungus!" shouted the Dark Lord once more in the air. Again someone appeared. This man smelled of garbage, and wore filthy worn out clothes. But the Dark Lord ignored this. "Mundungus, do you have the locket?"
"S'matter with you? Blimey, I don't see why you need a locket in the firs' place."
"So the Imperius Curse wore off hmmm....no matter. Imperio!" muttered Voldemort out loud. 'Now you will tell me if you have the locket...the one you were supposed to steal from the Black's house."
"I haven't been able to get it you see. 'E was their at Hogsmeade. 'E caught me stealing one o' the Black's items. I needed to hide nice 'nd low for a bit."
'You have had plenty of time to get the locket. It is very important that I get it before Potter finds out where it is. Severus is lucky though, that he mentioned seeing a Slytherin marked locket while he was there. I was able to figure out how it got their. If Potter gets a hold of it, then I will lose another part of me. So if you don't come back the next time I call for you...then I shall kill you. Now get out of my sight you worthless pile of filth." Mundungus Disapperated from the room. He still had lots to do before the day was done.
"Wormtail!" shouted Voldemort for the third time. A small man appeared before him. His silver hand was rusted. "Where is Nagini? You better have treated her better than you treat me. Which in fact is pretty low."
"Master, Nagini is missing. I cannot find her anywhere. Master I have honestly looked, but nothing has come up."
Voldemort made a few hissing noises, and after ten minutes a snake withered into the room. This snake was Voldemort's pet, Nagini. And she was very important to him, very important indeed. He could contact his snake through the nearly dead language, known as Parlsmouth. The language first started with his ancestor, Salazar Slytherin. Now very few people knew this language. He only knew one person who shared this ability, which he himself gave to him, through the scar. This person was the reason why he lost his body in the first place. And he thought he was doing the right thing. The snake made hissing sounds at Voldemort. He hissed back at her. This went on for a couple of minutes, and then Nagini left.
"Nagini just told me that someone informed Narcissa of what I had planned for Malfoy. Seeing how I held a small meeting discussing that one of my humble servants would have to be with him at all times. But you Wormtail couldn't stand it. I believe that you had feelings for her, and you didn't want her to die at the hands of her only son. So you tipped her off as soon as the meeting was over, and now she has fled."
"Master...please forgive me...she...she had the Imperius Curse on me. I fought as hard as I could, but she had enough hate to consume almost anyone."
"Why should I believe you?" asked Voldemort. "Their is a way to tell if someone was under the Imperius Curse. The only way is to either read someone's mind or to do the Imperius Curse on that person. Both alone are not enough. The combination between the two of them makes it so telling the truth is unavoidable. Hmmm...maybe I should try it on you Wormtail. Legilimens!" muttered Voldemort.
Wormtail's mind was like an open book. Voldemort could see virtually anything he wants. This particular spot interested Voldemort a lot. It was in some sort of run down shack. He couldn't recognize it at all. He saw seven people there talking. He could here that someone betrayed the Potters, and that he should've died, and that they learned that he was a rat hiding for years. This part he was keen on hearing.
"He- he was taking over everywhere!" said the voice of Pettigrew. "Wh-what was there to gained by refusing him?"
"What was there to be gained by fighting the most evil wizard who has ever existed?" asked a man Voldemort recognized as Sirius Black. "Only innocent lives, Peter!"
"You don't understand!" cried out Pettigre. "He would have killed me, Sirius!"
"THEN YOU SHOULD HAVE DIED!" Black roared over Pettigres's whimpers. "DIED RATHER THAN BETRAY YOU FRIENDS. AS WE WOULD HAVE DONE FOR YOU!"
Another man with grayish hair started to speak. "You should have realized, if Voldemort didn't kill you we would. Good-bye, Peter."
"NO!" shouted the voice of Potter. "You can't kill him, you can't."
The image started to fade away. Another came up this time it was Wormtail and Narcissa. She held her wand out in her right hand.
"Narcissa...you wanted to see me?" asked Wormtail.
"Yes in fact I do...Imperio!" she shouted the Imperius Curse. "I want you to go to that meeting Master has planned. I want you to figure out what he is up to." This vision faded too. Voldemort had seen enough. He was happy...so far.
"So...the only reason you are here today is because of Potter. He saved you from the fate of what Sirius Black, and that other man would have done to you. So far you speak the truth. which makes me happy, but if I find out your lying your going to get a one way ticket to death." he started out. "Imperio." he muttered. "Now, I want you to tell me...what did Narcissa want with you?"
"She wanted me to tell her what the meeting was about." said Wormtaill.
"Did you on your own free will?" asked Voldemort.
"No, she used the Imperius Curse on me, Master." said Wormtail.
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Aug 6th, 2005 01:14 PM |
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Midnight109
Senior Member
Gender: Female Location: Dreaming |
MORE ! MORE! I WANT MORE
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Previously Hermione202 and Midnight_Miss
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Aug 6th, 2005 04:15 PM |
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xEsaulx
Bringer of Life
Gender: Male Location: The Land of Quar |
I will post more shortly. I'm glad you like it.
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Aug 6th, 2005 04:33 PM |
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Amber9
Well...it happens
Gender: Female Location: home, sweet home! |
nice. Wormtail and Narcissa....that would have been funny, but oh well. this definatly has a plot to it, so i very much like it! a lot of the 6th books that i read had nothing to them...but since you started out with what Voldermort was doing it was much better then the other ones i've read.
keep it up!
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Aug 6th, 2005 09:39 PM |
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crazykim
Senior Member
Gender: Female Location: in a harry potter trance |
its great, like ive said b4, i hope u can post more soon
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Roses are red
violets are blue
god made me beautiful
what happened to you?
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Aug 6th, 2005 11:24 PM |
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xEsaulx
Bringer of Life
Gender: Male Location: The Land of Quar |
who else besides Morgan, Hermione, Zonko, Crazykim, and Ginny is reading this. If you are...can you please comment!
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Aug 8th, 2005 02:12 AM |
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ChiquitaZ
Everybody's Changing <3
Gender: Female Location: Breathing the fresh air |
like it....it's going stronger than the first entry. the only part i didn't like was how Snape excaped from the Dark Lord so easily. i'm sure that Voldermort would have made sure that Snape couldn't get away so easily......but 'sides that it's good.
you said that you wanted us to be honest, so i was. i'm just saying these thing to help improve your story. it's going alot better than another 7th book that i've been reading.
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someday soon we will all know....
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Aug 8th, 2005 02:21 AM |
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xEsaulx
Bringer of Life
Gender: Male Location: The Land of Quar |
you are right. you are being honest, and i appreciate that. thank you for telling me this. well i wasn't really sure how i could make him escape. again...thank you for being honest...more tomorrow...or maybe even later.
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Aug 8th, 2005 02:25 AM |
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xEsaulx
Bringer of Life
Gender: Male Location: The Land of Quar |
when i post more tomorrow...it will be roughly the same length, and i will still be on chapter one. if any of you have an idea for a title or a plot could you pm me. I have a plot, but it is complicated, and it won't be mentioned for a while. whoever else is reading can you please post any comments, errors, something you want to be changed, or something you don't like. I would really appreciate it...it will help me when I go to write more.
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Aug 8th, 2005 02:43 AM |
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Midnight109
Senior Member
Gender: Female Location: Dreaming |
I agree with Zonko , Snape couldn't escape so easily........
Anyways , That was Great ! Keep it up !
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Previously Hermione202 and Midnight_Miss
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Aug 8th, 2005 03:53 AM |
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cole2005
Senior Member
Gender: Male Location: |
its really good keep it up, i think were gona see the partof Narcissa that is related to Sirius
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Aug 8th, 2005 12:37 PM |
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hpfanatic99
Member
Gender: Location: United States |
that was good write more
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Aug 9th, 2005 11:20 PM |
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xEsaulx
Bringer of Life
Gender: Male Location: The Land of Quar |
thanks...more coming in an hour or so...
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Aug 9th, 2005 11:22 PM |
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crazykim
Senior Member
Gender: Female Location: in a harry potter trance |
hey, i dont know the time difference, but has it been an hour?
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Roses are red
violets are blue
god made me beautiful
what happened to you?
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Aug 10th, 2005 06:11 PM |
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Midnight109
Senior Member
Gender: Female Location: Dreaming |
Its been about.......13-14 hours so........
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Previously Hermione202 and Midnight_Miss
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Aug 10th, 2005 06:21 PM |
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